# Disturbing Search Requests **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 29, 2000, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139 "2000-11-29T03:20:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cyndar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cyndar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyndar)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/41 "2000-11-30T08:35:06Z")
I looked. Someone wanted to see Tonya Harding naked, another was wondering about vaginal exercises, and what the heck is Lego Porn? One classy person was looking for stuff on fish tacos…sigh… ---
**Author:** ![robinh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@robinh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robinh)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/42 "2000-11-30T18:30:50Z")
this is horribly addictive **pull+down+her+panties** _quick_, now what do I do? **cooking+women** a _picky_ cannibal? **preteen+nudist** perhaps _this_ guy should take a look at the links the next guy found for **sworn+statement** **mature+old+lesbians** no childish, whiny old lesbians need apply **slurp** I don’t want to know. **issue+with+acrobat+capture** when _is_ acrobat season, anyway? **positive+things+about+chidren+in+beauty+pageants** stage mom self doubt **financially+unstable+Medical+Schools** maybe _this_ one is desperate enough to accept me… ---
**Author:** ![Palmyra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/57b2e6/32.png) [@Palmyra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palmyra)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/43 "2000-12-01T03:40:33Z")
these are in order, the best of what i saw in about 10 minutes… [i ignored all but the creepiest porn searches] **girls unrinating pictures** creepy… **body kits** insert tab A into slot B, and voila! an new arm! **the hangman poem** … okay… **women peeing pictures** not as creepy as the little girls one… **down on the farm** **mullet hair** okay, this haircut doens’t really need supporters… it needs a vaccine **half** saw this twice… no clue **hot lesbian rape stories** just sick… **things a network administrator should know** and the net is the best place you could think to look? **sweaty palms** nervous, huh? **asian sexual torture** freaky people are out there… **sis** bro! **i was f\*cking mom’s cunt** oedipus much? **dying fish** so you know when that goldfish is gonna die? **kidnap stories** **dead frog** kiss it and you get a dead prince **store for more** store… what? **joecartoon** um, that IS the addy, stupid **star wars porn** oh darth, baby, take that helmet off! let me see what’s under your cape! **the religion of british columbia** **mother-in-law** what they are and what planet they come from? **hot monkey sex** you KNOW tarzan wanted Cheetah, admit it **turning japanese** perhaps they were lokking for the song by The Vapors? **shitting pictures** GROSS… **halifax mooseheads** what does this mean? **pictures of god** this was just kinda cute… ---
**Author:** ![Palmyra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/57b2e6/32.png) [@Palmyra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palmyra)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/44 "2000-12-01T03:42:31Z")
saw this while closing the window… **making bombs from household supplies** … hope they don’t live near me… ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/45 "2000-12-01T04:57:52Z")
Okay, I feel hopelessly sheltered (a new feeling for me) but what’s a “twink”? ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/46 "2000-12-04T06:20:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cyndar \* > \*\*One classy person was looking for stuff on fish tacos…sigh… \*\* Fish tacos? I admit that if this is some reference to a bizarre sexual practice, I’m not familiar with it. However, fish tacos are sold in San Diego, specifically at Qualcomm Stadium, during San Diego Padre (and presumably San Diego Charger) games, by a company called Rubio’s. I’ve had one. They’re all right, I guess. [sub]I shudder to think of any alternative meanings to the term, however.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Primaflora](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Primaflora](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Primaflora)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/47 "2000-12-04T07:52:48Z")
ick treetment. sounds delightful 😉 ---
**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 9:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/48 "2000-12-04T09:43:48Z")
Yep. This website could keep me busy for hours. Some of the best: Preteen Sex Dirty Used Panties for Sale (good lord!) Hypnoskull (great band name) bigboob escorts (another band name!) face slapping red cheek mistress absolut vodka (finally, someone more along my train of thought!) switzerland beastality barbara mcclintock (she came up a few times… who the heck is she?) diaper tales (ewwwwwwwwwww) Free Mature Nude Housewives (for some reason, I just have this visual of Mrs. Brady romping nekkid through a meadow) pontius copilot ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/49 "2000-12-04T10:07:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by JavaMaven1 \* > **switzerland beastality** I thought there was a bit too little moderating going on in **CCC**. Now I know why… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cabbage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@Cabbage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cabbage)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/50 "2000-12-04T12:06:47Z")
**famous foreskins** …Jack Dean Tyler must have stopped by. ---
**Author:** ![SoMoMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@SoMoMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SoMoMom)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/51 "2000-12-04T18:28:14Z")
“GOO Fart” I do **not** want to know. “canadian whitle pages” Obviously a misspelling but go ahead and make up your own jokes for this one. Eewww! It’s back again. This time all caps “GOO FART” “ask jeevs” The same guy looking for the Canadian phone numbers I guess. _I keep typing in [http://www.askjeevs.com](http://www.askjeevs.com) and it ain’t there no more!_ “goodyear allegra” A person wondering about the effects of allergy medication on tires? New theory on the Firestone problem? “diseases caused by bateria” I’m just hoping that’s not a medical student. “hairy backed men” Oh, please, don’t tell me there is a site for that! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/52 "2000-12-04T19:38:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DRY \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Cyndar \* > > \*\*One classy person was looking for stuff on fish tacos…sigh… \*\* > > Fish tacos? I admit that if this is some reference to a bizarre sexual practice, I’m not familiar with it. > [/sub] \*\* Hi, I’m actor Troy McClure… ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/53 "2000-12-05T07:57:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Annie-Xmas \* > \*\*Hi, I’m actor Troy McClure… \*\* Um, I searched “Troy McClure” on Altavista and got a bunch of Simpsons references (I’ve seen the show, but only a couple of times). I still don’t get it. [sub]Wondering if I’m going to WANT to understand the reference[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![THespos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@THespos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/THespos)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/54 "2000-12-05T13:56:28Z")
I’m in Internet advertising and have been so since the commercial explosion of the web. In '96 or so, I was introduced to the salesman at Yahoo! who was (at the time) the only salesperson selling porno-related keywords. (Ads online can be triggered by the keyword used in the search, so as to produce some VERY targeted online ad inventory.) Needless to say, he was the most highly-compensated salesman in the New York office. Once, a porno site that couldn’t pay cash threw in a free password to his live sex site. This guy circulated the password around to a lot of his friends and it was about six months before the porno site caught on. Had to be a few dozen people using the account simultaneously. I digress… Once, I was shown a list of the top few hundred XXX-related search phrases from another top search engine and I was completely grossed out. Some that I remember: “genital piercing,” “hermaphrodite(s),” “feces eating,” “naked 11 year olds,” “crush videos,” “Rupaul naked.” Almost every weird fetish and illegal act was represented. You would be surprised at how many requests came in for naked celebrities. Tiffani-Amber Theissen was hot at the time - there were tens of thousands of requests for naked pictures of her in the space of only a few days. Pamela Anderson was one of the most-requested people online at the time, and many of the requests were obvious searches for her video with Tommy Lee. Some of the raunchier stuff made me wonder how computers got into the hands of so many perverts. This was back in '96, so online penetration (bad pun, sorry) wasn’t what it is today. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/55 "2000-12-05T14:58:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DRY \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Annie-Xmas \* > > \*\*Hi, I’m actor Troy McClure… \*\* > > Um, I searched “Troy McClure” on Altavista and got a bunch of Simpsons references (I’ve seen the show, but only a couple of times). I still don’t get it. > > [sub]Wondering if I’m going to WANT to understand the reference[/sub] \*\* In one episode, he marries Bart’s Aunt Selma to cover up his bizarre fish fetish. Maybe the line should be “Hi, I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me from such websites as fish tacos and A Fish Called Selma.” ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2000, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139/56 "2000-12-06T10:03:11Z")
“white+power+suspension” Ok, now I am really confused. Is this dimwit looking for a very specific front end for his car, or is he looking to hang the kkk. gb+nerve+gas+sarin That one just scares me. gum+elastic+bougie Sounds like disco’s back. Fire+Woman+Pics women on fire? or women who fight fire? body+customizations Oh! Cars! I thought… never mind. all+illegal+in+one+place Dude, that would be prision. motor+show+bologna That be some _fast_ luch meat. the+logical+journey+of+the+zoombeenies Zoombeenies? WTF are Zoombeenies. I bet they could catch that bologna! seventies+disco+dancing+gallery SEE! I TOLD you! canal+satelite Uh huh. ok. Um. WHAT?! Bagpipe+Web Hey, I am of Scottish heritage and even I have to say, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOOO! Fire+from+asshole Must be looking for “Dave’s Insanity Sauce”. automatic+browsing So your computer can keep staring at the net while you are away! urinotherapie Ya know the more I look at this one, the less I understand it. did they mean urine therapy? or “you are in other a pie?” Nothing makes sense anymore! Arrrrghghh. I+hate+sports+journalists Um, ok. so don’t talk to them. Sheesh. Enough for now. My mind is melting. gack. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/disturbing-search-requests/43139.md?page=2)