# Do you ever feel or think that actually everyone hates you?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 13, 2009, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891 "2009-09-13T05:45:20Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6bbea6/32.png) [@The\_Seventh\_Deadly\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Seventh_Deadly_Finn)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2009, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891/21 "2009-09-15T01:31:36Z")

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> [@CrazyChop](#):
>
> I can’t seem to take people at their word anymore. Their praises feel fake, everytime if I ask ‘are you fine with me coming?’ I always feel that they are just humoring me. You know, the whole ‘when I’m not looking, the whole universe is actually laughing at my back’ kind of thing?

I’ve been diagnosed with, and treated for, clinical depression since 1992, and this is definitely one of my symptoms-- specifically, the slightly obsessive evaluating of all my relationships and interactions for hidden slights I can use to put myself down.

It’s not that when I’m depressed, I think “they don’t want me here” and when I’m not, I think “they _do_ want me here.” Rather, when I’m not depressed,\* I don’t ask the question at all\*. I’m thinking about something else, not wondering how everyone feels about me.

I’m not a doctor, but I’d consider entertaining the hypothesis that you might be suffering from depression and see where it takes you.

Also, this is going to sound unbelievably glib, but… drink water. Being dehydrated noticeably exacerbates my depression. It took me about 15 years to figure that out-- I hate water. May not help you, but it can’t hurt.\*

(\*Yes, pedants, I know that if you drink 5 gallons you might induce hyponatremia, but staying _normally_ hydrated can’t hurt you. ;))

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**Author:** ![Fetchund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b2d939/32.png) [@Fetchund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fetchund)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2009, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891/22 "2009-09-15T02:07:40Z")

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You are not alone - for me it is a good indication of how bad my depression is getting.

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**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2009, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891/23 "2009-09-15T02:16:00Z")

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I don’t feel like that, and while I know people that do, they all have serious problems with depression. It’s usually the most likable people who take care to always treat other people well that have these thoughts.

Good luck, I hope you stop feeling like this soon.

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**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2009, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891/24 "2009-09-15T02:22:03Z")

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> [@Fetchund](#):
>
> You are not alone - for me it is a good indication of how bad my depression is getting.

Ditto. Even at my best I have trouble believing that even my best friends ‘really’ like me. At my worst, which thankfully isn’t all that often anymore, I’m sure that everyone is talking about me behind my back. Like if my supervisor is meeting with the department manager I wonder if I’m being fired. And don’t get me started on groups of strangers.

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**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2009, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-ever-feel-or-think-that-actually-everyone-hates-you/509891/25 "2009-09-15T02:26:02Z")

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> [@starwarsfreek42](#):
>
> The GM of the first place I ever worked called me into his office one day and told me that I was a bitch and that everyone who worked there hated me. I didn’t quite believe him (I’m sure there were quite a few people there who didn’t hate me, or at least didn’t have any opinion of me) but I did quit a couple weeks later, and when I came to get my last check he asked me why, all innocent and stuff. Whatever.

At my old job my Vice President told me the entire group didn’t like me and thought I was arrogant. While I am arrogant and I’m sure those idiots didn’t want to be my BFF, I had only been there a few weeks so they didn’t really know me, most of my team had input into hiring me so it was their choice that I was there and my VP was known to be a psychotic bitch (she was let go 6 months later).

The point is I don’t care. I know who likes and cares about me and I know who I like and care about. The rest of the world can lick my balls if they have a problem.

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