# Do you bring gifts to a dinner party? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 29, 2012, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425 "2012-05-29T09:06:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/21 "2012-05-29T15:35:47Z")
Ditto the bottle of wine. If asked, something that goes with dinner. Otherwise, something I think the host will enjoy at a future date. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/22 "2012-05-29T16:05:56Z")
Wine, candy, flowers, something. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/23 "2012-05-29T21:36:39Z")
I have usually brought a bottle of wine, but about 10 years ago I discovered how easy it is to make chocolate truffles and I usually bring a dozen or so. They are delicious, festive, and obviously home made and a delightful gift. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/24 "2012-05-29T21:41:31Z")
Bottle of wine as a gift, ask if they need us to pick up anything on our way there (bag of ice, etc.). ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/25 "2012-05-29T21:50:49Z")
I almost always bring a hostess gift when invited to dinner parties. Typically flowers, although sometimes something different depending on circumstances. If it’s just a casual dinner at a family members house, I generally do not. (Occasionally there will be an exception, like I found something the person would like - that’s not really a hostess gift though - more of a ‘hey I thought of you and got this’ idea). ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/26 "2012-05-29T22:09:50Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Wine, candy, flowers, something. Exactly this - with no expectation that it will actually be used on the night, but simply to thank the host for their hospitality. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/27 "2012-05-29T23:45:27Z")
Usually I take a bottle of wine, or some nice beer. Sometimes I take cheesecake or chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/28 "2012-05-29T23:49:45Z")
I usually find out what the hosts favorite booze is and bring a large bottle of that. ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/29 "2012-05-29T23:51:56Z")
It depends. For an informal type of function, I may bring something (and it could well be the specific item that the hosts have asked me to bring). For a more formal dinner party, I don’t take anything. The hosts are throwing the party. They know exactly what they’re going to serve. Bringing along ‘extras’ just seems gauche. ---
**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/30 "2012-05-29T23:53:30Z")
Usually a bottle of wine. And as many people said already, there’s no expectation that it will be served with dinner. It’s a gift for the host(s) to enjoy later. ---
**Author:** ![ladyfoxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ad7895/32.png) [@ladyfoxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladyfoxfyre)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/31 "2012-05-29T23:56:20Z")
Always bring a bottle of wine. It’s not a gesture that your food/drink isn’t good enough, it’s meant as a thank you for providing dinner. Also, my circle of friends likes to drink a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2012, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/32 "2012-05-29T23:57:27Z")
Forgot: I also am often inclined to bring a nice bottle of Scotch. This happens if: A: I know the host likes Scotch and B:I’m too lazy to go out and get wine. (I almost always have a nice bottle of Scotch on the shelf, but don’t keep wine in the house.) ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/33 "2012-05-30T00:03:12Z")
Flowers for sure and dessert if the hostess permits. I hate to show up empty handed. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/34 "2012-05-30T00:37:57Z")
Flowers, wine, something to say thank you. I never come empty handed. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/35 "2012-05-30T03:54:24Z")
Usually flowers. ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/36 "2012-05-30T04:03:40Z")
We always bring something. If it’s casual, we ask what we can bring. Usually we’re told dessert or wine or something. If not, we generally bring wine, a bottle of the hosts preferred liquor, or flowers. But in our circle it’s usually casual and everyone brings a little something. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/37 "2012-05-30T04:08:40Z")
> [@N9IWP](#): > > I’d certainly offer, as in “want me to bring anything?”. . . This. I am part of a quarterly “salon” that gathers at people’s houses. I’m the odd man out, and live in a crummy little apartment, and so cannot host. I always ask if I can do anything to help pay my share. (And the hosts are always very polite and tell me not to.) Once, I was invited to a Passover Dinner – I was the token goy – but I had an informer who told me that the hosts were fond of Mahler, so I gave them an LP. My answer to the poll would have been “Sometimes” or “It Depends.” ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/38 "2012-05-30T07:11:00Z")
I’ve pretty much been brought up with the idea that it is rude not to bring a bottle of wine, so Christ knows how it’d work out if I ever ate at yours. ---
**Author:** ![Norse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a9adbd/32.png) [@Norse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Norse)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2012, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/39 "2012-05-30T07:12:18Z")
Depends on the occasion. For an informal dinner with friends, usually not, but sometimes a bottle of wine. For more formal occasions, some flowers or a bottle of wine. For out-of-country visits or if we’re invited by foreigners, I like to bring some specialty food or drink from my own country. ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2012, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425/40 "2012-06-01T14:23:15Z")
I voted before reading the OP all the way through. To my mind taking food to a dinner party is different than a gift. The way I was taught, taking an unsolicited side dish or dessert implies that the hosts were gonna screw it up. But I was also taught that you don’t go planning to spend time in a person’s home empty handed. Whenever it’s possible I try and have it be something geared to the hosts specifically, but resort to chocolates in a lot of cases. Or if I know they’re coffee drinkers, a pound of coffee from a local place. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-bring-gifts-to-a-dinner-party/623425.md?page=3)