# Did you grow up in a traditional family?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [December 13, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960 "2012-12-13T21:13:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/1 "2012-12-13T21:13:39Z")
I heard an anti-SSM guy on the radio yesterday who claimed that “every study shows that children who grow up in a home with their two biological parents do better, and it’s the best situation for raising children.”
So, did you grow up in a home with your biological mother and father (no adoptees, no stepparents, no widow(er)s or single parents) until you left home?
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### Author:  [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/2 "2012-12-13T21:15:21Z")
Nope-Adopted.
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### Author:  [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/3 "2012-12-13T21:22:50Z")
The idea that only two generations is a traditional family is not traditional. I grew up in a traditional extended family where at times up to 4 generations were living in the same house or complex. That’s the true traditional family. My parents were there, but often not involved in my life because they were incompetent idiots.
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### Author:  [@Corcaigh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corcaigh)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/4 "2012-12-13T21:24:56Z")
Yup, both birth parents, who were married for over 50 years.
> [@](#):
>
> “… it’s the best situation for raising children.”
BS
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/5 "2012-12-13T21:28:28Z")
So traditional, it was almost Leave-It-To-Beaver - SAHM in the suburbs, Dad commuted into the city, visiting the grandparents most weekends. Oh yeah, and we walked five miles to school in the snow every day. Uphill. Both ways.
OK, that last part isn’t entirely accurate… 😃
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### Author:  [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/6 "2012-12-13T21:42:00Z")
It started out that way, but my parents eventually separated. It was never an ideal household, but it sucked a lot less _after_ the divorce.
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### Author:  [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/7 "2012-12-13T21:42:25Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#):
>
> The idea that only two generations is a traditional family is not traditional.
It’s traditional in the last century, but yeah, good point.
My family was about as traditional as it gets, and we turned out fine. But I knew a lot of people who didn’t have it so great in traditional families.
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### Author:  [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/8 "2012-12-13T21:43:36Z")
Yes. Mom, dad, sister, dog, white picket fence.
And I am one fucked up individual.
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### Author:  [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/9 "2012-12-13T21:52:34Z")
Yes, although both of my parents worked my entire childhood so I was in daycare a lot. My mom was part time and my dad fulltime until I was about 8 and then they switched. So while it’s a traditional family, my idea of gender roles is a bit funky. Dads go shopping, do the cleaning and make dinner. Moms come home at 5:30, sit down and go, “What a day! When’s dinner?” And of course, I turned out gay despite being the oldest kid.
edit: My mom is a research scientist and my dad is a social worker so he was the one we ran to as kids to be soothed and my mom was the rigid disciplinarian, these are the rules person.
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### Author:  [@FlyByNight512](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyByNight512)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/10 "2012-12-13T21:53:52Z")
Yes.
We would have been better off with just Mom around.
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/11 "2012-12-13T21:54:24Z")
Divorced parents, lived with mom, dad was around quite a bit though. Turned out pretty decent. Didn’t get married til I was in my early 30s cuz I didn’t want to fuck it up like my parents did.
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### Author:  [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/12 "2012-12-13T21:56:58Z")
Nope, I’m adopted. Grew up in a very stable two parent / one sibling family, very loved, very middle class.
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### Author:  [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/13 "2012-12-13T21:58:04Z")
It’s interesting that my sibling and I and all but one set of cousins grew up in traditional families - with their two bio parents married to each other - and they’ve all turned out as varying degrees of mildly messed up through to normal, but that one set of cousins whose parents divorced are more highly educated and more widely travelled than any other members of the family.
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### Author:  [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/14 "2012-12-13T22:00:17Z")
I had no idea, before opening this thread, that being adopted would make my family non-traditional.
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### Author:  [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/15 "2012-12-13T22:06:28Z")
Nope! My mother was a single mother for most of my childhood.
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### Author:  [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/16 "2012-12-13T22:06:29Z")
I did. It was very boring. But I don’t buy that it’s the inherently the best situation. It’s not the makeup of the family that makes it good, it’s the individuals.
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### Author:  [@lizlizliz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lizlizliz)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/17 "2012-12-13T22:06:30Z")
I was conceived via AI so according to these loons, probably not.
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### Author:  [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/18 "2012-12-13T22:25:45Z")
Yes- two married parents, one man and one woman, 4 kids, house in the suburbs, mom was SAHM, dad was home every night for dinner. Now that I’m grown, I’m the dad in the exact situation, but 2 kids instead of 4.
And as for whether I made out “better”? I’d argue against that. I made out fine but not necessarily better than my friends who were raised in “non traditional” households. I dispute that there was necessarily a causal relationship between the two.
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### Author:  [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/19 "2012-12-13T22:38:30Z")
I don’t even know how to answer this question. 95% of the time I did live in an outwardly “traditional” family- mom, dad, 3 kids… but also, my mom left my dad several times because he was abusive, and she even divorced him once for a couple of years, and then they got back together and are still together. So kind of? Life would have been much better for all of us if they hadn’t been together, though, so I can debunk that study.
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### Author:  [@Capt\_Kirk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt_Kirk)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2012, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/20 "2012-12-13T22:57:42Z")
Parents were Divorced before I was three, both remarried when I was five and are still married to this day some 37 years later. I have a step brother and sister, three half sisters at one point I had eight living grandparents and a bizarre spread of uncles, aunts and cousins. I have no idea whether this was good, bad or indifferent.
**Capt**
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