# Do loved ones contact us after death? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 28, 2013, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596 "2013-01-28T06:57:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sudden\_Kestrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Sudden\_Kestrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sudden_Kestrel)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/21 "2013-01-29T01:25:01Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Sure there is. And post #2 covered it pretty well. So, post #2 is your cite? šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Esox\_Lucius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Esox\_Lucius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esox_Lucius)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/22 "2013-01-29T04:18:15Z")
About as much chance as being visited by them before they were born. > [@obbn](#): > > On the other hand if you are convinced itā€™s all a lie and we become nothing more than worm food upon death, **God** for you too. Nice one. šŸ™‚ Thereā€™s a term for that but Iā€™m afreud itā€™s slipped my penisā€“no, _ **mind** _. I meant to say ā€œslipped my testicleā€. Oh dearā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/23 "2013-01-29T10:59:32Z")
1. I think it happens sometimes. 2. Itā€™s happened to me once, in a dream when a teacher died. About a month after my mom died, she showed up in a friendā€™s dream and told her how happy she is. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/24 "2013-01-29T11:29:02Z")
Iā€™ve had previous ā€˜lovedā€™ ones appear in my dreams with the same (irregular) regularity as Iā€™ve had ā€˜loathedā€™ dead folks appear. Iā€™ve never had either tried to contact me via telegram, email or Facebook if that helps. IOWā€¦there is no afterlife, there is nothing after death, and thank GOD for that!! šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/25 "2013-01-29T12:57:25Z")
> [@Derleth](#): > > Things like this: > [ul] > [li]There is no known mechanism that would permit the consciousness to keep working after the body is destroyed.[/li][li]There has never been a verified case of such contact.[/li][li]Consciousness surviving after death would violate the laws of entropy, which are the best-tested laws of physics we have.[/li][/ul] > > That last one perhaps isnā€™t obvious: Consciousness is a very non-random pattern of neural firings, and there are a lot more ways to be not conscious than there are to be conscious. Even if it is a pattern of something other than neural firings, this still means consciousness is lower-entropy than the alternative, which means it can only be maintained by pouring energy into the system that exhibits it. Hence you need to eat. Consciousness being maintained once the mind has ceased to get energy from somewhere would violate the laws of entropy, which are the best-tested best-verified laws we have. They work at every level, from galaxies to the quantum sub-microscopic, so the odds of them being that far wrong are, really, too small to even consider. The problem with the last one is the widely-held assumption that the afterlife, if there is such a thing, takes place outside our space-time continuum, and the energy required to sustain consciousness once the body ceases to supply that energy would come from such an outside source. Hence no violation of the laws of entropy that apply to our space-time bubble. Now you can point out that thereā€™s no evidence of anything at all ā€˜outsideā€™ our space-time continuum, let alone evidence of something specific like what Iā€™ve imagined here. And that would be true. But thatā€™s #1, not #3. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/26 "2013-01-29T13:34:55Z")
If any of my ancestors manifest, and they donā€™t smell like brimstone, I am going to be very suspicious of the veracity of the experience. ---
**Author:** ![Furious\_Marmot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dfb087/32.png) [@Furious\_Marmot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Furious_Marmot)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2013, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/27 "2013-01-29T14:28:36Z")
Harry Houdini certainly didnā€™t, even though he and his wife set up a pretty dang good experimental protocol. Maybe he changed his mind after being dead. ---
**Author:** ![kaoticharmony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/d78d45/32.png) [@kaoticharmony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaoticharmony)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/28 "2013-01-30T15:17:40Z")
I have a cat who has repeated visited me. At first it was in my dreams and he talked. Then in one dream he was upset. He said there was a cat I had to find. She was young and had suddenly died and didnā€™t know she was dead. She was depressed because she finally felt better and everybody was ignoring her. I didnā€™t really know what to doā€¦how could I find this cat? I was at a group Iā€™m regularly at and a friend mentioned that she had suddenly lost her 2 year old cat. I didnā€™t have the confidence to approach this woman and that night my cat was there again and confirmed she was the one. I finally approached the her and told her about my cat. We talked for quite awhile about what to doā€¦and a few more times after that. Then my cat shows up again and said her cat was doing better, but wanted an outside water dish and wanted her owner to know that she liked the springy plants she planted at her grave. They are fun to play with. After she finished crying she told me about these ā€œspringyā€ plants she had planted knowing her cat would love them. My cat has done this many times since and has helped alot of people deal with their grief. As time went on (itā€™s been almost 2 years) I hear him when Iā€™m awake sometimes. Recently this one woman was really in a bad way. I had relayed many messages which helped. My cat was still sad for her and her deceased cat. He kept saying that her cat loves to see her smile ā€¦and she doesnā€™t smile anymore. This came up with her a few nights later while we were talking on line along with something else he kinda whispered in my earā€¦ Her cat missed her dancing. She talked about a few other things then went back to that and asked if there was anything else about it. Sometimes itā€™s hard for him to put things into words and heā€™ll send a feeling or an image. It was a very happy feelingā€¦very closeā€¦ spinningā€¦her laughing and smiling. I relayed all this to her and she said OH my Godā€¦several timesā€¦then she added no one knows thatā€¦ it was our secret. I used to waltz with him. I felt this happiness and my cat said sheā€™s smiling! I told he said sheā€™s smilingā€¦and she said I amā€¦crying tooā€¦but Iā€™m smiling!!! She talked a few minutes longer and she said she needed to go do somethingā€¦ she said she wanted to go waltz with her husband. Since then she has continued to improve and is much happier. Every time he has done this towards the end he always comes up with something to prove himselfā€¦things I couldnā€™t know. He has helped about a dozen people who have lost their cats. The last woman sent some of her cats ashes and asked me to sprinkle them over my catā€™s grave. I have considered that it could just be meā€¦ but there is a feel to it especially when he doesnā€™t have or know a word. Itā€™s hard to describe. Whatever is happening it has helped alot of people. I knew when he died that Iā€™d see him again. He is an amazing catā€¦anyone who knew him had stories. He was like a little person stuck in a cat suitā€¦lolā€¦ He is a very old and wise soul. ---
**Author:** ![kaoticharmony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/d78d45/32.png) [@kaoticharmony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaoticharmony)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/29 "2013-01-30T18:53:35Z")
I might end up regretting the above post. I didnā€™t realize there were so many closed minded people here. How can you say that something isnā€™t real or doesnā€™t exist just because you donā€™t believe in it or accept it? Just because Science doesnā€™t have an explanation or support it doesnā€™t mean it isnā€™t true. It just means it isnā€™t within the reach of Science yet. Think of all the things Science used to doubt and now accepts. You should never approach something you donā€™t understand with a closed mindā€¦caution and doubt? Yesā€¦ but so many things can defy explanation. That doesnā€™t mean they are not real or true. Has science stumbled back enough to dismiss the world of Metaphysics? Iā€™m sure you probably felt my story was hystericalā€¦ it is about a cat afterallā€¦which probably made you laugh harderā€¦ How can you explain things he has told meā€¦ They were not things I knew. I have alot of other examples of things he saidā€¦ So far he hasnā€™t been wrong. There are alot of people out there who are fakes and take advantage of people when it comes to the unknown. They rip them off for their savings etc. Iā€™m not one of them. I donā€™t believe in asking anything when it comes to helping someone. . So you think when you die everything just endsā€¦maybe for you it will, because that is what you believe. What a sad view. I do believe the body, of course endsā€¦but with the little we understand about the mind how can you say consciousness (which I agree is a type of energy) dies tooā€¦Who is to say it doesnā€™t just leave the bodyā€¦ I have no idea, but I know there is alot more to it than we can conceive. I donā€™t believe we go to heaven or hell ā€¦ but I also donā€™t dismiss what is unknownā€¦or should I say not proven yet. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/30 "2013-01-30T18:58:03Z")
Most of us are very open-minded to reality. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/31 "2013-01-30T19:08:26Z")
Iā€™m open-minded to paragraph breaks. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/32 "2013-01-30T19:41:02Z")
Iā€™m sorry for the loss of your mind ā€¦I mean, cat. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/33 "2013-01-30T20:27:26Z")
Holy Shitā€¦ itā€™s a ghost cat!!! ---
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/34 "2013-01-30T20:41:40Z")
> [@PandaBear77](#): > > 1. I think it happens sometimes. > > 2. Itā€™s happened to me once, in a dream when a teacher died. About a month after my mom died, she showed up in a friendā€™s dream and told her how happy she is. Those are just called ā€œdreamsā€, not contact from the afterlife. ---
**Author:** ![Jake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/35 "2013-01-30T20:53:58Z")
Two words: _Pet Sematary_ ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/36 "2013-01-30T22:19:34Z")
Depends on your spiritual path. There are a lot of atheists who will say itā€™s impossible (especially on this board); just as there are a lot of pagans who will say that it is possible. Iā€™ve experienced it, and do so semi-regularly. (We recently moved next door to a cemetery, so Iā€™ve experienced more since then.) Most often when Iā€™m awake, FWIW ā€“ I rarely remember my dreams. Iā€™m sure thereā€™s a ton of people who will insist that I havenā€™t, but they werenā€™t here and are not in my head to have experienced what I have. Youā€™ll have to come to your own conclusions. Thatā€™s the best you can hope for in this lifetime. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/37 "2013-01-30T22:24:57Z")
> [@Kaio](#): > > Depends on your spiritual path. There are a lot of atheists who will say itā€™s impossible (especially on this board); just as there are a lot of pagans who will say that it is possible. > > Iā€™ve experienced it, and do so semi-regularly. (We recently moved next door to a cemetery, so Iā€™ve experienced more since then.) Most often when Iā€™m awake, FWIW ā€“ I rarely remember my dreams. Iā€™m sure thereā€™s a ton of people who will insist that I havenā€™t, but they werenā€™t here and are not in my head to have experienced what I have. > > Youā€™ll have to come to your own conclusions. Thatā€™s the best you can hope for in this lifetime. You say you can barely remember your dreams so because you remember these incidents they couldnā€™t possibly be dreams? 1. You are getting better at remembering some of your dreams. 2. You are being visited by ghosts. Please explain why you believe the latter over the former. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2013, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/38 "2013-01-30T23:40:32Z")
Because I was wide awake at the time. I already said this up above, there. Iā€™m really not interested in debating the veracity of my spiritual experience, here. You donā€™t believe it, you wonā€™t believe it, I get it. I donā€™t care whether you believe it. Whatever makes you happy. ---
**Author:** ![TimeWinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bcef8e/32.png) [@TimeWinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TimeWinder)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/39 "2013-01-31T00:20:12Z")
> [@Kaio](#): > > Depends on your spiritual path. There are a lot of atheists who will say itā€™s impossible (especially on this board); just as there are a lot of pagans who will say that it is possible. Not all possible explanations are equally likely, even in the absence of certainty. The number of people who believe something has absolutely no effect on its truth or falsehoodā€“or we could just do science by voting. It would be trivially easy to demonstrate this: just have a dead person pass a verifiable piece of knowlege that only they knew to a loved one. And yet, itā€™s never happened. The ā€œpagans who will say that it is possibleā€ are mistaken. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2013, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596/40 "2013-01-31T00:37:11Z")
> [@TimeWinder](#): > > Not all possible explanations are equally likely, even in the absence of certainty. The number of people who believe something has absolutely no effect on its truth or falsehoodā€“or we could just do science by voting. > > It would be trivially easy to demonstrate this: just have a dead person pass a verifiable piece of knowlege that only they knew to a loved one. And yet, itā€™s never happened. > > The ā€œpagans who will say that it is possibleā€ are mistaken. You missed the last paragraph of my post. I would also be really nice if we could have a civilized discussion about this. The OP asked a question, and just as the atheists have a right to offer their perspective, so I have the right to offer mine. Although you may have noticed that I havenā€™t gone about saying that all the atheists are deluded and wrong. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-loved-ones-contact-us-after-death/648596.md?page=3)