# Dirtiest Songs (Possibly NSFW) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 25, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947 "2009-06-25T16:19:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/41 "2009-06-26T00:23:48Z")
Well, I always thought “Chica Mi Tipo” by Sublime was pretty raunchy, until I read some of the other entries in this thread. Goodness! _vapors_ So she told me to come over and I took that trip And then she pulled out my mushroom tip and when it came out it went -drip drip drip- I didn’t know she had the GI Joe Kung Fu Grip Perhaps we’ll call it the dirtiest song in my collection, or the dirtiest 90’s punk/reggae fusion. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/42 "2009-06-26T00:30:24Z")
_Dinah Moe Hum_ by Frank Zappa. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/43 "2009-06-26T00:56:00Z")
> [@shefDave](#): > > Ghostface Killah’s verse from _The Projects_ is, well, … > > Suck my dick it’s the kid with the fat knob > I bust all into ya face, plus it come in globs > Quick get on your knees, with yo’ sweet pussy let it breathe > Two fingers is all in your hole, think I can fit three > Your pink lips, spread it in shit, let me throw my dick in > Grab my shit and place it gently, on your clit > Ping-pong pussy, wide world of wombs titty saggin > Stomach on some scriveled up prune shit > Too much air in your pussy you screamin that it’s > TALKIN TO YOU DADDY, fart’s breathin out your lips splashin my dick badly > Use vinegar, to try to tighten up your ginger > All-mighty dick, ran in with a cape, some call him engine > Lightning rod bob, black candy cane attatched to God > Thick, like a great adventure cigar, in your garage > Pregnant pussy have you fall out, like Remi on the house > Watch the teeth for slobbin my shit > You bit it on the couch, dry pussy leave the friction burns > Plus beef I hone, the condom broke > Bitch you got AIDS I’m shakin in my bones God help me, I know that verse by heart. ---
**Author:** ![BunnyTVS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BunnyTVS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyTVS)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/44 "2009-06-26T01:02:06Z")
[Truth in Lyrics](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAZTLVJSlNw) It don’t look right see When She’s walkin’ down the street To see her ball bag jiggling To the beat of her feet ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/45 "2009-06-26T01:02:50Z")
deleted. Someone beat me to it. ---
**Author:** ![Peanut\_Gallery](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/838e76/32.png) [@Peanut\_Gallery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanut_Gallery)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/46 "2009-06-26T01:30:49Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > Mr Bungle’s _Squeeze Me, Macaroni_ is always my vote. “We’ve got girls who’ll eat your pee and poo! And guys who’d love to fuck your shoe!” or is that “Girls of Porn”? ICP should definitely get a mention somewhere in here. Pick a CD, point to a random song, and you’ll have a winner. Let’s start with “My Axe”: “Me and my axe will fuck your mother on your grave.” ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/47 "2009-06-26T03:21:36Z")
I’m sure these can’t compete with more modern offerings, at least not without the context of when they were released (at the controversy they engendered at the time). “[Why’d Ya Do It](http://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/marianne+faithfull/whyd+ya+do+it_20088583.html)” on Marianne Faithfull’s 1979 album _Broken English_ got banned in Australia (and by extension NZ since our records came via there – the vinyl I have of this record has a long silent track where this should be, but it’s on the CD I got more recently). Berlin’s 1982 release [Sex (I’m A…)](http://www.metrolyrics.com/sex-im-a-extended-version-lyrics-berlin.html) was refused play by a number of radio stations due to its lyrics (and extended background groaning and panting no doubt). 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/48 "2009-06-26T03:47:59Z")
[Potter Pals sing the Fuck Song](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6H7Owh0E3h0) ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/49 "2009-06-26T04:59:34Z")
Dinah Washington, “Long John Blues.” Ostensibly about her dentist–but not really. “He took out his trusty drill, told me to open wide, he said he wouldn’t hurt me but he filled my hole inside.” Etc. Not a bad word in the lot, unlike that Lucille hussy. ---
**Author:** ![Simmerdown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simmerdown/32/14859_2.png) [@Simmerdown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simmerdown)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/50 "2009-06-26T05:06:33Z")
Mentioned this in another thread. It’s John Trubee’s [Blind Man’s Penis](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wH8uZgtztok). This was supposedly originally contained the words “Stevie Wonder’s Penis,” instead of “a blind man’s penis” and is also known as _Peace and Love_. ---
**Author:** ![zoog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7ea924/32.png) [@zoog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoog)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/51 "2009-06-26T05:13:13Z")
Pearl Necklace by ZZ Top is pretty nasty, and that one pops up on classic rock radio stations from time to time. ---
**Author:** ![Coriolanus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/coriolanus/32/18769_2.png) [@Coriolanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coriolanus)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/52 "2009-06-26T05:41:13Z")
For FM radio, Dinah-moe-humm takes it. But **Loach** got it. For AM radio, I like Maria Muldaur’s Midnight at the Oasis: > [@](#): > > And you won’t need no camel, no no > When I take you for a ride Like I said, AM radio in the 70’s ---
**Author:** ![straight\_man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/straight_man/32/3027_2.png) [@straight\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/straight_man)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/53 "2009-06-26T07:20:33Z")
Louis Logic’s “Coochie”, also horrifically misogynistic. A few select quotes: So instead I’ll catch a rise With a wet surprise, from the yogurt slinger And poke a finger up her ass until the motion stings her … That’s when I get romantic with her face adjoined to my lap (sluuuut) How would you like to get fucked in the butt I know you probably love to get covered with nut … But instead of gettin’ screwed on TV I rather fuck cuties Unless ofcourse Judge Judie’s in the mood to eat me … Chicks say I’m old fashioned, I don’t want a bitch stuck in the kitchen I wanna stuff a dick in her ass while she’s touchin’ her kitten … I make 'em face the snake but I never taste the bottomlips I poke 'em with the Obelisk and flee from the scene Let me explain then you’ll see what I mean Cause as much as I love pussy you can’t feed it to me You know why? I don’t eat anything that bleeds for a week and don’t die What do I win? ---
**Author:** ![TheVioletCreep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eb8c5e/32.png) [@TheVioletCreep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheVioletCreep)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/54 "2009-06-26T09:29:59Z")
Semi-charmed-Life ~ Third Eye Blind ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/55 "2009-06-26T14:56:54Z")
**filling\_pages** I know _nothing_ about the Dead Kennedys, so I guess I kinda-sorta appreciate the information that the song wasn’t in earnest. Yuck~o. ---
**Author:** ![FalconFinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@FalconFinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FalconFinder)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/56 "2009-06-26T16:43:39Z")
I guess in comparison to some of these songs, “Feelin’ Love” by Paula Cole isn’t as dirty as it seemed to me before… ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/57 "2009-06-26T17:14:14Z")
> [@Corbomite](#): > > For AM radio, I like Maria Muldaur’s Midnight at the Oasis: > > Like I said, AM radio in the 70’s I don’t think that one competes with “Walk on the Wild Side.” Did the full version of Jefferson Starship’s “Miracles” get any AM airplay? ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/58 "2009-06-26T18:17:05Z")
“Sir Psycho Sexy” by Red Hot Chili Peppers: I got stopped by a lady cop In my automobile She said get out and spead your legs And then she tried to cop a feel That cop she was all dressed in blue Was she pretty? Boy I’m tellin’ you She stuck my butt with her big black stick I said “what’s up?” now suck my dick Like a ram getting ready to jam the lamb She whimpered just a little when she felt my hand On her crotch so very warm I could feel her getting wet through her uniform Proppin’ her up on the black and white Unzipped and slipped “ooo that’s tight” I swatted her like no swat team can Turned a cherry pie right into jam “Put it in Your Mouth” Akinyele (sweet sounding female backup vocals in this song, but dirty as hell): I’m all about mouth fuckin only if you down for dick suckin if not, be chair and a beer…keep truckin and fuck chap sticks I’m comin ashy as hell, wit chapped dicks for your chapped ass lips \>down in my mouth creamin your teeth like dentists as Im rubbin them with an erection like injections fuck it I be druggin them numbing up your tonsils like ambesol anesthetic cummin down your throat like chloraseptic no time for apologin…girlfriend if you… swallowin{gurgle}…gagolin I’m givin bitches permanent beers put your lips here and catch these damn facial hairs in your mouth ---
**Author:** ![filling\_pages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9bd4f/32.png) [@filling\_pages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filling_pages)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/59 "2009-06-26T18:24:05Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > **filling\_pages** I know _nothing_ about the Dead Kennedys, so I guess I kinda-sorta appreciate the information that the song wasn’t in earnest. Yuck~o. Glad to provide a little info. They’re honestly one of the truly great punk bands, so it’s a shame that was your only experience with them. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2009, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947/60 "2009-06-26T18:27:09Z")
Forgot this one, “Bullet” by the Misfits, about Jackie Kennedy: Arise Jackie O, Jonathon of Kennedy Well, arise and be shot down The dirt’s gonna be your dessert My cum be your life source And the only way to get it Is to suck or fuck Or be poor and devoid And masturbate me, masturbate me Then slurp it from your palm Like a dry desert soaking up rain [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dirtiest-songs-possibly-nsfw/500947.md?page=4)