# Do all men find the sight of pubescent girls tantalising?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 21, 2016, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232 "2016-10-21T11:46:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/1 "2016-10-21T11:46:18Z")

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Hello,

I was talking to a potential partner about ageing. I’m 35, he’s 46. I said women in France, culturally, seem to be comfortable being/dressing sexy for a lot longer than our culture, the French don’t worship youth the same way we do.

He said yes, but when a girl enters puberty, the male brain goes ‘ding’, because in cave man days she would be ready to be mated. I was taken aback, and later rang him to clarify. He said, "I was just saying that seeing girls, in puberty, can be a little bit tantalising.’

Is this the case? What does he mean? Is it harmless or should I dump him? He doesn’t seem like a pervert, and says he’s never dated with such a large age gap. Now I’m just freaking out thinking all men/him are turned on by pubescent girls and I don’t know how to take it. Please help explain this to me, decent kind men out there!

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/2 "2016-10-21T11:52:57Z")

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Do you even know what pubescent means?

Pubescent means one who, in the language of my mother’s generation, “has made the change”. One who isn’t a child any more physically, even if she is one legally.

Does every man find every teenaged girl attractive? No. Do most men find certain adolescents attractive? Yes. And you just found this out? Where have you been living since you were 15?

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/3 "2016-10-21T11:56:47Z")

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Before getting your period, when you just start growing breasts

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**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/4 "2016-10-21T11:59:00Z")

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Gay men don’t - and don’t all regard pubescent boys in a similar light either, contrary to widespread prejudice.

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/5 "2016-10-21T12:01:33Z")

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> [@Lola181](#):
>
> Before getting your period, when you just start growing breasts

No. That’s PREpubescent.

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/6 "2016-10-21T12:02:26Z")

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Ok. Thanks for setting me straight 😊

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/7 "2016-10-21T12:05:52Z")

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Big difference 🙂 I can see freaking out at the idea that your boyfriend would get the hots for an 11yo, but that’s not the case.

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**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/8 "2016-10-21T12:09:57Z")

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Umm, eww.

I don’t care if it’s true or not, just eww.

I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way. You know, like how they stampeded to their own defense in the “Women’s Groping Stories” thread. If not, I wonder why not?

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/9 "2016-10-21T12:13:31Z")

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> [@Nava](#):
>
> Big difference 🙂 I can see freaking out at the idea that your boyfriend would get the hots for an 11yo, but that’s not the case.

Yes he obviously doesn’t have a way with words but at least he’s honest lol!

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/10 "2016-10-21T12:14:37Z")

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> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#):
>
> Umm, eww.
> 
> I don’t care if it’s true or not, just eww.
> 
> I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way. You know, like how they stampeded to their own defense in the “Women’s Groping Stories” thread. If not, I wonder why not?

Yeah that’s what I thought!

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**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/11 "2016-10-21T12:19:13Z")

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Total Posts: 5 [all in this thread]  
Join Date: 10-21-2016

We certainly do like brand-new posters bringing spicy topics. Welcome to the SDMB.

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**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/12 "2016-10-21T12:23:37Z")

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> [@HMS\_Irruncible](#):
>
> Total Posts: 5 [all in this thread]  
> Join Date: 10-21-2016

Personally, I notice the post title/username first. I expected to see ‘nymphette’ in the OP somewhere.

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**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/13 "2016-10-21T12:24:01Z")

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> [@Joey\_P](#):
>
> Personally, I notice the post title/username first. I expected to see ‘nymphette’ in the OP somewhere.

Pervert. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/14 "2016-10-21T12:28:21Z")

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Alright, folks. Let’s keep the subtle and not-so-subtle accusations out of this thread. Thanks.

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/15 "2016-10-21T12:31:39Z")

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> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#):
>
> Umm, eww.
> 
> I don’t care if it’s true or not, just eww.
> 
> I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way. You know, like how they stampeded to their own defense in the “Women’s Groping Stories” thread. If not, I wonder why not?

Shrug, the only way I know which pictures of me are of 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 or 19 is by looking at other people, the clothes I’m wearing or where they were taken. I went from “skinny little kid” to “definitely not a kid” in the last three months of being 12yo, didn’t really change features again (and that was mainly on the face) until I was counting down to 20. The picture in my 19yo student ID still has facial babyfat, the one at 20 doesn’t.

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**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/16 "2016-10-21T12:32:48Z")

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> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#):
>
> I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way.

The OP’s friend said he finds pubescent women tantalizing. There’s some disagreement upthread on the meaning of the word, [which officially is “relating to or denoting a person at or approaching the age of puberty.”](https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=definition+pubescent) That’s a little bit fuzzy. If we’re talking about girls who are still approaching the age, then yikes, they’re still kids; someone who is attracted to them is, by definition, a pedophile. OTOH, if we’re talking about minors who have gone through (or mostly gone through) puberty, then physiologically, they’re adults.

And “think” is the wrong word to use here. It’s not a think, it’s a biological response. If a man is physically attracted to adult women, and a minor-age female exhibits all the visual features of an adult woman, then it stands to reason that he would find her physically attractive, even if years of good upbringing have conditioned him to cognitively label her off-limits (because she’s legally a minor and mentally still a child) and steer clear of her.

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/17 "2016-10-21T12:35:58Z")

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Excuse me if I prefer an actual dictionary to “whatever Google coughed up”. M-w:

Simple Definition of pubescent  
: beginning to physically develop into an adult : having reached puberty

Full Definition of pubescent  
1  
a : arriving at or having reached puberty  
b : of or relating to puberty  
2  
: covered with fine soft short hairs — compare villous

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**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/18 "2016-10-21T12:44:15Z")

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> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#):
>
> Umm, eww.
> 
> I don’t care if it’s true or not, just eww.
> 
> I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way. You know, like how they stampeded to their own defense in the “Women’s Groping Stories” thread. If not, I wonder why not?

There’s nothing wrong in thinking some teenage girls are hot, no matter how disgusting you find it.

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**Author:** ![Lola181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lola181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lola181)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/19 "2016-10-21T12:59:46Z")

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> [@DigitalC](#):
>
> There’s nothing wrong in thinking some teenage girls are hot, no matter how disgusting you find it.

Digital C. If only he could have just said that instead of "pubescent girls can be a little bit tantalising’ then I would have understood! He was trying to make a good impression I guess, and he’s a British vet who works with a lot of breeders. Enough said I guess.

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**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2016, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-all-men-find-the-sight-of-pubescent-girls-tantalising/769232/20 "2016-10-21T13:01:47Z")

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> [@Two Many Cats](#):
>
> Umm, eww.
> 
> I don’t care if it’s true or not, just eww.
> 
> I wonder if male Dopers will come rushing into this thread to deny that they or their friends would EVER think this way. You know, like how they stampeded to their own defense in the “Women’s Groping Stories” thread. If not, I wonder why not?

There would be no point in denying - it is practically self-evident. Men find post-pubescent women sexually interesting. The creepy attitude is finding pre-pubescent girls sexually interesting.

[This](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=124928) is a very old thread, but it is about the same sort of thing. Noticing that a thirteen year old has nice boobs is different from being a child molester or a pervert.

Regards,  
Shodan

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