# "Devotees" in the news again

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 11, 2012, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893 "2012-07-11T14:19:52Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/1 "2012-07-11T14:19:52Z")

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Boy I hate how cynical I’ve become. Anyone smell a rat[here](http://www.villagevoice.com/advice/savage-love-411/?ref=navigation)?

> [@](#):
>
> I’m a smart, professional woman in my mid-30s who dates the same. I also happen to use a wheelchair; I was diagnosed shortly after my first birthday with a motor neuron disease. I have about as much physical strength as a quadriplegic but I have full sensation. (Boy howdy, do I!) I am careful about who I date because of my physical dependence on the people around me. I am also wary of folks who call themselves "devotees.

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/2 "2012-07-11T14:58:12Z")

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There’s a big difference between ‘skeptical’ and ‘cynical.’

Seeing a recurrence of a familiar pattern like this should have anyone’s spidey-sense tingling.

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**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/3 "2012-07-11T15:14:34Z")

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Looks like she’s a lesbian this week, too.

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**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/4 "2012-07-11T15:17:47Z")

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> [@RTFirefly](#):
>
> There’s a big difference between ‘skeptical’ and ‘cynical.’

You’re right. Color me skeptical.

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**Author:** ![Zjestika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/8edcca/32.png) [@Zjestika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zjestika)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/5 "2012-07-11T15:46:21Z")

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I wish someone like this could be honest and self-aware enough to tell us why they’re doing this. Is it tricking people that gets him/her off, or creating the new characters, what? I guess I just don’t understand the psychology behind trolling. I find it really interesting though.

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**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/6 "2012-07-11T16:20:02Z")

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Amazing, that this person would resurface again in this similar way. Me too, I’m skeptical.

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/7 "2012-07-11T22:28:48Z")

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Assuming it’s her (and if I could get a bet down on that somewhere, I would!), she’s making it LOTS harder for herself to go undetected in the future. A lot of people read Dan Savage.

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**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/8 "2012-07-11T22:43:59Z")

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Just remember that people can reply to Dan Savage’s columns, depending on where they’re posted. Try the original column at the Stranger; often the replies are more interesting than Dan’s, and posters have been known to change Dan’s response’s to certain things.

> **[The Stranger: Seattle's Only Newspaper](https://www.thestranger.com/)**
>
> The Stranger, Seattle's Only Newspaper: Covering Seattle news, politics, music, film, and arts; plus movie times, club calendars, restaurant listings, forums, blogs, and Savage Love.

So if anyone’s up for calling out some BS, go for it!

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**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2012, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/9 "2012-07-11T23:39:44Z")

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All’s I want to know is, is she RICH? (Or her family?)

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**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/10 "2012-07-12T01:42:39Z")

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Ok, I usually lurk on the board, and I wasn’t even lurking when the whole umkay thing went down. So a few days ago, when I thought to myself, “gee, what’s going on with SDMB?” I came and discovered I had missed a rather dramatic interlude. What struck me about the whole umkay mess is that I know someone that rather reminds me of the whole persona she was presenting. A few key differences, naturally.  
She’s a pretty blonde. She is older than umkay (wasn’t umkay in her 20s?) - she is in her 30s. She is wheelchair bound, but there wasn’t an accident involved, she was diagnosed at a very young age (just after birth maybe) with a … condition. I don’t remember any details about her handicap, I’m afraid. She is VERY outspoken about her sexuality, and unlike umkay she is a vocal advocate of the handicapped and is also active in the LGBT community. I knew her when we were kids, and we are FB friends now. Some of umkay’s answers reminded me strongly of this woman that I used to know in real life. I have never heard her mention devotees though. But reading the column linked, I immediately thought of my friend. I hope it is umkay in the linked column, and not my childhood friend. She’s pretty amazing, though I haven’t really been in touch with her lately (beyond the FB feed, that is).

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**Author:** ![SubaRhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@SubaRhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SubaRhubarb)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/11 "2012-07-12T03:06:51Z")

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> [@Taomist](#):
>
> Just remember that people can reply to Dan Savage’s columns, depending on where they’re posted. Try the original column at the Stranger; often the replies are more interesting than Dan’s, and posters have been known to change Dan’s response’s to certain things.
> 
> [The Stranger: Seattle's Only Newspaper](http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=14145241)
> 
> So if anyone’s up for calling out some BS, go for it!

I wrote to him via email and said I thought he was being duped. Here is his response:

" damn, really?

they’re all just good hypotheticals to every reader but one. still, i hate running fakes.

do you have proof she’s fake? links?

dan"  
Oh shityes links. From nursing forums to reddit.

I get so bored at work.

raventhief, do you really believe a person that is a strong advocate for lgbt rights and is very vocal about their own wants and rights is going to whimper at Dan Savage about a creepy person?

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**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/12 "2012-07-12T04:09:02Z")

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Suba, that’s a really good point. i can’t imagine the strong, amazing woman that is my friend whimpering about anything. My knee jerk reaction was “I hope my old friend isnt getting her heart broken.” But I dont see her crying to an advice columnist about it if she were.

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**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/13 "2012-07-12T04:23:13Z")

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> [@SubaRhubarb](#):
>
> Oh shityes links. From nursing forums to reddit.

Did I miss something or are you holding out on us?

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**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/14 "2012-07-12T05:41:53Z")

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Today’s Savage Love:

> **[July 11, 2012](https://www.avclub.com/july-11-2012-1798232174?utm_medium=RSS&utm_campaign=feeds&utm_source=type_savage-love)**
>
> I’m a smart, professional woman in my mid-30s who dates the same. I also happen to use a wheelchair; I was diagnosed shortly after my first birthday with a motor-neuron disease. I have about as much physical strength as a quadriplegic, but I have...

Woman in a wheelchair, check. Sort of a quad, check. Leery about devotees, check. Finds out after “clicking” with someone that they’re a devotee, check.

Thoughts?

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**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/15 "2012-07-12T05:44:19Z")

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Already [been started](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=658172).

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**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/16 "2012-07-12T05:48:21Z")

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Ahh hell. And I was so proud of myself. ☹

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**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/17 "2012-07-12T07:11:06Z")

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> [@Ambivalid](#):
>
> Already [been started](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=658172).

Check.

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**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/18 "2012-07-12T07:31:26Z")

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> [@Zjestika](#):
>
> I wish someone like this could be honest and self-aware enough to tell us why they’re doing this. Is it tricking people that gets him/her off, or creating the new characters, what? I guess I just don’t understand the psychology behind trolling. I find it really interesting though.

I haven’t really followed this whole saga in detail but I would have thought it was someone who is sexually or otherwise excited by the issues involved. In other words, if I’m understanding the concept right, a devotee. They just like fantasising and getting other people involved in and talking about their fantasy while typing with one hand. It’s like that guy a while back who asked some question on the SDMB about what he should do about a situation involving him, his best friend’s Korean wife, a dinner party and her feet. As he admitted, he was just asking “agony aunt” questions as an excuse to mull over his sexual fantasy.

ETA: or even more famously, the “pyjama pants girl” saga, which was just a guy with a romantic/sexual fantasy about meeting a skimpily dressed college girl (cue cheesy porn track music) and gets a whole heap of folks here to play along.

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**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/19 "2012-07-12T12:34:19Z")

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Is it wrong that I’m kind of glad to see she’s still out there, doing what she does? I’d hate to think her experiences here at the Dope had crushed her spirit.

Stay weird, ummkay? 🙂

(then come back and answer a genuine “Ask the…” thread, about the person behind the persona!)

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**Author:** ![Emiliana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@Emiliana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emiliana)\
**Post date:** [July 12, 2012, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893/20 "2012-07-12T12:47:26Z")

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I read the column before seeing this thread and didn’t think of umkay at all. There _are_ women in wheelchairs and devotees attracted to them. And a letter to a newspaper column doesn’t have much potential for sustained drama.

Of course, any number of the letters in Savage Love strike me as possible fakes. The first one I ever read involved bondage and a sweaty running shoe.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/devotees-in-the-news-again/627893.md?page=2)
