# Do British couples prefer not to find out the sex of their gestating baby? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Tags:** tv-shows-scripted\ **Created:** [April 30, 2025, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678 "2025-04-30T01:40:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![UDS1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e47774/32.png) [@UDS1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UDS1)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/41 "2025-05-01T06:37:20Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > And on edit… a bassinette would normally be a cot you can pick up and carry around Oh, you mean a carry-cot. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/42 "2025-05-01T08:57:36Z")
A lot of couples prefer not to find out before the birth, they like the anticipation. Also, removes the need for a tacky “reveal” party unless they really have to join the celebrity sycophants 🙂 Most of my younger colleagues also prefer the idea of neutral colour baby clothes so that they can pass them around the family, or keep them for the next child if they plan on having more than one. If you’re slavishly sticking to the “pink for girls, blue for boys” thing, then having one of each means buying two separate sets of baby gear 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/43 "2025-05-01T08:59:32Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > Does that work for second children? I thought that a few fetal cells lingered in the mother for the rest of her life, and it was hypothesized that this was one reason women have a higher rate of auto-immune disease than men – because it’s often not an immune response to “self” but to “my child’s lingering cells”. Even if that’s true, the amount is going to be negligible. I was reading up on it; apparently it involves finding DNA fragments floating around in the mother’s blood (vs inside cells where most DNA is found). Then they sequence the fragments to determine which chromosome they came from. If some came from the Y chromosome, it’s a boy; if not, it’s a girl. To detect trisomy, they look at the proportions of fragments from each chromosome to see if any are overrepresented. All this assumes the mother is chromosomally normal. > **[NIPT: Everything About the Non-Invasive Prenatal Screening Test - Synlab](https://www.synlab-sd.com/en/blog/womens-health-en/nipt-all-you-need-to-know-about-the-non-invasive-prenatal-screening-test/)** > > Do you know about NIPT? It is a prenatal test capable of studying major chromosomal abnormalities without posing a risk to the mother and baby. Check it out! Also, AFAIK the reason women are more prone to autoimmune diseases is X-inactivation. In every cell, one or the other X chromosome is inactivated, and immune cells with one X chromosome expressed can sometimes develop antibodies to cells with the other one expressed. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/44 "2025-05-01T09:26:28Z")
I was talking about microchimerism, which i guess is different from what this test is looking for: [https://touroscholar.touro.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1254&context=sjlcas](https://touroscholar.touro.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1254&context=sjlcas) > Fetal Microchimerism Microchimerism is the fetus’s cell legacy after pregnancy. Fetal stem cells can leave the fetus and migrate across the placenta to engraft in the maternal bone marrow and other tissues. The transfer of fetal progenitor stem cells begins four or five weeks after fertilization and continues throughout the pregnancy. This form of microchimerism occurs in both male and female embryos, but the detection of male microchimerism in maternal tissue is easier to detect due to the unique presence of Y-chromosome in the women. (Miech, 2010) ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/45 "2025-05-01T13:19:33Z")
I’ve heard ‘crib’ being used in BrE - usually only if it’s an old-fashioned thing, small to the extent that it’s only really suitable for 0-3 months, probably made of wood, maybe with rockers. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/46 "2025-05-01T13:58:12Z")
Which gizmo an American would call a “'cradle”. Damn, but this multilingual stuff is hard. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/47 "2025-05-01T16:46:35Z")
Reading the thread, can I sum it up by saying prospective parents in London say “No sex please, we’re British?” ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/48 "2025-05-01T17:41:54Z")
> [@kk\_fusion](#): > > Just FTR, it’s the mom that’s “gestating”, not the fetus. Unless you’re an aphid. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/49 "2025-05-01T17:46:04Z")
> [@Pardel-Lux](#): > > > [@SanVito](#): > > > > have a gender reveal party > > Is that what they are called? I thought the sex could be determined in the gestat **ed** baby but the gender would show later in life. That’s what they are called, as in, that’s what people call them: > **[Gender reveal party](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_reveal_party)** > > A gender reveal party is a party held during pregnancy to reveal the baby's sex to the expectant parents' family and friends, and sometimes to the parents themselves. Prenatal sex discernment technology furnishes the necessary information. The practice originated in the United States during the late 2000s. > It is distinct from, but sometimes combined with, a baby shower, where the primary activity is giving expecting parents gifts for their future child. The gender reveal party often involves g... Your note (as well as criticism of all the wildfires they apparently have caused) can be found under the “Criticism” heading. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/50 "2025-05-01T17:50:55Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > It is. It’s so common that the system is set up for it - the infant retail chains will let you make all your purchases, and then hold them for months before they deliver them with 24 hours’ notice. I did that myself, at my parents’ insistence, which meant I spent part of the day after my son’s birth at home, building a crib. > > I don’t know if it’s literal fear of the Evil Eye, or just fear of dramatic irony, but Jews are weird when it comes to pregnancy. Did you know you’re not supposed to say “Mazal tov” (congratulations) about someone who’s expecting? Because you can’t know whether it will be a good event or a bad one until the child is born, you’re supposed to say “Sheyihiye b’mazal” (may you have good fortune) instead. Yeah, it was weird for my parents to buy us baby stuff at for our baby shower, but my wife wanted one, and having one is her family’s expectation, so obviously it was up to her. My mom’s love of buying things for my kids eventually won out over any awkwardness, haha. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/51 "2025-05-01T17:54:13Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > I’ve heard ‘crib’ being used in BrE - usually only if it’s an old-fashioned thing, small to the extent that it’s only really suitable for 0-3 months, probably made of wood, maybe with rockers. > [@LSLGuy](#): > > Which gizmo an American would call a “'cradle”. Damn, but this multilingual stuff is hard. 😉 Isn’t the tiny little crib like thing you use for the first few months a “bassinet”? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/52 "2025-05-01T18:52:48Z")
> [@Babale](#): > > Isn’t the tiny little crib like thing you use for the first few months a “bassinet”? Right - cradles rock. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/53 "2025-05-01T19:20:16Z")
> [@SanVito](#): > > But it wouldn’t be unusual for a couple to decide they want to know and - god forbid - have a gender reveal party. I have a great idea for a gender reveal party. Store bought sheet cake. Blue filling if a boy or pink filling if a girl. And hopefully the cake doesn’t start a wildfire. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/54 "2025-05-01T19:23:50Z")
When the wind blows… (We [used to use bassinette](https://youtu.be/IEZI6D5VVPY?feature=shared), but it sounds old-fashioned now. As mentioned up thread, “carry cot” is more likely now). ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/55 "2025-05-01T19:48:53Z")
> [@Babale](#): > > Isn’t the tiny little crib like thing you use for the first few months a “bassinet”? Damned good question. I was sure till you asked me. IANA parent; the last time I used a bassinet I was the guest of honor sleeping there. It seems from Googling that in US parlance a bassinet is a small high sided newborn bed. Maybe it sits on the floor on short legs, maybe it sits on a table or clips the side of the parents’ bed. More Googling suggests that in US parlance a cradle may be larger, and usually has a rocking feature. Tying my comment back to @Mangetout’s words that triggered mine … > [@Mangetout](#): > > I’ve heard ‘crib’ being used in BrE - usually only if it’s an old-fashioned thing, small to the extent that it’s only really suitable for 0-3 months, probably made of wood, maybe with rockers. It seems the rockerness suggests a cradle in US parlance but the newborn size suggests bassinet would be the US term. Babies are hard enough without all this terminology nonsense. gaah! ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/56 "2025-05-01T20:19:40Z")
When i had babies, a very small bed that might have legs or might just be places on something was a bassinet, and a simple bed that was made of wood and had rockers was a cradle. I also had a “car bed”, which could be folded up and carried when visiting friends, but as it had become illegal to actually use them in a car, they were no longer available for sale. (Even though i never used it in a car and found it super helpful.) The basic small bed that you might put a baby in from when it leaves the parents’ bedroom until it is old enough to use a regular bed is a crib in the US. I think we also use “crib” to describe a thing that holds cattle feed, and maybe other things with a similar shape. I don’t think I’ve even seen “carry cot” outside this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2025, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/57 "2025-05-01T22:15:50Z")
I don’t recall anyone calling it a bassinette in the UK, but maybe people do ---
**Author:** ![BippityBoppityBoo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bippityboppityboo/32/5745_2.png) [@BippityBoppityBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BippityBoppityBoo)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2025, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/58 "2025-05-02T02:03:47Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > It seems from Googling that in US parlance a bassinet is a small high sided newborn bed. Maybe it sits on the floor on short legs, maybe it sits on a table or clips the side of the parents’ bed. Check > [@LSLGuy](#): > > More Googling suggests that in US parlance a cradle may be larger, and usually has a rocking feature. Check (often not much bigger than a bassinet though) often were handmade so size varied and handed down through generations. Crib, here in the US is the larger baby bed with slats for sides, the mattress adjusting down from the top so a standing toddler couldn’t climb out. Here the the US federal guidelines are: … Your full-size crib should have interior dimensions between 27 ⅜ - 28 ⅝ inches in width and an interior length between 51 ¾ - 53 inches. With these parameters, a standard crib mattress will fit safely in your crib….[from pottery barn kids] My new 5 week old grand son has a bassinet next to his parent’s bed and a full size crib in the nursery which he’ll transition to when he no longer needs to nurse several times during the night. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2025, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/59 "2025-05-02T07:06:23Z")
In Scotland you can get a free “baby box” > **[Baby box | Parent Club](https://www.parentclub.scot/baby-box)** > > The Baby Box helps families prepare for the arrival of their baby. New babies need a surprising amount of stuff! Scotland’s Baby Box is packed full of clothes, bedding and lots of other useful things to help give your baby the best possible start in... ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2025, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678/60 "2025-05-02T09:25:51Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > I was talking about microchimerism, which i guess is different from what this test is looking for: Yeah, that looks like something different. And I was wrong about the autoimmune diseases, the increased risk is a result of X-inactivation, but more likely due to RNA-protein-DNA complexes generated in the course of X-chromosome inactivation rather than simply different genes being expressed in different tissues: > **[Stanford Medicine-led study shows why women are at greater risk of autoimmune...](https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2024/02/women-autoimmune.html)** > > Research throws light on the mystery of why women are much more prone to autoimmune disorders: A molecule made by one X chromosome in every female cell can generate antibodies to a woman's own tissues. They didn’t discover it before because they were using a male cell line as the standard, and the relevant protein is never expressed in males. 🤦‍♀️ And the above study was funded by the NIH, and is probably exactly the kind of thing Trump is cancelling. 😡 * * * > [@Mangetout](#): > > I’ve heard ‘crib’ being used in BrE - usually only if it’s an old-fashioned thing, small to the extent that it’s only really suitable for 0-3 months, probably made of wood, maybe with rockers. I’m pretty sure the small baby bed I got, that could be strapped to the side of our bed and the side let down so it was open on the bed side, was called a crib; “Next to me crib” was the biggest brand. My daughter didn’t sleep there for long, though; she ended up in our bed with me. When she got too big for that we had the choice of getting a standard cot or a ‘cot bed’ that could be transformed into a toddler bed by removing the barred sides. (When we were kids, cots had a drop-side, but that’s illegal now.) My husband bought a cot bed, but she hated the cot so much we gave up, and when we did get her to sleep in her own room, she went straight into the single bed we already owned for guests, with a bed rail to stop her falling out. So both crib and cot were a waste of money. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-british-couples-prefer-not-to-find-out-the-sex-of-their-gestating-baby/1017678.md?page=2)