# Describe your God
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [June 19, 2014, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148 "2014-06-19T15:23:51Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/1 "2014-06-19T15:23:51Z")
_ **If you happen to believe in a particular deity** _ please give as complete description as you can about the size, shape, personality, attributes, abilities etc. of the god/goddess/godthing you believe in. I’m not really interested in descriptions of deities you personally do not believe in, which is why I posted this in IMHO instead of Great Debates.
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### Author:  [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/2 "2014-06-19T16:31:42Z")
About the size of a Volkswagon, shaped like a pile of spaghetti with meatballs in his cheeks and eyes at the end of his long, noodly stalks. He’s capricious, benevolent, and tasty, especially in some alfredo sauce. He can do anything but chooses to do nothing for the most part
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### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/3 "2014-06-19T16:33:24Z")
We got into a discussion about this before, so at the risk of further cementing my place in Internet Kookdom:
Deity: The Universe
size: infinite
shape: a really big pancake with a bulgy middle
personality: indifferent
attributes: composed of stars, suns, planets, quasars, pulsars, dark matter, aether, comets, asteroids, and other stray heavenly bodies, is visible, and actually exists
abilities: converts energy to matter and matter to energy, combines elements over the course of billions of years into new elements, expands
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### Author:  [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/4 "2014-06-19T16:38:25Z")
Its a dachshund. Kinda long, low with cobby feet. Smell kinda bad.
Oh, nevermind. I misread that thread title.
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### Author:  [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/5 "2014-06-19T16:41:35Z")
The sun makes a pretty good god. Bright, warm, provides almost all the energy we can get on this planet. Nonjudgmental, measurable, reliably comes back when it leaves for the night. Doesn’t ask for anything in return. Etc
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/6 "2014-06-19T16:42:51Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#):
>
> About the size of a Volkswagon, shaped like a pile of spaghetti with meatballs in his cheeks and eyes at the end of his long, noodly stalks. He’s capricious, benevolent, and tasty, especially in some alfredo sauce. He can do anything but chooses to do nothing for the most part
Do you actually believe that this deity exists, or were you trying to be the first in with a “cute” reply?
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/7 "2014-06-19T16:45:34Z")
> [@garygnu](#):
>
> The sun makes a pretty good god. Bright, warm, provides almost all the energy we can get on this planet. Nonjudgmental, measurable, reliably comes back when it leaves for the night. Doesn’t ask for anything in return. Etc
Is the sun a deity you actually believe in?
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### Author:  [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/8 "2014-06-19T16:53:33Z")
I guess my “God” would be Gaia, described in wikipedia as _“a dynamic system that shapes the Earth’s biosphere, and maintains the Earth as a fit environment for life.”_
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### Author:  [@StayseaDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StayseaDee)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/9 "2014-06-19T16:56:04Z")
A mass of bright white light and a soft and calming voice.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/10 "2014-06-19T16:58:48Z")
> [@StayseaDee](#):
>
> A mass of bright white light and a soft and calming voice.
Any other attributes?
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### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/11 "2014-06-19T17:04:49Z")
Nothing is greater than god.
Any god.
Nothing is just awesome. When I look at a leafy seadragon, or an amazing sunset, or the bizarre dance between Janus and Epimethus, nothing gives me greater pleasure than to know that nothing is behind all that.
The trackless, timeless, dimensionless void of not-something.
And someday, I will be a part of that.
_well, sort of: the fact of my existence disqualifies me from ever truly being nothing_
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### Author:  [@StayseaDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StayseaDee)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/12 "2014-06-19T17:14:24Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> Any other attributes?
Not really. I just don’t see God as a human, but just a mass of light and energy that provides a sense of comfort.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/13 "2014-06-19T17:18:44Z")
> [@StayseaDee](#):
>
> Not really. I just don’t see God as a human, but just a mass of light and energy that provides a sense of comfort.
Thank you, then.
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### Author:  [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/14 "2014-06-19T17:33:28Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> Is the sun a deity you actually believe in?
“Believe in”? I can go outside and see it, and feel its influence on our planet.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/15 "2014-06-19T17:43:08Z")
> [@garygnu](#):
>
> “Believe in”? I can go outside and see it, and feel its influence on our planet.
Do you actually think that it is a god/deity?
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### Author:  [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/16 "2014-06-19T17:49:03Z")
I really do believe in God and maintain what I call a concious contact. I believe our universe is at best microscopic and his demension has no relation to anything physical we can comprehend. As far as indifferent goes, I think in the grand scheme of things he has a plan but we may be hundreds of billions of years away from this plan yet and everything happening inbetween is just leading up to it. I think he understands the importance of physical things reaching equallibriums and living things evolving, I dont believe even he would have the knowledge to just place everthing needed correctly but he does have a plan which will allow this to develop. I am not positive he hears me connecting with him but I feel as if he does.
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### Author:  [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/17 "2014-06-19T17:50:05Z")
About 70, with a handlebar moustache and warts all over his face. He’s the ugliest motherfucker you’ve ever seen, but could probably still kick your ass while playing “Ace of Spades” like a boss.
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### Author:  [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/18 "2014-06-19T17:52:38Z")
For me God is Spirit, not described or defined by any material characteristics. God certainly exists to me, but as energy, or a force, not a finite individual being.
1 John 4: 8 or 16 God is Love
From my church’s textbook\*:
> [@](#):
>
> …English is inadequate to the expression of spiritual conceptions and propositions, because one is obliged to use material terms in dealing with spiritual ideas.
\*_Science and Health, with Key to the Scriptures_ by Mary Baker Eddy
In other words, even if I could figure out how to tell you, I’d be getting it sort of wrong.
When I pray (which I do daily) it is not to ask God to manage my life or change anything, it’s for me to gain a greater understanding of the spiritual nature of what already exists and has always existed.
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### Author:  [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/19 "2014-06-19T18:07:03Z")
If you don’t believe in God, a god, goddesses or whatever that’s perfectly fine. However, this thread was started to discuss such entities. Please do not threadshit. Thank you.
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### Author:  [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)
#### Post date: [June 19, 2014, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-god/691148/20 "2014-06-19T18:08:08Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#):
>
> We got into a discussion about this before, so at the risk of further cementing my place in Internet Kookdom:
>
> Deity: The Universe
> size: infinite
> shape: a really big pancake with a bulgy middle
> personality: indifferent
> attributes: composed of stars, suns, planets, quasars, pulsars, dark matter, aether, comets, asteroids, and other stray heavenly bodies, is visible, and actually exists
> abilities: converts energy to matter and matter to energy, combines elements over the course of billions of years into new elements, expands
Do you feel it has a mind and/or consciousness? Or is that not required for you defintion of a god?
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