# Did you accept you were going to be single forever? Were you right? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 3, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108 "2009-03-03T04:51:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/121 "2009-03-16T18:42:43Z")
I will be 41 soon. I’ve had a lot of bad relationships, one or two good ones, and one I would take back in a heartbeat. (It’s OBE - He’s happily married now, and I know I did the right thing at the time.) I suppose one would call it a “successful” dating life, 13 proposals, two engagements, no weddings. Barring that one time, the happiest, most productive and serene times of my life have always been when I was single. Now that I have the Celtling to care for, my life is completely fulfilling, not to mention simply FULL. I don’t have time for dating, and don’t think that’s how I’d choose to use the time if I had it. When I think of winning the lottery, and having that extra 50-some hours per week available, dating is just not on the list of things I imagine doing. ETA: Yes, and I hope so. ---
**Author:** ![Reply](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/reply/32/15952_2.png) [@Reply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reply)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/122 "2009-03-17T05:25:24Z")
> [@Reply](#): > > Christ, guys, I think you guys are the only ones taking my relationship situation more seriously than I am. I didn’t want to reply, but whatever, I’ll bite. On reflection, that was uncalled for and somewhat harsh. Sorry. I got defensive because I just (finally) got over some ladies and am, for possibly the first time in my life, finding some satisfaction in singledom… I was angry and afraid of what “not giving up” would entail. Anyway. Just wanted to apologize. ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/123 "2009-03-17T13:15:06Z")
I’m starting to think so. My boyfriend of nine years and I just broke up, and if I couldn’t be happy in that relationship, there’s a disctinct possibility that I can’t be happy in ANY relationship. This may just be immediate post-breakup angst, but the thought of being single for a good long time is very appealing. ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/124 "2009-03-17T19:10:22Z")
> [@AngelSoft](#): > > \I don’t like physical affection, I don’t like sex…\ Am I the only one whose attention this caught? If you don’t mind sharing, **AngelSoft** , would you please elaborate on these? Why don’t you like physical affection or sex? ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/125 "2009-03-17T19:13:55Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Not so much accept I’ll be single forever, as accept that it’s a plausible outcome and that I will not make a big deal of it. Couldn’t have said it better. Single, Male, 42. ---
**Author:** ![loser41](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@loser41](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/loser41)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2014, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/126 "2014-04-26T03:53:00Z")
At 41, I can accept being divorced and alone, my 8 year old son wants me to find a woman, it’s not going to happen, i’m either creepy or just too weird, been with younger women after the divorce, but no luck in the last few years, i’m ok with being alone, I have a few friends and just no luck with opposite sex, i’m just existing and I’m ok with that, I don’t really need to be with anyone, I was married and didn’t like it, so alone is good for me ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2014, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/127 "2014-04-26T04:19:51Z")
Since this thread was bumped, I’ll take this opportunity to update my post from page one. I was wrong. Re-connected with my college ex last year and we are in the process of intertwining our lives. I couldn’t be happier. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2014, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/128 "2014-04-26T09:03:20Z")
I, alas, am still alone. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2014, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108/129 "2014-04-26T17:10:21Z")
At some point in the past decade my feelings about being single went from panic, through despair, to acceptance, to massive relief, to downright exhilaration. Now I want a relationship as much as I want a kick in the head. I’m way too weird too function as part of a couple, and there’s no way am I putting myself or some other poor soul through that again. And it’s not going to change. The longer I stay single, the more set I become in my ways. I’m grateful for the relationships I did have. But I’m also very grateful that I don’t have to be in them in anymore. And trust me, so are my exes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-accept-you-were-going-to-be-single-forever-were-you-right/488108.md?page=6)