# "Did panic grip your soul?" NY Times Reviews Guy \[Fieri\]'s American Kitchen
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [November 14, 2012, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986 "2012-11-14T15:50:48Z")
**Posts on this page:** 11
**Page:** 6
### Author:  [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/101 "2012-11-17T00:00:10Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#):
>
> Bourdain is a fat, emasculated old man who still fancies himself as a bad ass, clearly having no idea how laughable he appears to the rest of the culinary world.
Fat? Really? The last I saw, he still looked not all that far afield from those heroin-infused days, complete with the self-described “concave chest.” And I think he knows full well what he’s become these days - last I recall, he devoted the better part of one episode of “No Reservations” to getting back behind the line in the kitchen and showcasing exactly how far out of practice he was, and bearing no illusions about that.
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### Author:  [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/102 "2012-11-17T00:02:02Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#):
>
> Bourdain may be an asshole, but he’s my kind of asshole. And I’d rather knock back a drink with him in Ghana, dining on rice and fish, listening to him wax heroine-addictecal about his edgy youth than to spend 2 minutes with Poochie, listening to him shouting “MONEY!” every time he slurps something into his bristly maw.
As I said, I know virtually nothing about Guy Fieri except for his carefully cultivated persona, which as many have pointed out above trumpets a loud & clear “Assclown Ahoy” message to anyone within 2 time zones, but Bourdain’s truly pathetic (and I use that word specifically, as I actually feel a degree of pity for him) Gourmet Gangster shtick at nearly 60 years old is even more offensive to my way of thinking.
He is like the 28 year-old ex high-school jock hanging around the football field, buying beer for the seniors and always trying to hit on that one chubby cheerleader with acne, all while constantly telling the same tired old stories of his exploits back when he was in school.
(I also fully believe that if the Anthony Bourdain of 25 years ago could see himself now, he would fully agree with everything I have said)
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### Author:  [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/103 "2012-11-17T00:02:08Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#):
>
> Bourdain may be an asshole, but he’s my kind of asshole. And I’d rather knock back a drink with him in Ghana, dining on rice and fish, listening to him wax heroine-addictecal about his edgy youth than to spend 2 minutes with Poochie, listening to him shouting “MONEY!” every time he slurps something into his bristly maw.
Can I feed both of them to the weasels and have a drink or three with Alton Brown or Aaron Sanchez instead?
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### Author:  [@GovernmentMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GovernmentMan)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/104 "2012-11-17T00:32:29Z")
> [@silenus](#):
>
> Can I feed both of them to the weasels and have a drink or three with Alton Brown or Aaron Sanchez instead?
Aaron Sanchez? Why would anyone want to drink with him?
And Alton Brown is a dork.
Personally, David Chang would be my first choice.
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### Author:  [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/105 "2012-11-17T00:35:47Z")
I don’t think I’d eat a single thing Chang cooked. Sanchez, OTOH, is my kind of chef. We’d be knocking back tequila and killing tastebuds with peppery dishes all night. And I **am** a dork, so Alton is God.
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### Author:  [@Rodgers01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodgers01)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/106 "2012-11-17T11:24:28Z")
> [@Heart\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> Yeah, the consensus is that he’s pretty much an all-around, unrepentant dick. [Here’s an article](http://www.citypages.com/2011-10-12/restaurants/guy-fieri-in-diners-drive-ins-and-disasters/) about DDD’s former producer, David Page. Neither he nor Guy come off looking like angels, but seriously:
> [@VinylTurnip](#):
>
> If you ever feel that sympathy creeping in again, just look at [this](http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/185fofogs8kzjjpg/original.jpg) and you’ll be fine.
:eek::eek::eek:
Okay - cured. The guy’s a **DOUCHE**! Now I can enjoy the review guilt-free. Thanks!
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/107 "2012-11-17T13:23:54Z")
Ouch. I’d heard this place “got a bad review”. This is, um…ouch.
OTOH, I smell an opportunity here: Kitchen Nightmares…go fix this mess! I want to see Ramsay and Fieri buttin’ spiky blond heads!
Or maybe Robert Irvine should tackle this one. Oooo-ooooh! I know! 3 Way Ego Challenge! Irvine and Ramsay \*compete \*to fix Fieri’s mess!
Somebody get Alton Brown on the phone.
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### Author:  [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/108 "2012-11-17T17:44:55Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#):
>
> As I said, I know virtually nothing about Guy Fieri except for his carefully cultivated persona, which as many have pointed out above trumpets a loud & clear “Assclown Ahoy” message to anyone within 2 time zones, but Bourdain’s truly pathetic (and I use that word specifically, as I actually feel a degree of pity for him) Gourmet Gangster shtick at nearly 60 years old is even more offensive to my way of thinking.
I won’t deny that Bourdain dances on the edge of self-satisfied smugness and have no idea how he’s perceived by his peers, but I like him. He can turn a decent phrase and has a quick wit, and many of the _No Reservations_ episodes were immensely entertaining.
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### Author:  [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/109 "2012-11-17T17:45:12Z")
> [@WhyNot](#):
>
> OTOH, I smell an opportunity here: Kitchen Nightmares…go fix this mess! I want to see Ramsay and Fieri buttin’ spiky blond heads!
>
> Or maybe Robert Irvine should tackle this one. Oooo-ooooh! I know! 3 Way Ego Challenge! Irvine and Ramsay \*compete \*to fix Fieri’s mess!
I’d watch that. Hell, I’d watch that on pay per view and buy the DVD.
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### Author:  [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/110 "2012-11-17T17:50:36Z")
> [@GovernmentMan](#):
>
> And Alton Brown is a dork.
I met Alton once…he came across as pretty sincere, and very funny. I think he’d be a great drinking companion.
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### Author:  [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2012, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-panic-grip-your-soul-ny-times-reviews-guy-fieri-s-american-kitchen/640986/111 "2012-11-17T18:00:44Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#):
>
> Whatever you may think of Guy Fieri, (whom I had never heard of until that game show he was on a couple of years back, but clearly his persona and affectations are that of a champion caliber uber-dooshbag) Anthony Bourdain is a sad, pathetic fucking joke of a man.
>
> Constantly, endlessly, shamelessly blathering on and on about the Bad Ol’ Days, back when he was a edgy, desperate junkie, with a passion for Cambodian heroin, back alley razor-blade fights, hardcore punk music and the perfectly prepared hollandaise sauce drizzled over blanched baby asparagus, served with pan-seared monkfish ever so lightly glazed with a maple-ginger reduction…:rolleyes:
>
> Bourdain is a fat, emasculated old man who still fancies himself as a bad ass, clearly having no idea how laughable he appears to the rest of the culinary world.
WTF? The guy is humbled when young cooks refer to him as chef. He’s the 2nd most self depricating guy in the world just behind Jon Stewart. And when he whores out for a credit card company, he totally owns up to whoring out.
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