# Diamond gift ideas **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 1, 2014, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038 "2014-12-01T15:43:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/21 "2014-12-02T05:52:56Z")
> [@](#): > > What 19 posts and no one mentions the obvious choice? > > Dustin Diamond - AKA screech on saved by the bell has his own sex tape: > > “Screeched – Saved by the Smell.” > > Sorry if I ruined Christmas Psst-post #15 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/22 "2014-12-02T07:35:01Z")
> [@DataX](#): > > What 19 posts and no one mentions the obvious choice? > > Dustin Diamond - AKA screech on saved by the bell has his own sex tape: > > “Screeched – Saved by the Smell.” > > Sorry if I ruined Christmas He WHAT? Okay, I am never watching that show again. Forget ruining my Christmas – you just raped my adolescence. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/23 "2014-12-02T18:07:41Z")
[A song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eL7ETLLkQTY). ---
**Author:** ![DataX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@DataX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DataX)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/24 "2014-12-02T18:09:33Z")
> [@psychobunny](#): > > Psst-post #15 :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/25 "2014-12-02T18:11:41Z")
> [@Sarabellum1976](#): > > Seems like the cash you’d spend buying several Diamond gag gifts would probably buy you a small diamond pendant or small diamond earrings. > > [Example](http://www.ebay.com/itm/16-Tiny-Diamonds-10-KT-White-Gold-Post-EARRINGS-Modern-Retro-Style-Squares-/121504446771?pt=US_Fine_Earrings&hash=item1c4a3ab933). > > That being said, maybe some memorabilia from Diamond Shamrock? An ashtray, a trucker cap, something like that? Wife who hints at a gift of diamonds probably doesn’t have small earrings or pendants in mind! My own personal opinion is that I hate all that diamonds stand for. But that’s just me. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/26 "2014-12-02T18:30:05Z")
Ha! This is a fun idea. A bottle of [Sally Hansen Diamond](http://www.sallyhansen.com/nails/nail-color/color/diamond-strength%C2%AE-no-chip-nail-color)Strength nail polish. It should be available at most drugstores or big-box stores. Or get her a [DYMO label maker](http://www.staples.com/DYMO-LabelManager-160-Label-Maker-2-Lines-2-1-2-H-x/product_DYM1790415)and tell her “I thought you said you wanted a Dymo!” Seriously, if she doesn’t have one of these or the Brother equivalent, get her one. They’re super handy. > [@rsat3acr](#): > > I think the diamond gag gifts are a good idea if followed up with a real diamond. Just the gag gifts alone maybe not, depending on your wife’s sense of humor. I know so folks who would be in deep trouble doing that. YMMV There are so many ethical problems and foolishness associated with diamonds that it would be better not to buy a “real” diamond at all. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/27 "2014-12-02T19:51:49Z")
> [@rsat3acr](#): > > I think the diamond gag gifts are a good idea if followed up with a real diamond. Just the gag gifts alone maybe not, depending on your wife’s sense of humor. I know so folks who would be in deep trouble doing that. YMMV Mr Boods would be in deep trouble. He’d be in trouble for buying me diamonds, however, as he should know by now that he’s married someone who prefers sapphires 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/28 "2014-12-02T21:12:36Z")
If you want to go with a ‘theme’, along with the almonds you could get her a bag of [Diamond Walnuts](http://www.diamondnuts.com/product/walnuts/). ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/29 "2014-12-02T21:43:49Z")
[Diamond Crystal Salt](http://www.diamondcrystalsalt.com/default.aspx?gclid=CKeosNKpqMICFUpp7AodkEQAwg)…? …OK, but if she throws you over her left shoulder, don’t blame me… ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/30 "2014-12-02T21:46:50Z")
Hand her a 10 cent piece. Call her cell. Bam. Dime and ring. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Dracula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/54ee81/32.png) [@Count\_Dracula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Dracula)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/31 "2014-12-02T21:57:36Z")
My crystal ball says somebody is going to be sleeping on the couch Christmas Day! ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/32 "2014-12-02T21:58:18Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > Wife who hints at a gift of diamonds probably doesn’t have small earrings or pendants in mind! What does this wife - who probably doesn’t expect anything at all being that her husband clearly can’t afford them - have in mind, then? ---
**Author:** ![Fallen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@Fallen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fallen)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/33 "2014-12-02T22:18:36Z")
“She and I both know that’s not going to happen…” I have to seize on this. How do you “know” that she “know[s]” it’s not possible or more specifically “[can’t] happen”? People get tripped up by presuming who “knows” what. I suggest that perhaps she wouldn’t be dropping (plural) hints if in fact she “knows” it isn’t going to happen and’d have been dropping hints about what would instead if she in fact did “know”. There are plenty of cheap (as in flawed, but not visible to naked eye) diamonds to be had, or of very small weight/size. They’re usually carried by the department stores in many varieties. ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/34 "2014-12-03T00:26:35Z")
> [@Fallen](#): > > “She and I both know that’s not going to happen…” > > I have to seize on this. How do you “know” that she “know[s]” it’s not possible or more specifically “[can’t] happen”? > > People get tripped up by presuming who “knows” what. > > I suggest that perhaps she wouldn’t be dropping (plural) hints if in fact she “knows” it isn’t going to happen and’d have been dropping hints about what would instead if she in fact did “know”. > > There are plenty of cheap (as in flawed, but not visible to naked eye) diamonds to be had, or of very small weight/size. They’re usually carried by the department stores in many varieties. Yeah, this might be good advice but depends a lot on the person. If it’s a running gag where she always says “diamonds” when somebody asks what she wants, then a joke gift might be great – especially if her “real” gift is thoughtful. If she is hinting around hoping that a diamond might actually be possible, a gag gift could be a could be a bad idea. ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/35 "2014-12-03T00:31:53Z")
You could also get one of those Jane Seymour butt diamonds, then it’s a gag and a diamond all-in-one. ---
**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/36 "2014-12-03T00:36:20Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#): > > You could also get one of those Jane Seymour butt diamonds, then it’s a gag and a diamond all-in-one. I wondered aloud recently why the Open Butts necklace isn’t available with chocolate diamonds, which my husband and I refer to as “poop diamonds.” ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/37 "2014-12-03T00:44:17Z")
> [@Motorgirl](#): > > I wondered aloud recently why the Open Butts necklace isn’t available with chocolate diamonds, which my husband and I refer to as “poop diamonds.” 😃 I just laughed out loud, for real, thanks 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/38 "2014-12-03T02:18:15Z")
> [@Fallen](#): > > “She and I both know that’s not going to happen…” > > I have to seize on this. How do you “know” that she “know[s]” it’s not possible or more specifically “[can’t] happen”? > > People get tripped up by presuming who “knows” what. > > I suggest that perhaps she wouldn’t be dropping (plural) hints if in fact she “knows” it isn’t going to happen and’d have been dropping hints about what would instead if she in fact did “know”. > > There are plenty of cheap (as in flawed, but not visible to naked eye) diamonds to be had, or of very small weight/size. They’re usually carried by the department stores in many varieties. I know my wife as well as I know anyone. She is not expecting diamonds for Christmas. ETA: some of these ideas are great! Keep 'em coming! ---
**Author:** ![cybersnark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b9e5f3/32.png) [@cybersnark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cybersnark)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/39 "2014-12-03T02:29:07Z")
[http://www.ebay.com/itm/Clear-Crystal-Glass-Diamond-Shaped-Paperweight-Pre-Owned-/201231255634?pt=LH\_DefaultDomain\_0&hash=item2eda514852](http://www.ebay.com/itm/Clear-Crystal-Glass-Diamond-Shaped-Paperweight-Pre-Owned-/201231255634?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2eda514852) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2014, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038/40 "2014-12-03T03:52:36Z")
[The Diamond: Baseball Writings of Mark Harris](http://www.amazon.com/Diamond-Baseball-Writings-Mark-Harris/dp/1556113986/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1417578613&sr) - a bargain at $.01 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diamond-gift-ideas/706038.md?page=3)