# Dirtiest line I can remember in any mainstream film **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 6, 2017, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620 "2017-09-06T08:27:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/21 "2017-09-06T16:58:04Z")
> [@bobkitty](#): > > Loki: “This is my bargain, you mewling quim!” Winner! ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/22 "2017-09-06T17:02:30Z")
> [@Smid](#): > > From Pump Up The Volume: > > Mark Hunter: I’ve got something to show you. > Nora: Is it bigger than a baby’s arm? This reminds me of a line from the 2004 “King Arthur” (the one with Clive Owen and Keira Knightley): Bors: “Well, now that we’re free men, I’m gonna drink 'tll I can’t piss straight.” Gawain: “You do that every night.” Bors: “I never could piss straight. Too much of myself to handle down there…” [looks at the Knights] Bors: “Well, it’s a problem! No really, it is. It’s a problem. It’s like…” All the Knights, in unison: “…a baby’s arm holding an apple.” ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/23 "2017-09-06T17:04:11Z")
> [@SlackerInc](#): > > I’ve seen this movie, but I don’t remember what you mean. > [@madsircool](#): > > Its in the IMDB quotes section iirc. I think he’s referring to this: Meadows: [looking at porn] Are they really doing that when they take that picture? Buddusky: [pause] Well kid, there’s more things in this life than you can possibly imagine. I knew a whore once in Wilmington. She had a glass eye… used to take it out and wink people off for a dollar. > [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > “My God, I haven’t been fucked like that since grade school.” > > - Fight Club Which replaced this, which the director wanted cut and a new line written: “I want to have your abortion.” ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/24 "2017-09-06T19:43:42Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > Which replaced this, which the director wanted cut and a new line written: > “I want to have your abortion.” The grade school line is funnier. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/25 "2017-09-06T20:16:05Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > The grade school line is funnier. I think it is as well. The abortion line is crude and shocking, the grade school line is crude, shocking, and funny. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/26 "2017-09-06T20:17:51Z")
From _South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut:_ “What the heck is a rim job?” “Why, that’s where you put your legs behind your head and let someone lick your ass.” > [@Munch](#): > > Which replaced this, which the director wanted cut and a new line written: > “I want to have your abortion.” Nitpick: it was actually Laura Ziskin, President of Fox 200 Pictures, who objected to the “abortion” line and demanded that it be changed. When David Fincher came up with the “grade school” line, she was aghast as she felt it was much worse, and insisted that the line be changed back. However, Fincher refused. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/27 "2017-09-06T21:56:21Z")
Two lines you probably don’t remember because they’ve been edited out of almost every version of the films. Sonny Corleone in _The Godfather_: “Hey, listen, I want somebody good - and I mean very good - to plant that gun. I don’t want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hands, alright?” Lili von Shtupp in _Blazing Saddles_: “Is it twue what they say about the way you people are. . . gifted? (Pause) Oh, it’s TWUE! It’s TWUE!” Sheriff Bart: “Excuse me, you’re sucking on my arm.” ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/28 "2017-09-06T21:58:09Z")
Just because it’s [delivered by sweet ol’ Betty White](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0139414/quotes): “If I had a dick, this is where I’d tell you to suck it.” ---
**Author:** ![Yodalicious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yodalicious/32/8195_2.png) [@Yodalicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yodalicious)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/29 "2017-09-06T22:01:51Z")
From Kingsmen: The Secret Service Gary ‘Eggsy’ Unwin: Sorry, love. Gotta save the world. Princess Tilde: [In a thick, Swedish accent] If you save the world, we can do it in the… asshole. Gary ‘Eggsy’ Unwin: [Calmly] I will be right back. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/30 "2017-09-06T22:03:48Z")
Subtlety from _Animal Crackers_, with Margaret Dumont and Groucho Marx: Mrs. Rittenhouse: “The storm has put the lights out, and you can’t see your hand before your face.” Spalding: “Well, you wouldn’t get much enjoyment out of that.” ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/31 "2017-09-06T22:12:59Z")
There’s a line in “Monsters, Inc.” that I couldn’t believe got past the censors, because it’s a kids’ movie. One of them says something like “I need to milk my yak, but unfortunately, I always get hairs in my teeth.” 😕 :eek: And there’s also a line in “Inside Out” where the little girl insists that there are no bears in San Francisco. :o ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/32 "2017-09-06T22:14:52Z")
Bond films can get pretty dirty considering they’re only PG-13 \ _I thought Christmas only came once a year?_ ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2017, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/33 "2017-09-06T22:45:38Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > Two lines you probably don’t remember because they’ve been edited out of almost every version of the films. > > Sonny Corleone in _The Godfather_: > “Hey, listen, I want somebody good - and I mean very good - to plant that gun. I don’t want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hands, alright?” > > Lili von Shtupp in _Blazing Saddles_: > “Is it twue what they say about the way you people are. . . gifted? (Pause) Oh, it’s TWUE! It’s TWUE!” > **Sheriff Bart: “Excuse me, you’re sucking on my arm.”** The bolded line has never been in any released version of _Blazing Saddles_. Mel talked about it with me (and about 500 others) in July. Unless he included the line on the DVD and forgot. ---
**Author:** ![SigMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SigMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SigMan)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/34 "2017-09-07T00:37:30Z")
Hard to top this: [https://s25.postimg.org/je9qi3kin/mae-west.jpg](https://postimages.org/) ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/35 "2017-09-07T00:54:37Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > The bolded line has never been in any released version of _Blazing Saddles_. Mel talked about it with me (and about 500 others) in July. Unless he included the line on the DVD and forgot. Who am I to argue with Mel Brooks? Even so, I’ll stand by the first part of the line for this thread. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/36 "2017-09-07T00:58:18Z")
From the outtakes to “Grumpy Old Men”: Looks like Chuck’s taking the skin boat to tuna town! ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/37 "2017-09-07T03:08:31Z")
From _42nd Street_, in 1933: Chorus girl to another chorus girl who’s sitting on a man’s lap: “What are you sitting on?” Other chorus girl: “A flagpole, I think.” ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/38 "2017-09-07T03:56:17Z")
“Mother pus bucket” ---
**Author:** ![JpnDude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/838e76/32.png) [@JpnDude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JpnDude)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/39 "2017-09-07T04:33:10Z")
From **Heathers** , "Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa? " ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2017, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620/40 "2017-09-07T05:40:33Z")
From this week’s Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern. They are chowing down on freshly killed rattlesnake (they also showed Andrew chopping the head off to kill it, no cut away) and he says, “How can anything so dangerous taste so good?” One of the locals replies, “I know a few women like that”. They are making the show much tougher it appears. They also showed a calf being butchered and one guy reaches into the freshly opened chest cavity and just flings guts everywhere as the stomach explodes. Dennis [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-line-i-can-remember-in-any-mainstream-film/795620.md?page=3)