Surely you can’t think I’ll be vexed by your mocking the false gods of the Egyptians. Just leave Pallas out of it and no one will be hurt.
More seriously, Luke chapter 3 identifies Christ as the son of Joseph. I think the point of the Virgin Birth is that Mary conceived without intercourse (or even pre-intercourse playing around), not that Christ was no relationship to Joseph.
More like
thud
I’d say.
For Jesus to be the son of Joseph, Joseph’s sperm had to be involved. Since they didn’t have sex, did an angel appear and give him a Holy Hand-job, and have him spill his seed into a sacred turkey baster?
Or is that “on the downlow”?
It was an Immaculate Injection.
And they cooked the turkey in an oven of . . . wait for it . . .
Immaculate Convection.
And guess what they had for dessert?
I think the point of the Virgin Birth is to satisfy the conditions of a mistranslation (from Hebrew to Greek) of one of Isaiah’s messianic prophecies.
An Immaculate Confection?
Without clicking your link I know what you’re talking about – the whole “young woman” versus “intact hymen” thing. While I’m inclined to agree, I meant the notion of virgin birth as Xtians typically understand it.
No doubt!
I think the whole point of the Virgin Birth is not that Jesus had a particularly virtuous mother, but that He was/is the Son of God in a nonmetaphorical sense, like Herakles was the son of Zeus. (As I understand it, the Jews expect a Messiah who will be the Son of God in a metaphorical sense only – it’s a title meaning “chosen of God” or “favored of God,” but the Messiah will be a mortal man, born of woman and begotten by man.)
The only way one could be fully human and fully divine if humans were as the psalmist says:“You are gods, and sons of the most high”!
Then he would not be God, just human, as any person conceived today by a donated sperm. If Jesus had Joseph’s sperm, which Joseph was unaware of, then why did he think Mary was fooling around with someone else? He planned to put her away in secret! The NT, states she conceived of the holy spirit!
Yeah, I guess that would work.
Well, that’s one theory. My theory is, Gabriel ? He (it ?) tapped that ass. Didn’t even buy her bagels in the morning or anything. The Annunciation was “Bitch, that ain’t mine, you got no paper to prove nothing !”
Anyone who lived that long ago, it’s overwhelmingly likely that either they have no descendants at all any more, or that the entire current population of the planet is descended from them. So if there were literal descendants of Jesus still around, they wouldn’t be special, by virtue that they would be us.
Now, if there were any exclusively-male-line descendants around, that would be interesting, especially since they’d carry Jesus’ Y chromosome (which was presumably of miraculous origin of some form or another).
I tend to think that Alcmene (mother of Herakles) got either a much better or much worse deal than did Mary. In setting out to impregnate the former, Zeus shapechanged into a replica of her husband, whose name I forgot while typing this sentence, and coupled with her for about 72 hours straight, having ordered Helios to take a few days off so he could do the job right. So it was either 3 days of sweet, sweet loving (Barry White would surely be involved), or 3 days of utter brutality. I tend to think the former but you never know with Zeus.
ETA: My brain started working again. Alcmene’s husband was Amphitryon, and she bore a child by him at the same time she was pregnant with Herakles; this was Herakles’ twin, Iphikles. When asked how she knew which male fathered which child, Alcmene pointed out that only one of them had strangled cobras in the crip.
If Zeus had wanted to go the brutality route, he wouldn’t have bothered with the disguise. Given that he did, I’m pretty sure he didn’t intend brutality.
Then again, I can see him as the type who thinks he’s all that, but for whom all the ladies just fake orgasms so they can get him to just go away. In which case, even without his intent, it might have been pretty bad anyway.
I dunno. The episode with Callisto leads me to believe Zeus had some mad skills.
Moreover, though I’m not all that fond of him, he was still the father of Pallas so I shall not speak ill of him. 
Definitely.
Clean water was scarce. Many people would drink wine or beer or whatever alcoholic brew they had available.
But it’s quite possible to drink wine and beer regularly, and yet never get drunk. Especially when, as I believe was the case, wine for everyday consumption was weak by our standards, and indeed was often taken in watered form.
As other posts have shown, the culture of the day certainly knew that strong drink existed, and that it could make you drunk, and it didn’t regard getting drunk now and then as a big deal. Jesus could certainly have gotten drunk from time to time, and I imagine did. But that has nothing to do with everyday drinking. I drink wine every day which is probably stronger than everyday wine for Jesus, and I haven’t been drunk for years.