# Describe Your Million Dollar Invention **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 10, 2009, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749 "2009-12-10T18:14:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/21 "2009-12-11T16:03:18Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > Disney World If you’re really looking into planning a Disney World vacation, I can help you, as can some of our Orlandopers as well as **_len_** , who is a co-writer of a Disney travel guide. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/22 "2009-12-11T16:11:34Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > If you’re really looking into planning a Disney World vacation, I can help you, as can some of our Orlandopers as well as **_len_** , who is a co-writer of a Disney travel guide. I may take you up on that! My parents just moved from Tucson, AZ to the Villages and we’re thinking of taking the kids down there so they can finally see Disney World. We thought about over Christmas break but found out that that’s probably the worst time to go down there. ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/23 "2009-12-11T16:53:02Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > They have these for [golf clubs](http://www.golfcartshowcase.com/push-carts.htm), and have for years. The first time I saw one, some old guy was walking towards his clubs – as they were rolling away from him towards a water hazard! For a split second I thought about running to help, before they took a bath, and then realized what was happening. > > Obviously they could be easily modified for suitcases as well. Dang! I gotta start working on this! ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/24 "2009-12-11T17:02:09Z")
Does anyone get the impression that the OP’s trying to find easily doable ideas for a get-rich-quick scheme? 😉 My idea, and I’ll never have the expertise to do this, is gloves that are warm, but as thin as latex gloves so that you can wear them and still type. Perfect for like the 95% of women in my office that are constantly cold no matter what season it is outside. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/25 "2009-12-11T17:05:25Z")
I’m going to make a fortune marketing single-serve, pre-chilled, pre-mixed cocktails. I’m not talking about the wimpy “Jack and Coke” crap you can buy in the liquor store refrigerator that’s the same alcohol % as a bottle of Bud, I’m talking _real_ mixed drinks. A _good_ rum and Coke should be about 20 proof or so! Ditto all the big half-gallon bottles of “pre-made” cocktails that have the Chi-Chi’s logo or what-the-hell-ever on them. When I _do_ buy those (to take to a party or something) folks invariably end up _adding_ more booze to them. They are wimpy and they suck. I’d package a ready-to-drink Long Island Iced Tea that will kick your ass like the real thing! ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/26 "2009-12-11T17:36:30Z")
I’ve often thought I’d make my first million from inventing something that allows you to poke someone in the eye over the internet. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/27 "2009-12-11T18:32:48Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Does anyone get the impression that the OP’s trying to find easily doable ideas for a get-rich-quick scheme? 😉 Balderdash! My integrity now sullied, I’m overcome with extreme melancholy…I may never post again! > [@YogSosoth](#): > > My idea, and I’ll never have the expertise to do this, is gloves that are warm, but as thin as latex gloves so that you can wear them and still type. Perfect for like the 95% of women in my office that are constantly cold no matter what season it is outside. _Hmmm… latex-like gloves that keep ones fingers warm, yet pliable enough to type with…_ _\<…unsheathes slide rule and removes mechanical pencil from atop ear; doodles copiously on pad; gets quotes from wholesale Chinese manufacturer; calls patent attorney; puts deposit on Cigarette 42X/Mercruiser Racing SCI 1075; scratches head; imaginary light bulb flickers on above head…\>_ …tell you what, Mr. or Ms. YogSoSoth, if you’ll just sign and return those silly papers I just emailed you ASAP (just a couple of save-the-whale-type petitions, I assure you…not even worth reading, really), then I’ll consider my integrity de-sullied and we can call it even, s’alright? ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/28 "2009-12-11T19:21:52Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > My idea, and I’ll never have the expertise to do this, is gloves that are warm, but as thin as latex gloves so that you can wear them and still type. Perfect for like the 95% of women in my office that are constantly cold no matter what season it is outside. Gloves that are thin enough to allow me continued dexterous functionality but still keep my hands warm?? If they also are sweat-resistant, I will pay you quite a bit of money for a pair of those! 😉 Seriously, first thing in the morning, half of the function of my coffee mug is that I can pick it up every few minutes to warm my hands, then continue typing! ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/29 "2009-12-11T20:12:05Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > Gloves that are thin enough to allow me continued dexterous functionality but still keep my hands warm?? If they also are sweat-resistant, I will pay you quite a bit of money for a pair of those! 😉 So will the bandsmen and -women who have to play metal instruments outside in Cleveland in 15-degree December. Trust me. I thought of celebrity voices on GPS before I knew they were available. But they cost too much and there aren’t enough voices to choose from. I definitely need Jake Blues to say “Hit it” when I pull out of the driveway and Stephen Fry as Jeeves to say “Beg pardon, madam, but it seems that they have moved the exit ramp” when I screw up. I do NOT need Clint Eastwood saying “Right turn, Clyde.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/30 "2009-12-11T21:12:07Z")
> [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](#): > > How would they differ from unpowered eyeglasses that correct your vision? When the glasses are not in direct sunlight, the lenses turn opaque. ---
**Author:** ![FredGarven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@FredGarven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FredGarven)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2009, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/31 "2009-12-11T23:40:11Z")
My invention is a system for ALL cars that helps prevent tailgaiting. It will be attached to your speed indicator and calculate 22 feet per 10 mph. When it senses other vehicles behind you within that distance, your center brake light begins to flash. The closer a car gets behind, the faster it flashes. Once a certain threshold is crossed (5 feet per 10 mph), an automatic oil-slick / fog-screen is deployed forcing the menace on your ass to back off or die! ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2009, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/32 "2009-12-12T05:48:53Z")
here’s a silly idea, but would work for cat lovers: A cat collar with a bow. Or the standard flea collar, jazzed up with a bow tie on the buckle. Many (most?) cat owners buy a collar for their fluffy-wuffy pet, and lots of people just love overly-cutesy stuff . You market it at the pet store, with a cutesy pic of “The Aristocratic Cat”: the one who dresses formally, and owns the house. (imagine a black-and-white “tuxedo” cat, sitting up proudly, with its formal black tie showing prominently against its white furry neck. It’s the same as all the other flea collars on the shelf, but this one grabs your attention, so you pick it up even if it costs 50 cents more. (this idea is actually feasable…If there are , I dunno, 30 million cat owners who shop at pet stores you could get a million sales) ---
**Author:** ![NoiseBomb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/49beb7/32.png) [@NoiseBomb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoiseBomb)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2009, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/33 "2009-12-13T05:07:20Z")
> [@FredGarven](#): > > Once a certain threshold is crossed (5 feet per 10 mph), an automatic oil-slick / fog-screen is deployed forcing the menace on your ass to back off or die! I had an old beater truck like that. Put the transmission into neutral and floor it… Presto! Nice black fog for a few seconds for the guy behind me. When the engine finally gave out completely, the guy from the scrapyard gave me $100 for the truck. He better not be getting rich off this idea! ---
**Author:** ![jimmycolorado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/4bbf92/32.png) [@jimmycolorado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimmycolorado)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/34 "2009-12-14T06:51:34Z")
> [@FredGarven](#): > > My invention is a system for ALL cars that helps prevent tailgaiting. It will be attached to your speed indicator and calculate 22 feet per 10 mph. When it senses other vehicles behind you within that distance, your center brake light begins to flash. The closer a car gets behind, the faster it flashes. Once a certain threshold is crossed (5 feet per 10 mph), an automatic oil-slick / fog-screen is deployed forcing the menace on your ass to back off or die! This is a good idea (except for the killing-the-other-car part). I wouldn’t bother with the blinking though, just make the brake lights come on full red. That’s definitely enough to make the car tail-gating you to _think_ you’ve hit the brakes and are slowing down. I can think of times when, during the late day or twilight, when it’s still light enough to not have your headlights on, someone tail-gating me slowed down or changed lanes when I turned my headlights on: when you turn your lights on, your tail lights also turn on (but not your brake lights), so it gives the impression that you’ve hit the brakes. To contribute to the OP: I’ve always wondered how expensive it would be to add a 12-digit numbered key pad to alarm clock radios. The kind of key pad on phones. This way, it would make setting the time (and especially the alarm) a matter of seconds, instead of holding two buttons until the clock rounds out to the time you want (and devil forbid you accidentally go over the time you want by a few minutes, forcing you to hold the two buttons to cycle through another 24 hours to get the correct time set). ---
**Author:** ![Scathach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Scathach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scathach)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/35 "2009-12-14T19:11:30Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > Gloves that are thin enough to allow me continued dexterous functionality but still keep my hands warm?? If they also are sweat-resistant, I will pay you quite a bit of money for a pair of those! 😉 > > Seriously, first thing in the morning, half of the function of my coffee mug is that I can pick it up every few minutes to warm my hands, then continue typing! > **[fingerless gloves - Google Search](https://www.google.ie/search?rlz=1C1CHNG_enIE340IE340&sourceid=chrome&q=fingerless+gloves&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi&tbm=isch)** ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/36 "2009-12-14T20:03:08Z")
> [@Scathach](#): > > [fingerless gloves - Google Search](http://images.google.ie/images?rlz=1C1CHNG_enIE340IE340&sourceid=chrome&q=fingerless%20gloves&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi) I have daughters who are 22 and 18; believe me, I _know_ about fingerless gloves! 😉 (Not to mention, being kind of a rebellious dresser myself as a late-teen/young-adult, I have worn my fair share; bothered the hell out of me because people would accuse me of trying to “copy Madonna”, when, in fact, I was doing it _before_ Madonna was famous! 😛 ) ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/37 "2009-12-14T20:41:38Z")
> [@FredGarven](#): > > My invention is a system for ALL cars that helps prevent tailgaiting. It will be attached to your speed indicator and calculate 22 feet per 10 mph. When it senses other vehicles behind you within that distance, your center brake light begins to flash. The closer a car gets behind, the faster it flashes. Once a certain threshold is crossed (5 feet per 10 mph), an automatic oil-slick / fog-screen is deployed forcing the menace on your ass to back off or die! I think it should shoot a big red turtle shell with a homing device at the offending car. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/38 "2009-12-14T21:53:22Z")
> [@FredGarven](#): > > Once a certain threshold is crossed (5 feet per 10 mph), an automatic oil-slick / fog-screen is deployed forcing the menace on your ass to back off or die! Instead of an oil slick, may I suggest a poop slick? Or a fart cloud instead of a fog cloud. My own million-dollar invention? A [portable motorcycle tire changing stand.](http://home.comcast.net/~prestondrake/mojostand_instructions.pdf) Not as glamorous as a tailgater-fart-fogger, I know, but it was very well-received by the 39 customers I sold them to _(I kept the 40th one)_. Despite a design revision (and a price increase) after the first batch of 20, they still turned out to be a lot of work to make, and I couldn’t justify the labor input _(dollars per hour was better than my day job, but it needs to be **really** good if I’m going to spend my precious spare time doing it)_. Someone with a mass-production mindset or a smarter eye for cost-cutting design could make a million bucks out of it. Ain’t gonna be me. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2009, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/39 "2009-12-14T22:04:34Z")
I actually do hold four patents. As for my other ideas, I should put a million dollar idea here for free? I did have dreams about how to make two different devices – a 3-D TV set and a Butane lighter-powered toy car. But working 3D TV patents are a dime a dozen, and I suspect people would think a butane-powered toy was too dangerous. I don’t think either of them is worth a million. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2009, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749/40 "2009-12-15T03:22:14Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > I actually do hold four patents. > > As for my other ideas, I should put a million dollar idea here for free? If you’re not going to do anything with them, why not share them and make the world a better place? If you’re going to do something with them, you may want to get a patent; if it’s one of those four patents you already hold, then you’re protected, so spit 'em out, let’s see what your brilliant ideas are! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/describe-your-million-dollar-invention/520749.md?page=3)