# Do I have a right to know who bit my child in the face?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [December 6, 2012, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153 "2012-12-06T03:38:15Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 4
### Author:  [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/61 "2012-12-06T20:48:28Z")
I’m pretty sure that “not telling you who got into a scuffle with your child on the playground” is not a crime. If it is a crime, I would love for some legal expert to roll in and tell us exactly what the charges would be, because I think this thread could use some new excitement at this point.
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### Author:  [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/62 "2012-12-06T22:25:17Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#):
>
> Was there a post where the one year old needed facial reconstructive surgery that only you could see?
Was there a post that implied this that only you could see?
(Straight Dope ping pong; one of the stupidest games extant.)
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/63 "2012-12-06T23:16:10Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#):
>
> I also am confused. Do you really not have the legal right to know who is harming your children? I just always assumed that if your kid was harmed at school or daycare, you had the right to know who did it. If for nothing else than to find out if the child has any diseases that could be transmitted.
That’s actually a pretty sticky wicket. The school could tell you if the child had any communicable diseases. The school could tell you the child’s name or identifying information. But they can’t tell you both. Telling you both is revealing personal medical information about someone - they need a signed consent form for that, thanks to HIPAA.
We see this, not with biting, but with headlice. We’ll get a letter home every few months that “headlice have been discovered” in the school, or even the classroom, but no information about \*who \*they’ve been discovered on. Also, allergies. Last year we were notified that there is a nut allergy in the class, but that we couldn’t be told who had it, due to medical privacy laws. (Of course it took the kids about 30 seconds to figure out who it was, but no laws prevent Nathan from telling Olivia that he’s allergic to nuts, and Olivia hasn’t read HIPAA yet.)
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### Author:  [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/64 "2012-12-06T23:23:31Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#):
>
> If it was my kid, I would tell them to either tell me, **or** I will press charges.
>
> If it is there policy to not inform you who is abusing/harming your child, that is a place I would not want my child to visit.
You’re adorable. Press charges for what?
I presume that if your kid was the biter, you’d want a warning memo sent to all the parents?
We’re talking about \*toddlers \*behaving in predictably toddlerish ways. God help you when your kid gets old enough that you have serious shit to worry about.
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### Author:  [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/65 "2012-12-06T23:40:35Z")
Although it’s very rare, HIV can be transmitted by human bites that break the skin.
I would want to have documentation of who had bitten the kid just in case there was some kind of serious consequence later on such as that.
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### Author:  [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)
#### Post date: [December 6, 2012, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/66 "2012-12-06T23:59:28Z")
There’s “very rare” and then there’s “you’re fucking kidding me, right?”
Please, I beg you… just put your kids in bubbles. Stop being a pain in everyone else’s ass.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/67 "2012-12-07T00:04:49Z")
Best $400.00 I ever spent was for a vasectomy.
🙂
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### Author:  [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/68 "2012-12-07T00:21:37Z")
> [@DianaG](#):
>
> There’s “very rare” and then there’s “you’re fucking kidding me, right?”
>
> Please, I beg you… just put your kids in bubbles. Stop being a pain in everyone else’s ass.
Clearly, you are a child-hater.
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### Author:  [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/69 "2012-12-07T00:32:08Z")
> [@DianaG](#):
>
> You’re adorable. Press charges for what?
>
> I presume that if your kid was the biter, you’d want a warning memo sent to all the parents?
What’s a memo going to accomplish? Clearly, TMIB’s kid would need a cage muzzle. Anything less would leave him open not only to civil suits for damages, but wanton endangerment charges.
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/70 "2012-12-07T00:35:29Z")
> [@lavenderviolet](#):
>
> Although it’s very rare, HIV can be transmitted by human bites that break the skin.
Please find me one case in the literature of such a transmission which didn’t involve the HIV positive biter having a mouthful of blood first. Just one.
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### Author:  [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_In_Black)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/71 "2012-12-07T00:41:25Z")
> [@DianaG](#):
>
> You’re adorable. Press charges for what?
>
> I presume that if your kid was the biter, you’d want a warning memo sent to all the parents?
>
> We’re talking about \*toddlers \*behaving in predictably toddlerish ways. God help you when your kid gets old enough that you have serious shit to worry about.
If I had to take my child to the ER to have there face looked with bite marks, I am thinking they would be asking questions. And then I’d have to pay for the Dr. visit.
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### Author:  [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/72 "2012-12-07T00:41:50Z")
I dunno–I read a book recently about Napoleon’s campaign and his AIDS-day-camp.
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/73 "2012-12-07T01:11:43Z")
My son was a biter at that age. Whenever I was told he bit someone (this happened about 5 times when he was between 1-2) I asked them who was bitten and who their parent/guardian was so I could talk with them a apologize. I even made my son apologize. My daycare was very close knit and it was never an issue that the parent whose child was bit knew it was my son. In fact I wanted them to know so we could discuss it.
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### Author:  [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/74 "2012-12-07T01:22:44Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#):
>
> If I had to take my child to the ER to have there face looked with bite marks, I am thinking they would be asking questions. And then I’d have to pay for the Dr. visit.
That’s a sad story, for sure. I’ll repeat the question; what exactly are you going to charge them with?
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/75 "2012-12-07T01:25:36Z")
> [@Pazu](#):
>
> Our preschool had a “don’t identify the biter” policy too, which fell flat when one of our twins bit the other one.
>
> (Later, when I asked why she had bitten her sister, she said, “I was hungry.”)
hahah, got to love twins
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### Author:  [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_In_Black)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/76 "2012-12-07T01:33:40Z")
> [@DianaG](#):
>
> That’s a sad story, for sure. I’ll repeat the question; what exactly are you going to charge them with?
Are you actually telling me that if my kid was to cause harm to another kid that required medical treatment, that I would not have to pay for it?
Maybe “charge them” is the term your getting hung up on, I’m not sure. But **if** compensation is legally owed, do you have no way to collect it? That is the heart of what I am saying.
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### Author:  [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/77 "2012-12-07T01:39:03Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#):
>
> Are you actually telling me that if my kid was to cause harm to another kid that required medical treatment, that I would not have to pay for it?
I can think of three parties who should be responsible, if Bob bites Suzy, and Bob and Suzy are both toddlers at L’il Shitz Daycare Center:
1. The parents of Bob, who knowingly placed their dangerous toddler around other innocent people.
2. The owners of L’il Shitz Daycare Center, who negligently allowed a known danger (a toddler) to be around an innocent party (a toddler).
3. Suzy’s parents, who knowingly placed their toddler in a dangerous location (i.e., around other toddlers).
What’s your case that #1 has more responsibility than #3?
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### Author:  [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/78 "2012-12-07T01:39:07Z")
> [@DianaG](#):
>
> That’s a sad story, for sure. I’ll repeat the question; what exactly are you going to charge them with?
Sometimesvshit happens and you have to pay a hospital bill. Doesn’t mean you can hold the parents of a toddler liable.
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/79 "2012-12-07T01:39:52Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#):
>
> Are you actually telling me that if my kid was to cause harm to another kid that required medical treatment, that I would not have to pay for it?
>
> Maybe “charge them” is the term your getting hung up on, I’m not sure. But **if** compensation is legally owed, do you have no way to collect it? That is the heart of what I am saying.
Do you even have kids? Toddler on toddler violence is not grounds for medical compensation. Sorry bub.
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### Author:  [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)
#### Post date: [December 7, 2012, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-i-have-a-right-to-know-who-bit-my-child-in-the-face/643153/80 "2012-12-07T01:44:09Z")
> [@April\_R](#):
>
> Toddler on toddler violence is not grounds for medical compensation. Sorry bub.
Stop the violence.
Increase the peace.
Break the silence.
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