# Do you accept strangers on Facebook? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 9, 2017, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897 "2017-09-09T14:51:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/1 "2017-09-09T14:51:43Z")
On Facebook this morning, I see a lady named “Donna” accepted my friend request. The only problem is, I have no idea who Donna is. I know I didn’t intentionally request a friendship with her. So I assume I must have accidentally hit the request button with out realizing it (Although, that seems rather dubious too. Not sure how I could have missed something like that). Anyway, I’m just confused why the heck this lady accepted my friend request. I looked at her profile. From the looks of it, she has an active social life. So it’s not like she’s a lonely old lady desperate for friendship. 😕😕😕 ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/2 "2017-09-09T15:03:07Z")
I won’t accept requests from anyone I don’t know - and by know, I include Dopers with whom I interact, even if we haven’t met _for reals_. I’ve set my account for Friends Only - not that I have great secrets to hide, but I prefer that I’m not sharing things with the whole world. On rare occasions, I’ll change a single post to “Everyone” but mostly not. As for Donna - maybe she defines her self-worth by how many “friends” she has? ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/3 "2017-09-09T15:06:04Z")
My only FB friends are close family and friends that I see on a regular basis. I have about 24 now. I get friend requests quite regularly and dismiss them all. I really don’t care what the friend of a friend of a friend is doing. Also, a sister in law and a grand daughter do a great job of filling my page with all the cute animal crap I need, I don’t need anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/4 "2017-09-09T15:06:10Z")
No, period, end of story. At best, she somehow knows you through some social network or bumped into your somewhere along the line. At worst, she’s just a straight up scammer\*. From the sounds of it, she’s just a social butterfly trying to gather up lots of friends. But in any case, no. I’ll accept friend requests from people I don’t know _well_, but if I don’t know them, then no. \*I know of one case where I got a friend request from someone that I didn’t know but he went to my high school, lot of mutual friends so I accepted him. After a few days someone asked (on facebook) who it was and a bunch of us realized that we all accepted him for the same reason I did. We all just thought everyone else knew him. I checked all my year books and didn’t see his name. The person listed as his wife worked at the same place as an IRL friend of mine so I asked my friend to ask her. Turns out her husband has no such FB page. In the end, it was just a fake page, most likely set up to infiltrate our high school’s social network and, if I had to guess, spy on someone who’s page is private. ETA, I see you sent her the request by mistake. If I were you I’d just unfriend her. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/5 "2017-09-09T15:19:32Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh, Donna, Oh, Donna > Oh, Donna, Oh, Donna > I had a girl > Donna was her name > Since she left me > I’ve never been the same > Cause I love my girl > Donna, where can you be? Where can you be? Some of my best “friends” on Facebook are people I’ve never met face to face. I would not accept a scammer, but every so often circumstances occur and I end up with a friend. ---
**Author:** ![Grumbacher\_Red](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85e7bf/32.png) [@Grumbacher\_Red](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumbacher_Red)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/6 "2017-09-09T15:43:30Z")
No. The strangers who ask me are always men around my age. Makes me suspicious they are just trying to use Facebook as a free dating website. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/7 "2017-09-09T15:46:03Z")
Before I quit Facebook last November, I recall there being a setting where you automatically accept all Friend requests; Donna may have that on. ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/8 "2017-09-09T16:34:30Z")
Pretty much never, although I’ve accepted a few requests from people whose names I couldn’t place at all but whose education information and contacts suggest that we were, in fact, classmates at one time. (Come to think of it, though, that would be a really easy way for someone to infiltrate a social network; pick a random [but real] high school and year of graduation, search for people who really did attend that school around that time, and send friend requests to all of them.) ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/9 "2017-09-09T16:38:44Z")
Extremely rarely, if someone is a member of a group I associate with, and they are friends with other members of that group, I accept friend requests from them. I frequently accept friend requests from people I barely know. I rarely don’t accept friend requests from people I know well, since I try to keep work and non-work separate. I would guess “Donna” is some sort of scammer, or else there was a Facebook glitch. I would probably unfriend her. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/10 "2017-09-09T17:14:27Z")
I accept requests from people I know personally, and will sometimes accept ones from people who I haven’t met but am aware of professionally. Currently I have about 90 friend requests that I haven’t accepted. I have too many things coming in on my Facebook page as it is to have it cluttered up by posts by people I have no knowledge of. ---
**Author:** ![NeonMadman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/58f4c7/32.png) [@NeonMadman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NeonMadman)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/11 "2017-09-09T19:12:28Z")
As I am an ex-Jehovah’s Witness, I used to accept requests from other exJWs, even if I didn’t know them. I’ve given that up, because it led to a situation where well over half of my FB friend list was made up of people that I had no idea as to who they were (except that they were exJWs). I purged the list down to people that I knew in person or had had some amount of online interaction with. The standard is the same now when I get requests. Being an exJW or a friend of a friend doesn’t get you anywhere; I have to know who you are and have either met you in person or had significant online interaction with you. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/12 "2017-09-09T21:32:18Z")
I got a friend request from a guy at work. I looked, and he has 1200 “friends”. He must just collect them for some reason. ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/13 "2017-09-09T21:38:44Z")
No. I recently purged about 60% of all my Facebook friends and deleted just about every post I made back in the day. I went from about 250 “friends” down to less than 100. I also will only accept requests from actual close friends in the future. I felt like the Executioner when I purged all those losers! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2017, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/14 "2017-09-09T23:21:37Z")
Not only won’t I accept requests from people I don’t know, I also don’t always accept from people I do know. Two dozen or so friends is enough. I joined because my grandchildren often posted. Now, however, they mostly use something else and I am really not interested in joining whatever that is. Already FB is so full of ads, it is painful. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/15 "2017-09-10T00:20:29Z")
I have turned down 100% of the strangers who have tried to friend me and 80% of the people I am friends with in real life. Facebook is only something I use for a couple specific meetings/things like Santarchy and I have no desire being active or investing time in it. Having a very small close number of Facebook-Friends just works better for me. ---
**Author:** ![Murderface](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Murderface](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Murderface)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/16 "2017-09-10T00:48:59Z")
I’ll accept them if I have a few friends in common, otherwise no. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/17 "2017-09-10T01:13:28Z")
No. I sometimes accept requests from “single serving friends”, IOW, people I meet out and about socially and hit it off with, but as a practical matter, it’s unlikely we will ever hang out again. Often I defriend them within a year if they are not otherwise connected to my actual social network. Generally, I use social media to enhance my actual social network. That is to say, real-world invitations to events. There is little value for me to add random strangers. LinkedIn I’m a bit more flexible if there is a valid business case for me to accept your request. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/18 "2017-09-10T11:04:18Z")
I wouldn’t assume Donna is a scammer- I know I’ve managed to accidentally send friend requests before, while commenting on a friend’s post. Given the way Facebook works, odds are you share at least one friend in common, and she may be thinking you’re someone she’s met via that friend. No big deal. I fairly regularly get requests from people I don’t know, but have multiple friends in common with. They’re generally part of the same large society/subculture as me, and half the time it turns out I have actually met them at some event or other, or I sometimes meet them afterwards. I don’t post anything really personal on Facebook, so if I decide that actually, no, I don’t want to be in contact with this person I delete 'em, but sometimes the people who friend everyone are good contacts within the society, and are great sources of info and news, even if I never meet them in person. I didn’t accept the stupidly hot blonde Russian girl who I received a request from last week though 😉 ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/19 "2017-09-10T13:09:04Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#): > > Not only won’t I accept requests from people I don’t know, I also don’t always accept from people I do know. Three years ago my sister unfriended me, my brother, and my brother’s son over some humorous post that offended her. I was cool with her action, as her posts are largely glurge, which I hate. Six months ago she sent friend requests to us. I’ve ignored mine. ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2017, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897/20 "2017-09-10T14:02:14Z")
I won’t accept/send a friend request unless I already know you in some manner. I belong to a few private groups, and have friended people from them and vice versa. Most of my FB friends originated online, LOL. The RL people on my list are on a separate filter. They don’t get any details of anything 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-accept-strangers-on-facebook/795897.md?page=2)