# Do Women have to do EVERY DAMN THING???

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 10, 2000, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741 "2000-01-10T17:45:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/21 "2000-01-11T03:57:00Z")

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Um, that would be ‘exasperation’ ye mean there, The Ryan. I hope.

I’m tryin’ my best here smilingjaws, but fer the life of Augustine I can’t figure out what yer goin’ on about exactly. It appears on the surface that yer lookin’ fer someone to ratify yer definition of ‘responsibility’, but only as it applies to the XY of the species.

I might have missed class that day, but I don’t remember anyone askin’ fer my opinion of whether I’d like to take responsibility fer childbirth. That aside, somehow the bills get paid, the house gets cleaned, the kids get slopped and their pens get mucked out, the homework goes in, the snow gets shoveled, and the pizza boxes never get much over three deep in the corners. This while me ex is cavortin’ in Lord only knows which country and still sendin’ me the bills.

All by way of illuminating that there’s immature spineless idiots on both sides of the great divide. My experience of folks who feel that they have to ‘Do Everything’ has usually left me with a taste of someone’s superiority complex in me mouth. The self-proclaimed ‘reason’ they must do ‘everything’ is generally because only they are qualified to decide what needs to be done, and exactly when. (My ex used to jump up and start running the sweeper in the middle of reading the Sunday newspaper by way of demonstrating the depth of her ‘martyr complex’.)

Sounds like so much “nobody warned me that life was going to be hard” nonsense from here.

BTW, she hasn’t chimed in on this board herself yet, but MsCrick (who shares this SN with me) wanted me to ask if anyone can remember the last time an XY made a ‘To Do’ list and handed it to an XX? It’d make a bleedin’ spectacle to be remembered.  
Dr. Watson  
“The richest man is not the man who has the most but the man who needs the least.”

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/22 "2000-01-11T04:11:00Z")

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Dang! Ye beat me to the exacerbation condemnation special. At least we’re all in agreement about one thing.  
Dr. Watson  
“There is nothing women hate so much as to see men selfishly enjoying themselves without the solace of feminine society.”  
-Katharine Tynan Hinkson

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**Author:** ![PitBullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@PitBullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PitBullDawg)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/23 "2000-01-11T04:15:00Z")

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Well I suppose since men have invented EVERYTHING SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME, it’s about time women started doing something. Geez, we even have to design their clothes (you don’t actually think a woman invented high heels or wire bras?)

* * *

The ever insensitive, politically incorrect PitBullDawg.  
Political correctness is a disease. Cure it with the truth.

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**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/24 "2000-01-11T04:54:00Z")

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I trust that we are all intelligent enough here not to respond to the moronic and ill-informed statements made by the ingoramus who posted above me. He calls himself a “pit bull lover” for a reason, folks.

> [@](#):
>
> Men are so easy.

What? Please! They are the ones who came jumping all over **me**. Psssht. I’m hardly easy.

* * *

I’m not perky.

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**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/25 "2000-01-11T04:58:00Z")

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heh… that would be “ignoramus”. Heh. Oh well.

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**Author:** ![PitBullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@PitBullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PitBullDawg)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/26 "2000-01-11T05:09:00Z")

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I see the truth hurts simple minds like yours Alphlegm. But it is true that men did invent everything. Pieces of shit like you should stay confined to your toilet.

btw-the reason would be because i love pit bulls. would you like to meet mine you piece of cat dung loser?

* * *

The ever insensitive, politically incorrect PitBullDawg.  
Political correctness is a disease. Cure it with the truth.

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**Author:** ![PitBullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@PitBullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PitBullDawg)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/27 "2000-01-11T05:11:00Z")

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Sorry, I don’t know why I responded to a nutless wonder like Alphlegm. My mistake. I didn’t realize you had no balls until I read some of your other comments. My bad.

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**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/28 "2000-01-11T05:56:00Z")

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You guys hear something?

Nah, didn’t think so.

* * *

I’m not perky.

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/29 "2000-01-11T06:56:00Z")

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Um, not to be argumentative, but have ye no leash laws around here?

Yo LapDog! The subject at hand is personal responsibility. Specifically that of the male of the human species.

Ye set yer own argument back a few thousand years by cocking off like a retrograde sophomore with a hormone problem. If ye wish to argue that men have invented “EVERYTHING SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME”, we’ll all be happy to entertain yer arguments, (and be entertained by them, in turn), but be cautioned by the knowledge that men also invented logical premises, and the requirement that they be followed out to supportable conclusions.

Ye can use this board the way a drunken man uses a lamppost if ye wish, and will find the support ye desire rather than the illumination ye clearly need. That would be up to you.

If ye care to expound on, “. . .it’s about time women started doing something,” we’d all be pleased as punch to hear yer take on the situation. If ye find the flesh flayed from yer bones minutes later please don’t blame me fer sayin’ “I told ya so.”  
Dr. Watson  
“Defender of the Realm since 1957. Don’t be fooled by cheap imitations.”

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**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/30 "2000-01-11T07:30:00Z")

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Now **that’s** the kind of eloquence that garners respect around here. Take heed, PittyBoy. Just because you spout fecal matter and stamp it as “Truth” doesn’t make it so.

Interesting. Pitty posts calmly when it comes to doggie information and what not, but when the topic of women comes up… oofah! Plucked from various threads around the board:

> [@](#):
>
> Why is it, MEN, that women are allowed to be as rude and hostile as they like and are never called on it. But let a man say something a woman doesn’t like and it’s like the fucking world has ended. I’m so sick of wimpy pussy men.
> 
> It’s a rare find when you find a reasonable woman.
> 
> …you laid back and spread your legs so you could get pregnant hoping, like a lot of women, to trap a man.
> 
> Just goes to show ya, women aren’t capable of raising kids alone.
> 
> Geez, women today need to wake up. No wonder there’s so many of them left alone with their bastard kids, they don’t deserve a decent man.

This is why I was so quick to dismiss Pitty’s ramblings about men inventing everything. Which is why, obviously, I have “no balls”. I guess the spectre of gender equality has Pitty shaking his cute little doggie paws in fear.

On final gem from out favorite quadruped:

> [@](#):
>
> Maybe I just enjoy the fact that someone else will read [one of my posts] and react to it somehow. Now that, my virtual friends, is power.

Unless of course your posts are a source of mockery to others. Then that, my virtual friends, is pathetic.

* * *

I’m not perky.

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**Author:** ![PitBullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@PitBullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PitBullDawg)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/31 "2000-01-11T08:25:00Z")

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The subject at hand was not “personal responsibility”. It was “women do all the work”.

To that I say, then don’t. It doesn’t bother me if a dish sits in the sink for a day or 2. If it bothers you then get off your ass and clean it. I work all week and I’ll be damned if I’m going to be a slave to my own home just so some neighbor won’t say bad things about me. I mean be honest, the thing on every womens mind is “what will \_\_\_\_ think if they see my house in a mess?”.

And the fact still remains, men invented everything and have always worked harder then women (until recently, say the last 15-20 years). Women have ALWAYS had the option of staying home (whether they had kids or not). The only option for men has ALWAYS BEEN WORK. \<----period

Does that bother us? Hell no! We are adventurerers, explorers, conquerors, protectors, breadwinners, hunters, INVENTORS :-p. We need life to be a challenge. We like to take care of our women and families and we love it when the take care of us (or we used to until they became what a lot of them are today, whiners, complainers, bitchy, nothings-ever-good-enough-because-someone-else-has-more-and-we-need-to-catch-up-materialistic-i-wantwantwant). Do I sound bitter? I’m not. Cynical? Probably. Not all women are like that, and I happen to have one that isn’t now. (btw- she thinks a lot of the women on here are pathetic as well) Well ladies look around at what equality has gotten you. Jobs that make you stress out to the point you become a zanax junkie. Husbands that tire of your shit and dump you for a younger more friendlier, more humble and submissive face. Oops! Did I say submissive? I forgot that’s a bad word! I think if women would learn the golden rule you’d see men sticking around a lot more: You catch more flies with honey then you do with vinegar.  
A source of mockery to others???

BING-FUCKING-O!!!

I have read Cecil’s columns for years and when I came on this board and saw some of the ridiculous topics on here and I realized how many people come on here to try and resolve there personal problems, as if anyone on here really gave a damn about them, well I just had to laugh. So I respond to them in a demeaning manner because I think you people that come on here with topics like “Talk To Me” (about kellibelli and her date with death) and “Sexual Harrassment” (about some grown up that is offended because some of the people in her office like each other a little too much in her prescence. although she never did say if she had the guts to tell those people to stop it because her panties were getting into a wet wad) Well I just take it as an open invitation to point out the obvious, that this is not the medium for those things. Surely there is a psych site somewhere that you can take all that ridiculous stuff too.

Love ya!

* * *

The ever insensitive, politically incorrect PitBullDawg.  
Political correctness is a disease. Cure it with the truth.

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**Author:** ![special](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/special)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/32 "2000-01-11T14:42:00Z")

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hmm, so, alph, if yer not easy, that means yer hard . . .? i do like that in a man.

& crick, i think i’m in love: an eloquent man who can reason & has an accent. {sigh} oh, here, let me get that door for you while you take out the pizza boxes.

btw, psycat, you go scot-free in my rant above. takes balls to _choose_ to raise 2 kids alone. & then not whine about it. {blows a kiss}

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**Author:** ![cleosia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@cleosia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cleosia)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/33 "2000-01-11T15:53:00Z")

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Pitty’s historyical accuracy is a little off. The only women who could to choose to stay home or not were the upper or ruling class women. Working class women most times did just that – worked. A farmers wife was up before her husband to prepare breakfast, got to work the farm with him and was still cleaning up after supper while her husband was able to sit and have his smoke or drink. The sweatshops were full of working women who were hired specifically because they could be paid less for back-breaking, STRESSFUL labor that they would hardly have chosen to do. They did it out of desparate economic necessity. So let’s not try to make out that all through history women have had a grand old time and any problems they have, they’ve brought onto themselves by demanding _GASP_ equal treatment!

And by the way, men have not invented everything, although they seem to like to take the credit whether deserved or not.

* * *

Bitch by Birth

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**Author:** ![psycat90](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/34 "2000-01-11T15:57:00Z")

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Makes you wonder about that old saying " Necessity is the **Mother** of invention."

* * *

so you found a girl who thinks really deep thoughts. what’s so amazing about really deep thoughts? Tori Amos

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**Author:** ![special](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/special)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/35 "2000-01-11T16:55:00Z")

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cleosia (what a lovely name!), let’s not get our historical perspective & our current perspective confused. the last thing i would want is to be seen as allied w/ pity (talk about anal retentive), but the situations in which our foremothers found themselves is only barely analogous to where we are now.

we have laws to equalize & balance things out that would never have been considered in the past except in a few rare pockets of civilization. we still have a lot of women w/ little education & skills who, left by spouses, have little else to turn to but low-paying, back-breaking jobs plus public assistance, not a lot different than those women in the past (except, of course, they didn’t have much then in the way of public assistance beyond church alms).

however, we now have opportunities for equal pay & promotion that were never dreamed of. we have avenues of communication, e.g. marriage counselors, self-help books, support groups, available that should leave no one feeling martyred but those who are unwilling to help themselves.

personally, i have stayed single (after an old-fashioned 13 yr marriage to my childhood sweetheart) for nearly 20 yrs because i couldn’t bear the thought of having someone control my life again. if i make a mistake, dammit, it’s _my_ mistake & i know i’ll learn from it. i believe people belong together; they’re programmed to help each other. i would love to find someone who wanted to take care of me but understood that i can take care of myself pretty damn well, thank you very much.

if i find him, will i expect him to know to take out the garbage because that’s what _i_ expect of him? not unless i have explained to him first that i’m terrified of the evil space monster that lurks inside the dumpster! will we have discussed that i expect we will have sex daily? oh, yeah. will i feel we should ‘share chores’? no, because i will do what is important to me & expect him to do what is important to him. no mind reading. no pity party.

* * *

Stay with me folks, I’m certain I’m driving towards a conclusion here, but I refuse to stop and ask for directions.  
Baloo

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**Author:** ![cleosia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@cleosia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cleosia)\
**Post date:** [January 12, 2000, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/36 "2000-01-12T06:59:00Z")

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Actually, Special, I was responding to part of pitty’s rant:

"And the fact still remains, men invented everything and have always worked harder then women (until recently, say the last 15-20 years). Women have ALWAYS had the option of staying home (whether they had kids or not). The only option for men has ALWAYS BEEN WORK. \<----period "

I was addressing that in the past WOMEN had to work harder than men and didn’t have any options regarding whether they stayed home or not. If you were poor, you worked outside the home, if you were upper class, you usually weren’t allowed to work outside the home. It reflected badly on the husband (everything came back to male ego, it seems) Today, women have more choices, but a lot of the choice is still dictated by economic necessity. I was able to take nine months off when my daughter was born, but was not able to stay home and raise my daughter. Hmm, maybe some things don’t change.

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**Author:** ![special](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/special)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/37 "2000-01-11T19:33:00Z")

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oh, yeah, cleo, but he’s an asshole. his view of history is entirely personally revisionist.

i believe you & i essentially agree as long as you’re not trying to say that women have always done, & continue to do, most of the work, take most of the responsibility. altho there surely are circumstances where we see mothers & children abandoned, we also see fathers & children abandoned. unlike in the past, there _are_ now laws to aid women in lousy conditions.

my primary point is still that for women in essentially good situations, e.g., a 2-parent household, sniveling about the spouse not being able to read your mind is pretty self serving.

likewise, for a single woman to wait for prince charming to sweep her off her feet is frightfully sexist & no better than the silliness in the ‘why don’t nice guys get laid’ thread.

* * *

Stay with me folks, I’m certain I’m driving towards a conclusion here, but I refuse to stop and ask for directions. Baloo

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**Author:** ![cleosia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@cleosia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cleosia)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/38 "2000-01-11T19:41:00Z")

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As always, communication is a good thing. My husband is a good guy. He doesn’t smoke, he doesn’t drink, he doesn’t do drugs (no he’s not boring. In our married life, he’s thrown me a few curves!) He does the laundry and the dishes. But anything that is not a constant chore, something done once a week or a day, he sometimes has a problem getting it done without constant reminders. (I repainted the 2 front rooms Christmas of '98. He was supposed to finish touching up the heater covers. I’m still waiting.) So I am kind of the one to be in charge of seeing things get done, and I don’t rely on telepathy. But let’s face it, in most relationships, one person takes charge and the other kind of follows. Sometimes it’s the husband. In most, not all, of the couples I’ve been aquainted with, it’s been the wife.

As for waiting for Prince Charming, last I heard, he was broke and looking to marry an heiress!

* * *

Bitch by Birth

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**Author:** ![Jett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/73ab20/32.png) [@Jett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jett)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/39 "2000-01-11T20:25:00Z")

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PitBull - What are you doing here. I quote your post of 2:36 this AM

> [@](#):
>
> Bye y’all. I’ll be back to read Cecil’s columns and writings. But I’ve decided this board is no longer worthy of me.  
> …continues…  
> Well that’s all folks. I don’t know if they will let me post this topic or if they will pull it. Doesn’t matter though, I  
> won’t be back to respond to it.

## (flushing noise)Your credibility is gone.

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps.  
– Emo Phillips

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**Author:** ![Jett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/73ab20/32.png) [@Jett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jett)\
**Post date:** [January 11, 2000, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-women-have-to-do-every-damn-thing/3741/40 "2000-01-11T20:28:00Z")

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Ooops, just noticed that pittbulls post on this board was before his tearful farewell. I guess it remains to be seen whether he makes good on this threat.

Surely he will be back under a pseudonym anyway. It’s never been that easy to take out the trash.

* * *

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps.  
– Emo Phillips

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