# Diplomatic way to say "Excuse me, may I speak to a White person?" **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 2, 2009, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006 "2009-11-02T01:35:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/41 "2009-11-02T18:06:16Z")
I understand the issue of communication over the phone, but in person, I would write down the code I was asking about and show it to her. This gives her a more complete view than just a keyword, and allows you to ask a focused question based on that example. It also allows a third place to focus rather than looking at each other uncomprehendingly. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/42 "2009-11-02T18:36:30Z")
> [@Serenata67](#): > > Accents are hard. I’m sure the person you’re talking to has had issues with not understanding other people’s accents. As long as you phrase it nicely, politely and use a tone of voice that isn’t condescending or demeaning, no offense should be taken. It shouldn’t, but it still might be. I used to go to a haircutting school to get cheap haircuts, and after a bad experience with a non-English speaker who cut six inches off my hair when I just wanted a trim because she didn’t understand what I was asking for, next time I went I politely asked for a student who spoke good English. You would have thought I asked them to all take a big smelly dump on the desk - they practically called the Hate Speech Police and had me arrested. It was a miserable experience for everyone, and I didn’t go back there again. I’m older now, and if the same thing happened again, I’d probably have a chat with them about how if you’re going to train people to cut hair in Calgary, a requirement of speaking English well enough to take haircutting instruction is not optional or racist. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/43 "2009-11-03T00:33:48Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > No, it will confuse them because chances are they self-identify as Aryan. Well _there’s_ your problem—you need to specify _Alpine_-Aryan and not _Indic_-Aryan! I mean, I know you can’t just expect to find Yamato or even _Nordic_-Aryans on demand, but you can’t just settle for a crude general identifier in your personnel request. That’s just nutty. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/44 "2009-11-03T00:43:52Z")
\ ***Whew** ^! I’m sure glad it lightened up in here a little!🙂 It **did** , right?😉 Quasi ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/45 "2009-11-03T02:58:27Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > If you have questions about code, just ask us. I shall, thanks!!! hh ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/46 "2009-11-03T06:06:53Z")
> [@jali](#): > > This isn’t nice at all. I hate ugliness like this. I know. Cracking on someone who has to go to community college in their 50s is so much worse than assuming a white person has more command of the English language than someone with darker skin and slanty eyes. ---
**Author:** ![DanBlather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@DanBlather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DanBlather)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/47 "2009-11-03T06:31:04Z")
A friend of mine (a non-native Enlish speaker) told me about a class he took in economics. The TA’s accent made if impossible to determine if he was saying “micro” or “macro”. So a typical sentence would be “in \*mecroeconomics \*such and such, but in _mecroeconomics_ something else”. ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/48 "2009-11-03T12:12:11Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > I know. Cracking on someone who has to go to community college in their 50s is so much worse than assuming a white person has more command of the English language than someone with darker skin and slanty eyes. The difference is that the OP was being sarcastic. It was a joke, even if _you_ didn’t get it. Your comment, on the other hand, was just a rude, mean-spirited dig at the OP. Not funny, and clearly not intended to be funny. That’s the real difference. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/49 "2009-11-03T14:46:02Z")
> [@Grapefruit](#): > > A long time ago when I was working at a family-owned restaurant at a small airport, we’d often get American tourists coming in. The owner hired a lot of immigrants to work the kitchen and mostly kept fluent English speakers (like me, who is Asian by ethnicity, but grew up culturally Canadian) in the front. Sometimes, we’d be short on front counter staff and the ESL workers would come out to help out. One day, my co-worker was dealing with a guy and it looked like she was having a little trouble understanding him. She waved me over to help out. He took a look at me and said “You better talk good English!” and I responded with “Yes sir. I speak English very well.” I love stuff like that. Like a when customer stands at my teller window, taking forever to fill out their transaction slips (or doesn’t have any at all) and then complains that they’re in a hurry, so I’d better go fast. The best was this: I had a customer at my window who had some overdraft fees and we were talking about why he was overdrawn, by how much, etc. I was helping him figure it out, so it took a little bit. When we were done, the customer waiting in line immediately tore into me about how long it was taking and how he didn’t have time to wait for people who don’t care about their money, etc. (He didn’t over hear the conversation, but he could tell I was explaining something because we were both bent over a sheet of paper, talking for a while, as I pointed things out.) Anyway, he was complaining about people who don’t care about their money… and whaddya know? He’s overdrawn and wants me to explain why he’s overdrawn… he doesn’t have time for people who don’t care about their money, unless it’s him. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/50 "2009-11-03T14:49:32Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > Well _there’s_ your problem—you need to specify _Alpine_-Aryan and not _Indic_-Aryan! I mean, I know you can’t just expect to find Yamato or even _Nordic_-Aryans on demand, but you can’t just settle for a crude general identifier in your personnel request. That’s just nutty. Perhaps we could use a color wheel. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/51 "2009-11-03T16:10:45Z")
I always feign a bad connection and communicate with my co-workers via IM instead. That’s not always an option for everyone, but I’m sure glad I have it! ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/52 "2009-11-03T22:39:02Z")
> [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](#): > > Right, because “White” = “Speaks American English clearly” :rolleyes: When I finally got transferred from the guy in India or wherever who had never heard of iTunes, I was so glad to hear what was clearly an American Black Guy. We saved a lot of time by not going off track all the time, and he knew a lot more than the first level people. ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/53 "2009-11-04T06:26:42Z")
> [@ZenBeam](#): > > The difference is that the OP was being sarcastic. It was a joke, even if _you_ didn’t get it. > > Your comment, on the other hand, was just a rude, mean-spirited dig at the OP. Not funny, and clearly not intended to be funny. > > That’s the real difference. Aw did I hurt someone’s feelings? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/54 "2009-11-04T10:19:22Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > \*\*What would YOU do? \*\* > > Study, work hard, and get good enough grades that you don’t end up in a Community College in your 50s. Reported. I’m getting tired of this. ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/55 "2009-11-04T11:13:36Z")
> [@handsomeharry](#): > > She, small, Asian, female… Yeah, and is she hot? I guess not as you wouldn’t be complaining about her lack of english skills otherwise (or at least I wouldn’t). ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/56 "2009-11-04T22:50:48Z")
Or has someone _already_ replied that those folks are just trying to make a living and it isn’t their fault we cannot understand them. Again, **hh** was making a joke, and yes, it _is_ tough dealing with someone who doesn’t speak perfect English, but things are as they are and we have to work around them sometimes. My wife and I have both had to deal with “out-sourced” tech help, and although it’s frustrating (and time-consuming) we “deal with it”. I wonder how people in the so-called “Third World” countries feel about our private contractors who don’t speak _their_ language fluently? And yes, I know many of them speak English. Again, sorry if this has been discussed, but we need to see the other side of the coin too. Q ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/57 "2009-11-05T00:07:06Z")
The other side of the coin is that if your job requires you to be able to communicate clearly in English, if you can’t do that, you shouldn’t have that job. Somehow we have developed into a couple of nations where this very basic fact has been turned into racism. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/58 "2009-11-05T00:09:38Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > The other side of the coin is that if your job requires you to be able to communicate clearly in English, if you can’t do that, you shouldn’t have that job. Somehow we have developed into a couple of nations where this very basic fact has been turned into racism. Sounds like something a racist would say. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/59 "2009-11-05T00:13:41Z")
Then those folks need to be taught to _enunciate_ which takes up even more time, because it slows the whole thing down. I am sorry if anyone thinks it’s racism. I just think it’s a language barrier, nothing more. **hh**? I for one thank you for this thread, light-hearted, satirical or not. We have ALL faced this problem and been aggravated by it. All you did was call it to our attention.🙂 Again: We just have to deal with it. We’ve dealt with worse. Q ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006/60 "2009-11-05T00:14:16Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Sounds like something a racist would say. Como say what ? :rolleyes: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/diplomatic-way-to-say-excuse-me-may-i-speak-to-a-white-person/516006.md?page=4)