# Do anniversaries matter to you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 3, 2011, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375 "2011-08-03T21:17:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/21 "2011-08-04T05:16:29Z")
> [@Pai325](#): > > Birthdays? Yes. Wedding anniversaries? No. Exactly how I feel and felt when I was married. Most years we would forget our anniversary, but we always celebrated birthdays. I threw a great party on his 50th. We are separated now, but I made him a nice dinner on his last birthday and we celebrated together with the kids. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/22 "2011-08-04T17:29:57Z")
I care to the extent that I think it’s important… or at least, nice… to say “Happy Anniversary” to each other on the relevant day. We may or may not celebrate it; while I was in school, our wedding anniversary always seemed to fall the day before a midterm exam and I had to study! We might make a nicer-than-usual meal on or about the date, and maybe spend an extra $5 on a bottle of wine or somesuch. We don’t really celebrate birthdays all that much either, because our birthdays are a week apart (and mine is 2 days after our “dating anniversary”) and I hate that I-buy-you-something-if-you-buy-me-something feeling that has. So we usually just do one thing for us both around that time. So, recognition of the date is important, but I don’t care if it isn’t more than just a nice word to each other. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/23 "2011-08-04T17:46:42Z")
My wedding anniversary is tomorrow (39 years) so I guess I will go buy a card today. Our birthdays are a day apart, and we go out to dinner once. A couple of years ago my husband put some money in a card for my birthday because he didn’t know what to get me, and that made me laugh. We usually agree not to get each other anything. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/24 "2011-08-04T17:52:38Z")
Thankfully no, because I have no idea what day we would celebrate. We were friends long before we were a couple; we met some time in early 1986, but didn’t become a couple for about 5 years. We never had a first date; the closest thing would have been the summer of 1991 We’re not married, so there is no wedding anniversary; I suppose we could celebrate the day I moved in with him. 20 years coming up soon. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/25 "2011-08-04T19:48:58Z")
I’m bad with dates and tend to be pretty indifferent to anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays. I’ll make an effort when it’s important to someone I care about, and I won’t say “No, I’m not celebrating our anniversary!” But if it’s all left to me I tend to forget about them. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/26 "2011-08-04T20:05:34Z")
Yes, anniversaries matter to me. I’m big on significant dates of all kinds, and I tend to remember them. That being said, I don’t think it’s necessary to make a huge deal out of anniversaries. I enjoy noting them, but I don’t think they ought to come with obligation. Still, as someone else said, it’s sometimes nice to have an excuse to go out for a nice dinner, if such an excuse is needed. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/27 "2011-08-04T20:27:44Z")
My wife rarely remembers our anniversary but I am afraid to forget. That might be the year she decides it is important. Like other, I have to count back from my firstborn’s age to remember how many years it has been but the date is easy enough. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/28 "2011-08-04T20:40:36Z")
Anniversaries are important to both my husband and I. This Sunday is our first wedding anniversary and we are going out to dinner to celebrate and possibly going to see a show. In the last 12 months we got married, moved to a new apartment, went to Finland, adopted a puppy, got pregnant, and he found a new job after almost a year of unemployment so we have a lot to celebrate! ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/29 "2011-08-04T20:54:16Z")
We both tend to be the “oh, our anniversary/valentines day/whatever else is in 2 days. Wanna do something?” types. So put me down as a meh. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/30 "2011-08-04T20:57:35Z")
I celebrate not only our wedding anniversary, but also the day we met. I’m romantic; what can I say? But it’s not a huge deal, just a fun thing. ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/31 "2011-08-04T21:13:34Z")
Our anniversary is December 21, which is, as you’ll note, quite close to Christmas. I think we exchanged presents for our 10th anniversary, but in general, that’s too busy a time of year to do much else to celebrate. I’m not huge on anniversaries, so I’m fine with that. It has been almost 20 years since we first hooked up. I might do a little something to celebrate that. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/32 "2011-08-04T21:17:20Z")
Yes, I enjoy little cultural traditions like that. Our entire lives don’t revolve around them (we were in separate countries on our 1 year wedding anniversary), but yeah, I think they’re worth being celebrated in some way. ---
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/33 "2011-08-04T22:05:04Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > We both tend to be the “oh, our anniversary/valentines day/whatever else is in 2 days. Wanna do something?” types. So put me down as a meh. I usually am like, “OH CRAP! That was TODAY? oops..” And that’s usually after everything’s closed. It’s not that I’m selfish I just don’t think of these as important. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/34 "2011-08-04T23:33:36Z")
Meh. It’s nice and all but it’s not mandatory we do something on our anniversary no matter what. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2011, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/35 "2011-08-04T23:38:10Z")
I always remember my anniversary. I met my wife on that date, I proposed on that date, we got married on that date. And it’s the day after a **major** date in US history that everybody talks about every year. I’m no dummy. (Well, I am, but not about remembering my anniversary.) ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2011, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/36 "2011-08-06T03:34:23Z")
Yes. Marking Important Dates is what we hang our memories on. Like beaver’s dams interrupting the constant stream (of time.) ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2011, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/37 "2011-08-06T05:53:23Z")
They’re important to me. My parents were unhappily married for decades. I use my anniversary (and the few weeks before it) to do almost a yearly mental ‘health check’ on my marriage, just to confirm that I’m still happy and it’s still heading in the right direction. DH originally felt like I wasn’t in it for the long haul with that attitude, but now understands that I am, I just don’t want to be unhappy for the long haul. We have occasionally joked about the “yearly renewal” being due. And of course, it’s almost guaranteed I’ll get laid that day, so what’s not to like? 😉 Birthdays - not really fussed at all about. They have little meaning to me. But our anniversary, yes, it’s important to me. ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/38 "2011-08-08T15:04:21Z")
> [@spooje](#): > > I’m all for celebrating stuff, but why it needs to be on that particular day, and not the day before or after or a month after…it baffles me. Sorry, but if you care enough about something why don’t you care enough to do it on the day? Some years ago I had plans to go to England to take part in a 100th birthday celebration, but when I heard that the organisers planned to do it on the weekend, two days after the actual day, because it suited people better I decided to stay at home.You don’t celebrate something just to please yourself, you do it to honour the person whose birthday it was (although he had been dead since 1942). The fact that I organised my own birthday celebration on the wrong day last year has got nothing to do with it. It was my own decision and it coincided with something else (and if it hadn’t I wouldn’t have celebrated it at all). ---
**Author:** ![Vihaga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Vihaga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vihaga)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/39 "2011-08-08T15:14:06Z")
> [@Floater](#): > > Sorry, but if you care enough about something why don’t you care enough to do it on the day? I am up for celebrating anything (including anniversaries), but I don’t get this. If I can celebrate a birthday, with my entire family by doing it on a weekend instead of celebrating alone on a weekday, why not? We live too far away for weekday travel time to be possible without taking time off work, and weekends are generally convenient for everyone. Enjoying the occasion and spending time together is way more important than hitting a certain day. > [@Floater](#): > > You don’t celebrate something just to please yourself, you do it to honour the person whose birthday it was (although he had been dead since 1942). Why celebrate anything, other than for the people involved to enjoy themselves? Obviously, if the person whose occasion it is cares about the date, then they should be accommodated, but the guy was dead, what did he care? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375/40 "2011-08-08T15:21:20Z")
We do a monthly anniversary. Up into the multiple 100s now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-anniversaries-matter-to-you/591375.md?page=3)