# Do most Christians literally think Jesus was a tall white guy with blue eyes? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 17, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460 "2010-10-17T17:56:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/81 "2010-10-18T21:37:25Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Obviously untrue. Faced with the task of crossing a lake, he walked ON the water. Being a swimmer is not a prerequisite for having a hot swimmer’s bod. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/82 "2010-10-18T21:38:50Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Well, that’s accurate. (It might be the only actually accurate thing he said in that argument.) > > Another question is if Jesus was illiterate? > I remember a story of him at age 12 impressing rabbis at the temple with how well he understood the law. But I don’t remember it specifically saying that he could actually read the Torah. Nor do I recall any incident in the New Testament where he is recorded as having written anything. As an adult he taught at least once his home town’s synagogue, pissing off the townsfolk enough so that they attempted to toss him off a cliff; he had to do a Kitty Pryde to escape. And he himself was called Rabbi. I think it’s pretty clear that he could read & write. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/83 "2010-10-18T22:05:26Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > That was me. > > Only the lyrics were ‘Five-foot-nine, so divine…’ > > The ‘six-foot-two, solid blue’ reference was to an Allan Sherman parody of _Has Anybody Seen My Gal_, in which the ‘gal’ in question is a Martian. > > Not that it’s germane to the OP. Just setting the reference straight. 😉 Link?🆒 ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/84 "2010-10-18T22:15:15Z")
> [@Enter\_the\_Flagon](#): > > and was genetically half god/half human. That would be a Nephlium Described as a ‘mighty men, men of renown’ in the OT. That would pretty much set Him apart from the general population in appearance. ---
**Author:** ![Randy\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee7513/32.png) [@Randy\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Randy_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/85 "2010-10-18T22:44:41Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > That would be a Nephlium > > Described as a ‘mighty men, men of renown’ in the OT. That would pretty much set Him apart from the general population in appearance. Wait, do I gather from your reverential capitals that you’re saying that Jesus was one of the Nephilum? The bible says Jesus was unremarkable in appearance: the Roman soldiers could not tell him apart from his disciples, and needed a signal from Judas Iscariot to pick him out of the crowd. Matthew 26:48; Mark 14:44. Are you saying The Bible is wrong? If so, I won’t disagree with you. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/86 "2010-10-18T23:00:10Z")
> [@John\_DiFool](#): > > Well, of the first three actors to have played Jesus that I can think of off the top of my head, 2 had pale eyes: Jeffrey Hunter and Willem Dafoe. Fortunately they got it right with James Caviezel. Jim Caviezel’s a white guy with blue eyes, and he’s six two. How did they get it right there? ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/87 "2010-10-18T23:04:41Z")
> [@Susanann](#): > > He did not have blue eyes, He did not have black skin, nor did He have slanted eyes. > > I always assumed every adult knew that. > > Jesus looked like a Jew. Lots of Jews have blue eyes. And, to be honest, I suspect a lot of your less educated Christians do think he had blue eyes. I know at least one. My best friend’s parents become born-agains a few years back. They wanted an interactive Bible for their computer, so he got the best one he could find, as a Christmas present. When it was loaded up and his Mom was shuffling through it, she was frankly amazed to see pictures of Mary and Jesus and such looking like, well, like people living in the Middle East two thousand years ago. She just could not get her head around the fact that they weren’t white Anglo-Saxon Americans. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/88 "2010-10-18T23:24:42Z")
> [@Randy\_Seltzer](#): > > Wait, do I gather from your reverential capitals that you’re saying that Jesus was one of the Nephilum? > > The bible says Jesus was unremarkable in appearance: the Roman soldiers could not tell him apart from his disciples, and needed a signal from Judas Iscariot to pick him out of the crowd. Matthew 26:48; Mark 14:44. > > Are you saying The Bible is wrong? If so, I won’t disagree with you. Are you saying Jesus was not a mighty man? [QUOTE=Isaiah 52:] 13 See, my servant will act wisely \*\* ; he will be raised and lifted up and highly exalted. 14 Just as there were many who were appalled at him [c]— his appearance was so disfigured beyond that of any man and his form marred beyond human likeness— 15 so will he sprinkle many nations, and kings will shut their mouths because of him. For what they were not told, they will see, and what they have not heard, they will understand. [/QUOTE] It is apparent from scripture that before His glory Jesus will be despised, after which He will be exalted when God opens their eyes. So yes it’s both, He is unremarkable in appearance till God has revealed Jesus as His Son, after which He is made King of everything - sounds like a mighty man to me. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/89 "2010-10-18T23:29:33Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Are you saying Jesus was not a mighty man? Your god used a whip to clear the money-changers from the temple. My god has :: checks heresy schedule :: Sig Sauer issued him by NCIS. He’d have done it faster. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/90 "2010-10-18T23:46:39Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Your god used a whip to clear the money-changers from the temple. My god has > > :: checks heresy schedule :: > > Sig Sauer issued him by NCIS. He’d have done it faster. Have you not seen [AR Jesus](http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Uploads/Graphics/001-0820140508-Jesus-AR15.jpg)? Fucketh not with him. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/91 "2010-10-19T00:05:34Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#): > > Have you not seen [AR Jesus](http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Uploads/Graphics/001-0820140508-Jesus-AR15.jpg)? Fucketh not with him. How does AR Jesus keep His hair our of His face? ---
**Author:** ![B.Serum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/b.serum/32/14266_2.png) [@B.Serum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Serum)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/92 "2010-10-19T01:26:51Z")
> [@drhess](#): > > They are aware of what he probably looked like or of what he didn’t look like? Two different things. Ditto. While I’m sure that on some level when the faithful see [this](http://progressivelylutheran.files.wordpress.com/2010/07/jesus_blond31246138290-45812521.jpg), they know it’s at best _one_ approximation of what he looked like, there’s a world of difference between that depiction and envisioning the[guy who’s liable to get searched at the airport](http://www.popularmechanics.com/science/health/forensics/1282186). ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/93 "2010-10-19T02:40:03Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Well, that’s accurate. (It might be the only actually accurate thing he said in that argument.) > > Another question is if Jesus was illiterate? > I remember a story of him at age 12 impressing rabbis at the temple with how well he understood the law. But I don’t remember it specifically saying that he could actually read the Torah. Nor do I recall any incident in the New Testament where he is recorded as having written anything. Jesus and the adulteress, from the Gospel of John > [@](#): > > John 8:3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group > John 8:4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. > John 8:5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” > John 8:6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. > But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. > John 8:7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” > John 8:8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. Jesus was, at least, a doodler. ---
**Author:** ![Randy\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee7513/32.png) [@Randy\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Randy_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/95 "2010-10-19T03:30:26Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > > [@Randy\_Seltzer](#): > > > > Wait, do I gather from your reverential capitals that you’re saying that Jesus was one of the Nephilum? > > > > The bible says Jesus was unremarkable in appearance: the Roman soldiers could not tell him apart from his disciples, and needed a signal from Judas Iscariot to pick him out of the crowd. Matthew 26:48; Mark 14:44. > > > > Are you saying The Bible is wrong? If so, I won’t disagree with you. > > Are you saying Jesus was not a mighty man? I can only speak to what’s in the scripture of your religion, which seems to disagree with you. I guess that, yes, I am saying that, based on the text I cited above, Jesus was not a “mighty man” in outward appearance. And since this thread is concerned only with his outward appearance, I see no reason to discuss whether he glowed internally with all the colors of the rainbow. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/96 "2010-10-19T03:36:08Z")
> [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](#): > > > [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > > > That was me. > > > > Only the lyrics were ‘Five-foot-nine, so divine…’ > > > > The ‘six-foot-two, solid blue’ reference was to an Allan Sherman parody of _Has Anybody Seen My Gal_, in which the ‘gal’ in question is a Martian. > > > > Not that it’s germane to the OP. Just setting the reference straight. 😉 > > Link?🆒 > **[Has anybody seen my Lord?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=581427)** > > \*Five foot nine, so divine Changes water into wine Has anybody seen my Lord? Walks so tall, walks so cool He walked across my swimmin’ pool Has anybody seen my Lord? My name is Jesus, the son of God I came from Heaven just to save your bod My... ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/97 "2010-10-19T06:43:20Z")
I still have no problem with the Shroud, if a hoax, to still be a replica of a valid tradition of Jesus’ appearance. And it’s doesn’t show a particularly attractive fellow with a thin nose. More of a hangdog look- David Schwimmer or Jeff Goldblum if you want a Jewish actor, a middle-aged Harry Dean Stanton if a Gentile. [Biblical Evidence for Catholicism: Trinitarianism and Christology (Index Page for Dave Armstrong)](http://socrates58.blogspot.com/2006/11/trinitarianism-christology-index-page.html) (I think the artist thins out the nose more than a face-value look at the Shroud justifies.) ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/98 "2010-10-19T06:48:55Z")
> [@FriarTed](#): > > I collect JW pamphlets & books. The OLD ones (1930s-40s) actually had him as clean-shaven with wavy short hair & button nose, but they were black & white drawings. All the ones I’ve seen from the 1960s onward & in color have him as dark-haired, dark-eyed, a bit tan but definitely Caucasian. > > I’m wondering if the ones you’ve seen with him light-haired & blue-eyed were actually Seventh-Day Adventist or Mormon… as in… > > [http://www.lightbearerssda.org/Home/jesus-bible-14g.jpg?attredirects=0](http://www.lightbearerssda.org/Home/jesus-bible-14g.jpg?attredirects=0) > an SDS site > > [http://ldsartcollector.com/blog/index.php/2008/10/30/harry-anderson-mormon-artist/](http://ldsartcollector.com/blog/index.php/2008/10/30/harry-anderson-mormon-artist/) > a Mormon site Nope, definitely JW. The JWs can be men or women and do not wear badges; the women tend to look frumpy and the men, if young, like the tie is about to strangle them. The Mormons are dudes who look like they just stepped out of a corporate recruitment poster and wear badges “Brother This” and “Brother That”. I’ve seen someone accept the JW’s offerred papers out of a desire to just keep on walking and then look at the cover and say “where the heck do you come up with him being a _blonde_? are you kidding me?” ETA: it’s possible that you guys consider “light brown” what for a Spaniard is “dark blonde”. We figure that if he’d been a blonde it would have been mentioned in scripture, same as it was mentioned for King David, blonde being unusual among Jews. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 10:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/99 "2010-10-19T10:14:16Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > We figure that if he’d been a blonde it would have been mentioned in scripture, same as it was mentioned for King David, blonde being unusual among Jews. King David was blond? I have to honestly say I do not ever remember reading anything about his being blond. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/100 "2010-10-19T10:16:33Z")
There’s mention of his being light haired when Samuel goes to find him, IIRC. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460/101 "2010-10-19T10:37:13Z")
[Raises hand] Former Christian here who, during childhood, went to a church where congregants, both white and black, prayed to a honkin’ huge statue of the auburn-haired (beautifully coiffed, by the way), blue-eyed, white Jesus. This was in Kansas, in the late '60s / early '70s, and I don’t know if this was the norm there and then, but I do know that my mom, who is black, believed that is how Jesus actually looked, and was visibly disturbed/disgusted when it was suggested otherwise. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-most-christians-literally-think-jesus-was-a-tall-white-guy-with-blue-eyes/557460.md?page=6)