# Did you grow up in a traditional family? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 13, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960 "2012-12-13T21:13:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/41 "2012-12-14T02:11:07Z")
No, I was 4 at my mothers wedding to the man who would then be my father until he died last year. Except for him not being my bio dad, we were about as close to traditional as you can be. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/42 "2012-12-14T02:38:31Z")
Totally “traditional” as far as marital status went. But they fought like cats and dogs and never should have gotten married. My father did almost no parenting (except for yelling) and my mother did her level best to pass on her extremely repressed view of the world to her children. Took me years to undo that. Wish I’d grown up with a couple of hippie lesbian moms instead. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/43 "2012-12-14T02:56:49Z")
Nope. Parents divorced, dad completely out of the picture, raised by my mom and grandmother. I was better off not being around my dad, but it still fucked me up a bit. All things being equal I think it’s best to have a mom and a dad around, although lots of people that had a traditional family turn out awful and lots of people raised in my situation or similar turn out fine. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/44 "2012-12-14T03:13:47Z")
Yes. Pretty much. In my world in the 1960s and 1970s pretty much everyone grew up in a traditional family. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/45 "2012-12-14T03:15:37Z")
Rockwellian until my parents separated when I was 16, they got back together and stayed together just until I graduated HS, but that was it. The rest of the family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, were about as traditional as they come. ---
**Author:** ![April\_R](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/46 "2012-12-14T03:19:11Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > It started out that way, but my parents eventually separated. It was never an ideal household, but it sucked a lot less _after_ the divorce. I second this. My parents split when I was 16 and I was never happier. I am determined to make my own marriage work despite my bad example growing up. ---
**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/47 "2012-12-14T03:27:53Z")
I checked yes, but maybe it should have been no, since I’m adopted. But I was adopted essentially pre-birth, and went home with my adoptive parents (who I consider my real parents) at 4 days old. I had older sisters, and my folks stayed married to each other until parted by death. That’s about as normal as it gets, other than not sharing genes. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/48 "2012-12-14T03:28:57Z")
Yes. And we all known how well adjusted I am. ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/49 "2012-12-14T03:33:17Z")
Mom, Dad, 3 boys and a menagerie of various critters on an acreage outside of town. A few years ago I was going through a book of baby names arranged demographically rather than alphabetically and under the heading “1950s Suburban Ranch” was my name and my two brothers’, right in the top 10. So I changed my name. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/50 "2012-12-14T03:33:59Z")
Sort of. I mean my Dad was an army officer and he was routinely transferred to non family posts. Living seperatly from him, often with the grand parents was quite regular. I was 17 when my father moved back home for the last time. Parents married 30 years. 1 sister. I suppose you can call it traditional as they remained married. But, I hesitate to call moving to the four corners of the world, and long stretches of living apart; traditional. ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/51 "2012-12-14T03:44:09Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > So, did you grow up in a home with your biological mother and father (no adoptees, no stepparents, no widow(er)s or single parents) until you left home? Not past a certain point, no. My folks divorced ~my 3rd grade year and I lived with my mother for about ~four years ( with first a girlfriend, then a boyfriend for much of that time ). Then with my father w/ a stepmother and two stepbrothers about my age more or less until I moved out. Am I well-adjusted? Eh, I get by ;). ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/52 "2012-12-14T04:05:51Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > So traditional, it was almost Leave-It-To-Beaver - SAHM in the suburbs, Dad commuted into the city, visiting the grandparents most weekends. Oh yeah, and we walked five miles to school in the snow every day. Uphill. Both ways. > > OK, that last part isn’t entirely accurate… 😃 Lol, it sorta is for me 😃 It was just under two miles one way, and two miles was the cut-off points for busses. Also, we lived in the Fox River Valley. We lived on the east side, the school was on the west side, so we did, indeed, walk uphill both ways. In the snow, lots and lots and lots. :p:p:p The rest is pretty identical to yours, whilst we lived outside Chicago at least. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/53 "2012-12-14T08:42:29Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > Not past a certain point, no. My folks divorced ~my 3rd grade year and I lived with\*\*\* my mother for about \*\*\*~four years ( with _ **first a girlfriend, then a boyfriend** _ for much of that time ). Then with my father w/ a stepmother and two stepbrothers about my age more or less until I moved out. > > Am I well-adjusted? Eh, I get by ;). Pray do tell.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Devoted](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/53a042/32.png) [@Devoted](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Devoted)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/54 "2012-12-14T09:03:18Z")
I raised 3 wonderful kids on my own …all went t Uni and did better than all the kids in two parent . We pulled together…I worked two jobs gave them all I never had they worked paper routes to contribute and I took them on their rounds when I could. I made sure they never went without. I worked hard to get good degrees and be a good role model…never drank or smoked. I loved them and encouraged them and they knew all we had was each other first and foremost. I took them to church. Now my son is a manager and my second daughter is studying Law, the youngest wants to be a University lecturer and we are still a family who support and love each other. They respect me and I respect them. I had to be strong and not be their friend when they were growing up…I was the parent with authority. Most parent now try to be friends and not make decision and give direction and give their kids informed choices. I gave all those to my kids and allowed them to make their mistake and then stood by them as they picked up the pieces. I never allowed them to lay around…they always had chores and responsibilities for each other too. Leaders are made by daily guidance people lets remember that. Money does not make them. Spoiling them does not work too. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/55 "2012-12-14T10:15:44Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I heard an anti-SSM guy on the radio yesterday who claimed that “every study shows that children who grow up in a home with their two biological parents do better, and it’s the best situation for raising children.” That is an outright lie. Don’t these people know that God forbids lying? (One of the Ten Commandments is; “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor"") And yes, you also lie when you spread a lie without checking it, especially when it would take you two minutes to do so. Here’s the Wikipedia article on [LGBT parenting](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_parenting). > [@](#): > > Scientific research has been generally consistent in showing that gay and lesbian parents are as fit and capable as heterosexual parents, and their children are as psychologically healthy and well-adjusted as children reared by heterosexual parents.[3][4][5] Major associations of mental health professionals in the U.S., Canada, and Australia have not identified credible empirical research that suggests otherwise.[5][6][7][8][9] Based on the robust nature of the evidence available in the field, the Third District Court of Appeal of the State of Florida was satisfied in 2010 that the issue is so far beyond dispute that it would be irrational to hold otherwise, and concluded that the best interests of children are not preserved by prohibiting homosexual adoption.[10] ---
**Author:** ![gracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@gracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gracer)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/56 "2012-12-14T10:19:54Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > That is an outright lie. Don’t these people know that God forbids lying? (One of the Ten Commandments is; “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor"") And yes, you also lie when you spread a lie without checking it, especially when it would take you two minutes to do so. > > Here’s the Wikipedia article on [LGBT parenting](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_parenting). This is such a good counter point. I’m going to remember that for future bigoted garbage spouters! ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/57 "2012-12-14T10:30:45Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I heard an anti-SSM guy on the radio yesterday who claimed that “every study shows that children who grow up in a home with their two biological parents do better, and it’s the best situation for raising children.” This is _always_ the assumed position of the anti-gay crowd, backed up with zero evidence. In actual fact, a number of studies, [such as this one](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/6574238/Lesbians-make-better-parents-says-senior-parenting-official.html), suggest that lesbian couples make better parents than one man-one woman. We are the chosen ones. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/58 "2012-12-14T13:57:30Z")
My parents were married and divorced before I turned 1 year old. My Mom had a string of boyfriends and marriages (4 marriages total, all ending in divorce) and I stopped seeing my alcoholic father when I was 13. So no, I did not grow up in a traditional family. And yeah, I was messed up for a long time. Don’t think that proves anything about the general trend, though. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/59 "2012-12-14T14:15:15Z")
Nope. Adopted. ---
**Author:** ![bahimes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@bahimes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bahimes)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2012, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960/60 "2012-12-14T14:41:40Z")
Another sort of. Both parents, never divorced. I’m the oldest of five with a brother 3 years younger. Then a Papal Encyclical ensued and sister was born 7 years later. Then another Papal Encyclical (or was it a Bull?) and two more brothers 14 and 15 years younger. Couple of years after that, i dodged the draft and joined the Navy. So it was sort of a "traditional family). The two youngest both dead, now, the sister with advanced degree a christian SAHM, Surviving brother multiple advanced degrees. Adjusted? Many times.😕 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-you-grow-up-in-a-traditional-family/643960.md?page=4)