# Did anybody ever raise their wife's libido? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 16, 2010, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-anybody-ever-raise-their-wifes-libido/546891 "2010-07-16T09:48:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 3\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-anybody-ever-raise-their-wifes-libido/546891/101 "2010-07-20T15:58:47Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Understood. The point is what happens next if I then say to her - or to the world in general, in her hearing - “Oh, don’t be hysterical, he’s not going to break your precious, precious vagina!”. I admit it’s possible that she might say “You know, you’re right, perhaps I ought to think again,” but I wouldn’t bet more than pocket change on it. 🙂 That’s because hysterical people are not, by definition, rational. 🙂 That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t point out to them that they’re being hysterical. If people just smile and nod and pat them on the hand, that just reinforces the idea that their hysteria is reasonable, which is beneficial for no one. Honestly, which would you rather someone told Poster M’s wife–“Oh, ffs, get a goddamn grip already,” or “Oh, poor thing, he’s a bad, bad, selfish asshole to suggest such a thing”? While the former most likely won’t be significantly _more_ helpful than the latter, I honestly can’t see how it would be _less_ so. > [@BigT](#): > > So, then, the next time someone complains about, I dunno, PMS, I should be able to bring up having a hysterectomy. If having an ovariohysterectomy were a 15 minute office procedure done with local anesthetic that had no long-term side effects and you could go back to normal activities within a week, it would absolutely merit mention as something to consider to stop PMS. And if vasectomy were a hospital procedure requiring general anesthesia, abdominal section, a six-week recovery time, and lifelong hormone therapy afterward, it would not merit discussion as a birth control option except as a last resort. But that’s not the case at all, is it? The two procedures aren’t all analogous in terms of time, complication, risk, or after effects. Having a vasectomy is far more analagous to having a Bartholin abscess lanced–inject some lidocain, make a small incision, root about a bit, boot you out the door. Your crotch will be tender and you’ll want to take it easy for a couple days, then you’re good to go, though you probably won’t want to have sex for a while. It’s not pleasant to contemplate or fun to experience, but it’s not the end of the world. Even when the lidocain doesn’t work, as is prone to happening with infected tissue. Trust me, I had my [del]procedure[/del] horrific, unspeakable maiming done last month. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2010, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-anybody-ever-raise-their-wifes-libido/546891/102 "2010-07-21T01:42:35Z")
Stop being beta. The more you act beta, the more you wreck her libido. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2010, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-anybody-ever-raise-their-wifes-libido/546891/103 "2010-07-21T15:34:57Z")
> [@marshmallow](#): > > Stop being beta. The more you act beta, the more you wreck her libido. So, what with the thread title 'n’all, are you saying that either you have a wife, and this has worked for you, or you are a wife, and this has worked _on_ you? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-anybody-ever-raise-their-wifes-libido/546891.md?page=5)