# Did your parents limit what you were allowed to read growing up? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 27, 2010, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650 "2010-06-27T00:49:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/61 "2010-06-28T04:50:17Z")
My (very Catholic) mother discovered that I had checked “the Exorcist” out from the local library and returned it. I was ten at the time. She also forbade us from watching the TV shows “Soap”, for its’ randy content, and “Maude”, ostensibly because she thought it was a dumb show, but I have a hunch it was that abortion episode that riled her up. Also, we couldn’t watch “the Love Boat” or “Fantasy Island” because she thought they were moronic. (OK, nowadays I do agree she was right in the last two shows.) ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/62 "2010-06-28T14:40:58Z")
My father never had the slightest idea what I was reading. My mother made sure I was allowed full access to the library from the time I could read, and after she died my father paid no attention. I think I checked out _Helter Skelter_ when I was 10 or so. I wasn’t really interested in anything dirty, but one time I was maybe 12 I was asked to go to a neighbor’s house to babysit their infant for a few hours. I knew nothing whatever about babies, but they assured me I didn’t have to do anything, just stay and make sure nothing bad happened. (?) They had a copy of _The Happy Hooker_, so I read that. I think that was the one where the author has poolside sex with a German shepherd. Didn’t hear a peep out of the baby. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/63 "2010-06-28T18:02:06Z")
I read everything I could get my hands on, including a lot of stuff that my mom had stored in the basement or the closet of my room. Some of it she probably wouldn’t have been thrilled to know I got my hands on, but mostly I got away with whatever I wanted to read. Sex seemed to be a bigger deal than violence, since I know I busted into _The Shining_, followed by a bunch more Stephen King, when I was pretty young, which didn’t bother her, but when \*Rose Madder \*came out, that was one she didn’t want to pass on to me when she was finished (I would have been 12). The only time she ever actually took a book away from me was when she saw me reading her copy of _The Handmaid’s Tale_. I was frustrated by that one for quite a while. I think I was somewhere in the 8-10 range, since she said I could have it back when I was 12, and I remember it was at least a couple years away. Never had any problem checking books out from the adult section of the library, though. I still miss having a children’s card–up to the age of 15, there were _no late fees_. You’d have to replace anything you lost, but as long as you eventually brought it back, the slate was wiped clean. Especially useful for a kid who spent a lot of her summers shuttling back and forth between the library and her homes with a big backpack on foot and, later, on a bike–I’d sometimes get sidetracked and not get through all half-dozen, dozen, or more books in the allotted few weeks. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/64 "2010-06-28T19:22:35Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > I just wanted to say that I am so, so grateful that grounding me from reading must have never occurred to my parents- that would have been the worst punishment ever! My mom tried it once, but couldn’t make it stick…I was not able to not read! Besides, I think she realized that stopping your kid from reading is just ridiculous. I was allowed to read anything I wanted as a child. However, when I was a teenager, Grandma confiscated my Satanic Bible several times (forcing me to buy it again and again), and lamented the fact that she had let me read all those witchcraft books, such as The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/65 "2010-06-28T19:50:01Z")
At one point, my mother realized that sending me to my room really wasn’t that big a deal as a punishment, because all I really wanted to do was sit inside and read, anyway. So there was one time that she carted all my books out into the hallway when she grounded me. That took forever, though, so I think she only tried it the one time. > [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > and lamented the fact that she had let me read all those witchcraft books, such as The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe. … :smack: ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/66 "2010-06-28T20:44:35Z")
> [@Krokodil](#): > > I’m confused; by “down there” are you referring to her bikini wax or her leg warmers? The studio freaked out when they realized that Dan O’Bannon planned on having Quigley do her dance _completely_ naked and insisted on her wearing a “prosthetic pelvis” to cover her crotch making her look like a doll or the woman on the Voyager space plaque down there. ---
**Author:** ![grayhairedmomma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/47e85d/32.png) [@grayhairedmomma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grayhairedmomma)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/67 "2010-06-28T20:59:07Z")
My mom never restricted my reading although she would caution me about reading Harlequin romances. She said they would give me a messed up view of life and to a certain extent she was right. But they were books and I read everything I could get my hands on back then. I do and have restricted my daughter’s reading. Her reading skills have far outpaced her emotional development. She’s now 13 and just catching up to herself. But for a couple of years it was huge challenge finding books she could read that were stimulating and well written, but didn’t include themes she wasn’t ready to deal with. I do still keep an eye on what she checks out and what she wants to buy, but now I let her read all but the most hardcore or depraved things. Luckily for me, she always wants me to read what she’s reading and I’m not shy about bringing up topics that I think she might need a little help understanding. ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/68 "2010-06-28T22:38:52Z")
We weren’t restricted from reading much of anything as long as it wasn’t porn (and even then, when the parental units were out, we found the porn stash.) At one point when I was about 15 and my sister 12 my mother told us not to read _Lady Chatterly’s Lover_ because it wasn’t a book for kids. So as soon as she turned her back we found her copy and started looking through it. Later when we told her about this she told us about reverse psychology. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/69 "2010-06-28T22:49:32Z")
> [@The New and Improved Superman](#): > > My (very Catholic) mother discovered that I had checked “the Exorcist” out from the local library and returned it. I was ten at the time. > > She also forbade us from watching the TV shows “Soap”, for its’ randy content, and “Maude”, ostensibly because she thought it was a dumb show, but I have a hunch it was that abortion episode that riled her up. Also, we couldn’t watch “the Love Boat” or “Fantasy Island” because she thought they were moronic. (OK, nowadays I do agree she was right in the last two shows.) I just realized why Mom forbade us to watch _Maude_. (_Soap_ was obvious.) I got forbidden to read things in at least two different senses. One was that there was a whole load of subjects judged inappropriate; I got grounded for relating the theory of evolution, f’instance. And, like **Shot from Guns** , my books would get confiscated when I was grounded, as I was always more interested in reading than TV. (Once I got forced to go outside and play, which was bad for the neighborhood kids as I took my frustrations out on them.) I have related ere this how my teenage cousin is no longer allowed to own any science fiction, fantasy, philosophy, or non-creationist science books. ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/70 "2010-06-28T23:11:38Z")
Good gods no. My parents encouraged me to read anything and everything I could get my hands on and never judged. One week I’d be reading Crime and Punishment, the next it was the latest in whatever adventure or Western series I was into, etc. As long as I wasn’t bringing home Beeline porn novels, they didn’t care; they were just thrilled that I loved to read. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2010, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/71 "2010-06-28T23:47:15Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Terrible, actually. I can see about 6 inches in front of my nose, uncorrected. Yes, that’s about exactly the distance my book sits when I lie on my side reading in bed. I’ve often wondered if the position of the book, rather than the flashlight, led to my myopia, or affected the distance of my best vision somehow. Does it run in your family? An elementary school teacher taught this to me: lay the book down with whatever overhead light you have shining directly on it. Angle the book so the light is reflected by the book into your face. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/72 "2010-06-29T00:13:57Z")
> [@Superhal](#): > > Does it run in your family? > > An elementary school teacher taught this to me: lay the book down with whatever overhead light you have shining directly on it. Angle the book so the light is reflected by the book into your face. Yes it does, so I can’t really pin it on the reading in bed. My eyesight’s a great deal worse than my father’s, but about the same as my mother’s. And despite her cultivating a love of books in me, she’s never read in bed (or low light) much. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/73 "2010-06-29T00:20:02Z")
I don’t remember my parents reviewing what I read at all, except for “fancy name” books they could name drop, like when I read a bunch of Shakespeare’s plays (_Romeo and Juliet_, _Macbeth_) in fifth grade (with, ahem, less than 100% comprehension in retrospect, but yet more than zero, and reading it at a younger age probably may have helped me to internalize some of the Elizabethan grammar, making later reading easier). Left unnoted was my tearing through all 14 of the then-extant books in Piers Anthony’s _Xanth_ series in a week one summer when I was 13 _facepalm_, or going on to read fairly graphic works of his like his _Tarot_ trilogy when I was 14. As a parent myself, I try to keep an eye out though. For example I remember being somewhat shocked to see what looked like a 12 or 13 year old girl in the SF aisle of my local Barnes and Noble the other day reading _Stone of Tears_, the second book in the Sword of Truth series by Terry Goodkind. I read the first 6 or so books in that series and whatever else I think of the way those books ended up going (and there is a lot), there are also a lot of very graphic scenes of violent sexual abuse and torture in just about all of them, and I don’t like the idea of my daughter reading them just yet (who turns 12 next year). I hope that’s not hypocritical (or sexist). ---
**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/74 "2010-06-29T00:57:17Z")
> [@grayhairedmomma](#): > > My mom never restricted my reading although she would caution me about reading Harlequin romances. She said they would give me a messed up view of life and to a certain extent she was right. But they were books and I read everything I could get my hands on back then. > > I do and have restricted my daughter’s reading. Her reading skills have far outpaced her emotional development. She’s now 13 and just catching up to herself. But for a couple of years it was huge challenge finding books she could read that were stimulating and well written, but didn’t include themes she wasn’t ready to deal with. I do still keep an eye on what she checks out and what she wants to buy, but now I let her read all but the most hardcore or depraved things. Luckily for me, she always wants me to read what she’s reading and I’m not shy about bringing up topics that I think she might need a little help understanding. Are you willing to elaborate more about the themes and emotional outpacing you refer to? I just find it interesting that you decided to restrict your daughter when you were not restricted yourself. I’m also trying to think back to when I was 13 and trying (and failing) to imagine my parents intervening even if it was supposed to be for my own good. ---
**Author:** ![Huerta88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/82dd89/32.png) [@Huerta88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Huerta88)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/75 "2010-06-29T01:23:02Z")
Not really, to the OP, though television and movies were pretty heavily stepped on for “inappropriateness” (usually language or sexual content, not that there was much of either on explicit view in those broadcast-only days (no cable)). Some of it was on a borderline of sexual innuendo that also amounted to stupid unfunny bad taste (Three’s Company or the Newlywed Show are obvious examples), so I can’t fault them for exclusively prudish motives . . . ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/76 "2010-06-29T02:49:24Z")
Not usually, although oddly enough, I remember that my mother absolutely _freaked_ when she caught me reading a book called _How to Comfort the Dying Child_ at the library once. (I was about seven, I think, and at the I-want-to-be-a-doctor stage where I read everything in the medical section of the library.) I’ve always thought that was rather revealing – my very liberal parents didn’t get freaked out by any subject matter _except_ death. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/77 "2010-06-29T10:17:08Z")
Other than Mom having strange problems with some comic strips and comic books, no. Freaked out when she discovered I was reading “adults only” (for political reasons which totally escaped me) newspaper strips, freaked out again upon seeing me with a Thor, freaked out some more because she heard American comic books were “boys stuff” - this last one got Dad to go “:dubious: didn’t you use to read Capitán Trueno when you were her age?” Yeah, she did, but apparently this was “different”. Dad wouldn’t have none of that kind of logic, though, so I was allowed to go on reading Spiderman. TV was heavily censored at home, but books weren’t. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/78 "2010-06-29T11:19:12Z")
My mother put restrictions on just about _everything_ I was allowed to do. I never even saw a “Rated R” movie until I saw _Carrie_ at age 15! My father, however. . .my father believed there was no such thing as _bad_ reading. When I was 14, there was a movie I wanted to see, something about reincarnation. I _think_ it was _The Reincarnation of Peter Proud_. Anyway, since I wasn’t allowed to see R-rated movies, my father went out (without my Mom’s knowledge) and bought me the book! 😛 He handed it to me when Mom wasn’t in the room, and said, in typical Daddy fashion “Here ya go, pal”. I do remember that I stayed up _all night_ reading the book, even though I knew it would make school _really_ rough the next day. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/79 "2010-06-29T14:08:32Z")
I don’t think it would’ve even occcured to my parents to censor books. TV - yes, Movies - yes but books no way. Though she wasn’t thrilled when I’d read the _Daily Worker_ at the library. I’m raising a little Communist she’d yell. My mother was from Yugoslavia and very anti-communist. But she let me read it and then she’d explain all the lies in it 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2010, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650/80 "2010-06-29T14:29:59Z")
It just occurred to me that _I_ put restrictions on my baby sister’s movie-watching. She’s a good deal younger than me, and I frequently had baby-sitting duty; she was once very annoyed that I wouldn’t let her wtach Terminator. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/did-your-parents-limit-what-you-were-allowed-to-read-growing-up/544650.md?page=5)