# Do you avoid using Starbucks' silly size names? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 26, 2006, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681 "2006-01-26T11:40:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/61 "2006-01-27T23:43:08Z")
> [@Malodorous](#): > > Personally, I think that people feel rather pretencious themselves getting coffee in a Starbucks as opposed to the cheaper gas station down the street, and so take more umbridge at the funky size names then is justified. By “rebeling” against the hoity-toity Italian names, they’re proving their still salt of the Earth, even if they’re paying 2 bucks for a coffee. No offense intended, but this just isn’t true. If 7-11 started calling their sizes ‘Pauce, Intermedio, Grandile, and Gigantor’ I wouldn’t use that either - well, except for Gigantor, but only because I love saying it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/62 "2006-01-28T00:11:35Z")
> [@Malodorous](#): > > Personally, I think that people feel rather pretencious themselves getting coffee in a Starbucks as opposed to the cheaper gas station down the street, and so take more umbridge at the funky size names then is justified. By “rebeling” against the hoity-toity Italian names, they’re proving their still salt of the Earth, even if they’re paying 2 bucks for a coffee. Very interesting analysis! Personally, I’m so super-rebellious that I go to Starbucks AND I don’t even mind the names. Just to show all those other quasi-rebels how silly they are by being there in the first place and then acting like they’re too cool and unpretentious to play along. Yeah! Long live the Venti! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/63 "2006-01-28T00:11:48Z")
> [@wevets](#): > > No offense intended, but this just isn’t true. If 7-11 started calling their sizes ‘Pauce, Intermedio, Grandile, and Gigantor’ I wouldn’t use that either - well, except for Gigantor, but only because I love saying it. 😃 Tell the truth–you just love singing the theme from the old B&W Anime. GI-gaaan-tooor! 😉😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/64 "2006-01-28T00:15:02Z")
I go to Starbucks about four times a year, but when I do I say Venti, etc. Whatthe hell do I care? ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/65 "2006-01-28T00:24:33Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > Tell the truth–you just love singing the theme from the old B&W Anime. GI-gaaan-tooor! 😉😃 You got me :o Sometimes I even rhyme it with “fell right through the second floor.” :o :o ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/66 "2006-01-28T05:45:57Z")
> [@wevets](#): > > > [@malodorous](#): > > > > Personally, I think that people feel rather pretencious themselves getting coffee in a Starbucks as opposed to the cheaper gas station down the street, and so take more umbridge at the funky size names then is justified. By “rebeling” against the hoity-toity Italian names, they’re proving their still salt of the Earth, even if they’re paying 2 bucks for a coffee. > > No offense intended, but this just isn’t true. If 7-11 started calling their sizes ‘Pauce, Intermedio, Grandile, and Gigantor’ I wouldn’t use that either - well, except for Gigantor, but only because I love saying it. 😃 No doubt, I eschew wacky product names at places other then Starbucks, as do many other people, despite the fact that most chains have them. I’m sure I would do it at 7-11 as well. People seem to take special pride or something in asking for a medium coffee at Starbucks that they don’t show when ignoring similar names at other places though, as if they think they’re somehow blowing the baristas mind by not using the weird psuedoitalien naming scheme. So my theories not to explain why people avoid using Starbucks cupsize names as it is to explain why they take such pride in doing so at Starbucks as opposed to at a Krusty burger or other fastfood joint. ---
**Author:** ![Yeeter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/96bed5/32.png) [@Yeeter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeeter)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/67 "2006-01-28T22:41:43Z")
Okay, small Hijack, but I thought it was funny: On the Animaniacs there was an episode where Dr. Scratchenstiff went to the Drive-in. He went in to the concession stand for some treats and this is approximately what happened next: Dr. Scratchensniff: I’ll have a small soda please Spacey Counter-Guy: We don’t have a small. Dr. S: I’ll have a medium soda. SCG: We don’t have a medium. Dr. S: Well what sizes do you have? SCG: We have Large, Chubby and Extra-Chubby. Dr. S: (exasperated) Wouldn’t that make the Large a small? SCG: I’ll have to ask my manager. It was much funnier on the show. Still makes me giggle. ---
**Author:** ![Manatee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/50afbb/32.png) [@Manatee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manatee)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/68 "2006-01-28T23:01:45Z")
> [@Brain Wreck](#): > > Which is an important thing to do, because the servers probably think the cutesy names are really cool and never heard anybody make fun of them. :rolleyes: I don’t do it in the spirit of “You’re such a goober for working in a place that gives its products such silly names. You, Drone 57281, should change the company’s product’s names.” Rather it’s “Yeah buddy, I feel for you, having to call all of these things by these goofy names.” ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2006, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/69 "2006-01-29T00:00:48Z")
While at least they’re using made up non-specific terms for the crap. I went to a bar once that asked me if I wanted my beer as a “small pint” or “large pint” and _neither_ of them were freakin pints, they were 12 and 25 oz. Needless to say I got the large pint so it would do more damage as I smashed it over the managers head. ---
**Author:** ![Lionne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Lionne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lionne)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2006, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/70 "2006-01-29T20:43:40Z")
> [@Yeeter](#): > > Dr. S: Well what sizes do you have? > > SCG: We have Large, Chubby and Extra-Chubby. > > Dr. S: (exasperated) Wouldn’t that make the Large a small? > > SCG: I’ll have to ask my manager. > > It was much funnier on the show. Still makes me giggle. I bet that’s actually happened somewhere, too. Maybe calling larges “Chubbies” is a good thing - I can’t tell you how many times I’ve ordered a large iced mocha from Dunkin Donuts because I \*really \* need to wake up…only to throw away half of it because the thing is fricken huge! If I had to actually say ‘I’ll take a Chubby’ maybe that would kick my brain in gear. Of course, that’s why I’m ordering coffee in the first place, but whatever. ---
**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2006, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/71 "2006-01-29T21:05:09Z")
Hm, I’m not sure I could enjoy a drink named after a [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chubby](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chubby)]half-erect manhood ---
**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2006, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/72 "2006-01-29T21:06:13Z")
Gack, that didn’t work. What I meant, of course was a [half-erect manhood.](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chubby) ---
**Author:** ![Lionne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Lionne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lionne)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/73 "2006-01-30T22:25:15Z")
> [@Speaker for the Dead](#): > > Gack, that didn’t work. What I meant, of course was a [half-erect manhood.](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chubby) :eek: Just when I think I know all the slang… “I’ll take a Chubby this morning…” ~hangs head~ :smack: ---
**Author:** ![pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b9e5f3/32.png) [@pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pretend_my_name_is_witty)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2006, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/74 "2006-01-30T22:45:05Z")
I had a stint working in Starbucks, and even reached the dizzy heights of our store’s **Coffee Master** (No-one else loved coffee enough to do all the tastings and no-one else was nerdy enough to enjoy learning about how it’s made. All things considered, I was definately the best candidate for the job. Wont mention that first bit next time, sounds more impressive!) When I was working there, I’d call the small cups ‘tall’ to customers because they weren’t the smallest availiable, and that didn’t make sense. With the rest, I’d call them whatever the customer looked like they could handle. _“Pint of coffee”_ was a good way to describe the Venti, and _“bigger than you’d think the big would be, but still only medium”_ was the best way to describe Grande! That was quite a cool job actually, I’d quite like to work there again. Maybe this summer. ---
**Author:** ![pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b9e5f3/32.png) [@pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pretend_my_name_is_witty)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2006, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681/75 "2006-01-30T22:51:25Z")
> [@teela brown](#): > > We bought an espresso machine about seven years ago and the question has become moot. Not only do we avoid the whole silly Starbucks experience, we make MUCH BETTER FARKIN’ ESPRESSO! > > Buck the system and become your own barista, too. In the long run, you’ll save money, even factoring in your initial outlay for the machine. I’d love to have my own coffee machine, but we had a brilliant machine (really perfectly set up, sampled regularly and well operated) at my Starbucks and without spending a _lot_ of money, it’d never be as good. Whenever my friends would make espresso from their new machines at home and take me round to try them, it’d taste like a small amount of burnt filter coffee with a hint of ass and plastic. Ugh. Each to their own, though, I’m sure yours is brilliant and I can’t wait to get out of education and into a job where I can afford a proper espresso machine! Oh, and never to have to work in coffee shops again. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-avoid-using-starbucks-silly-size-names/341681.md?page=3)