# Diamond gift ideas **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 1, 2014, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038 "2014-12-01T15:43:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/1 "2014-12-01T15:43:12Z")
My wife has been dropping lots of not-very-subtle hints about getting diamonds for Christmas. She and I both know that’s not going to happen, but I thought it might be fun to get lots of cheap diamond related stuff for her stocking. My ideas so far: 1. A can of Blue Diamond almonds 2. A Neil Diamond CD That’s all I got. Any ideas or suggestions? ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/2 "2014-12-01T16:33:25Z")
Don’t forget [Diamond Dave](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diamond_Dave_%28album%29)! ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/3 "2014-12-01T16:36:45Z")
A deck of cards has a lot of diamonds! ---
**Author:** ![Whiskey\_Dickens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9fc348/32.png) [@Whiskey\_Dickens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whiskey_Dickens)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/4 "2014-12-01T16:39:54Z")
Actual diamond coated drill bits! [Diamond coated drill bit example](http://www.diamond-drill-bit-and-tool.com/Diamond-Drill/Diamond-Drill-Bit.shtml) ---
**Author:** ![rsat3acr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a3d4f5/32.png) [@rsat3acr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rsat3acr)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/5 "2014-12-01T16:54:37Z")
I think the diamond gag gifts are a good idea if followed up with a real diamond. Just the gag gifts alone maybe not, depending on your wife’s sense of humor. I know so folks who would be in deep trouble doing that. YMMV ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/6 "2014-12-01T17:40:52Z")
Get a ridiculously oversized cubic ziroconia (the cheaper-looking the better) ring/tacky earrings. > [@FairyChatMom](#): > > A deck of cards has a lot of diamonds! That’s what immediately came to my mind when I saw the thread title: 1/4 of a deck of cards. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/7 "2014-12-01T21:49:05Z")
> [@Lubricious\_Integument](#): > > 1. A can of Blue Diamond almonds This would be enough for me. Man, I love those almonds. What about argyle socks? They have diamonds on them. ---
**Author:** ![arseNal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@arseNal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/arseNal)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/8 "2014-12-01T22:42:01Z")
Not exactly what you asked for, but what about a synthetic diamond? I understand that dealers can’t even tell the difference without special equipment. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/9 "2014-12-01T22:49:21Z")
> [@arseNal](#): > > Not exactly what you asked for, but what about a synthetic diamond? I understand that dealers can’t even tell the difference without special equipment. I dislike the term “synthetic diamond”. Laboratory produced diamonds these days are real crystal carbon. They can only be told apart from mined diamonds because those grown in a lab have no inclusions. Back To The OP Mistubishi makes cheap canned food using the familiar logo and the name Three Diamonds. Springfield mayor Diamond Joe Quimby A small replica of a baseball diamond. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/10 "2014-12-01T23:03:20Z")
How about [Selma Diamond](http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120216133825/80snightcourt/images/8/82/Selma_Diamond.jpg)? ---
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/11 "2014-12-01T23:06:30Z")
In addition to drill bits there are diamond coated saw blades. Speaking of games, there is: > **[Diamonds: Second Edition](https://boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/152162/diamonds-second-edition)** > > Gem collectors compete to take handfuls of precious jewels. This one is hard to find in the US: > **[Diamonds Club](https://boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/37907/diamonds-club)** > > Compete with fellow gem dealers to build riches and create the most valuable park! Brian ---
**Author:** ![Terr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Terr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terr)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/12 "2014-12-01T23:23:28Z")
> [@arseNal](#): > > Not exactly what you asked for, but what about a synthetic diamond? I understand that dealers can’t even tell the difference without special equipment. The price difference is not that much. Maybe $1500 instead of $2000. ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/13 "2014-12-01T23:42:46Z")
A lump of coal, on those hand-strength exercise things and [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fR38h4xPfVo#t=62) ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/14 "2014-12-02T00:11:02Z")
I forgot to mention coal. D’oh! What about- Some useful carbon- graphite lubricant. Or get a cheap ring somewhere and glue a carrot to it. ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/15 "2014-12-02T01:07:08Z")
How about some [White Diamond](http://www.kohls.com/product/prd-c4658/elizabeth-taylor-white-diamonds-fragrance-collection-womens.jsp?pfx=pfx_google_roi&cid=aagdsa&gclid=CLzk4MKUpsICFRQQ7Aod3UsAJQ&gclsrc=aw.ds). Or a copy of the Screech sex tape. ---
**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/16 "2014-12-02T01:18:59Z")
Seems like the cash you’d spend buying several Diamond gag gifts would probably buy you a small diamond pendant or small diamond earrings. [Example](http://www.ebay.com/itm/16-Tiny-Diamonds-10-KT-White-Gold-Post-EARRINGS-Modern-Retro-Style-Squares-/121504446771?pt=US_Fine_Earrings&hash=item1c4a3ab933). That being said, maybe some memorabilia from Diamond Shamrock? An ashtray, a trucker cap, something like that? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/17 "2014-12-02T01:21:51Z")
If phonetics is your bag, here’s a [one-carat diamond pin.](http://www.craftsayings.com/projects/gag_gifts/dime_on_pin/carrotdimeonpin.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Cheez\_Whia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d26b3c/32.png) [@Cheez\_Whia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheez_Whia)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/18 "2014-12-02T01:35:56Z")
[This](http://www.ebay.com/itm/Seals-Crofts-45-Diamond-Girl-Wisdom-record-7-vinyl-/201015511019?pt=Music_on_Vinyl&hash=item2ecd7547eb) might be a possibility! ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/19 "2014-12-02T04:14:01Z")
A pin from a black diamond ski run. ---
**Author:** ![DataX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@DataX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DataX)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/20 "2014-12-02T04:53:52Z")
What 19 posts and no one mentions the obvious choice? Dustin Diamond - AKA screech on saved by the bell has his own sex tape: “Screeched – Saved by the Smell.” Sorry if I ruined Christmas [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038.md?page=2)