# Do you have a "Friendsgiving"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 16, 2018, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620 "2018-11-16T15:29:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/1 "2018-11-16T15:29:22Z")
The idea of a “[Friendsgiving](https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/11/millennials-friendsgiving-history/575941/)” is to have a thanksgiving meal just with friends a week or so before the real holiday. Its a great idea because usually the real thanksgiving is celebrated with family and this gives you a chance to do it with friends. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/2 "2018-11-16T15:34:34Z")
We do it after, not before. Hence “Second Thanksgiving”. ---
**Author:** ![EscAlaMike](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/escalamike/32/4177_2.png) [@EscAlaMike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EscAlaMike)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/3 "2018-11-16T16:18:14Z")
We had a “Friendsgiving” on Thanksgiving Day one year. That year, we decided not to travel for the holiday, and we had nobody coming to visit us, so we decided to have a nice, peaceful Thanksgiving at home, just us and the kids. At the last minute, some friends of ours who also had no family around invited us over to their place for Thanksgiving along with a couple of other families, so we took them up on it. It was a very enjoyable time. One of the best Thanksgivings ever, really. ---
**Author:** ![senoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@senoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/senoy)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/4 "2018-11-16T16:53:51Z")
Not typically. I’ve done pre-Thanksgiving with friends before, but it’s rare. Buck rifle season starts on Monday, so people disappear for the three days previous. The weekend before there is always something going on. This year, the oldest is going to a church leadership conference and my wife is speaking there. We also have to balance family time between my family, my wife’s family and my daughter’s birth family, so that eats up time. Then we lose Wednesday cooking for the Community Thanksgiving and lose Thursday actually serving it. That just gives us really the three days after Thanksgiving and honestly, I’m too fooded out by then to think about another major meal, so nope, no ‘Friendsgiving.’ It seems to me like it’s a single Millennial thing when you’re too far from your parents’, but haven’t made your own family yet. ---
**Author:** ![Ashtura](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ashtura/32/2963_2.png) [@Ashtura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtura)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/5 "2018-11-16T16:58:14Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > The idea of a “[Friendsgiving](https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/11/millennials-friendsgiving-history/575941/)” is to have a thanksgiving meal just with friends a week or so before the real holiday. > > Its a great idea because usually the real thanksgiving is celebrated with family and this gives you a chance to do it with friends. We do that, but we’re doing it today, and only with a friend today because she’s not going to be with family on the real day. We generally have a “second thanksgiving” but there is no set date. On Thanksgiving my parents generally insist on us all going out to eat to avoid the fuss (usually to a place that serves turkey dinner), and then our immediately family makes a less formal traditional meal on some other date at home. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/6 "2018-11-16T17:00:45Z")
Yeah. My friend started putting on one a few years ago. It’s kind of turned in to her family + friends so it’s a little weird (like uh…get together with your mom and your cousin some other day…?) but I go cuz the company’s good for the most part. ---
**Author:** ![4d3fect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/4d3fect/32/9728_2.png) [@4d3fect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/4d3fect)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/7 "2018-11-16T23:12:05Z")
Did just that for a few years post-college, a bunch of other local friends were away from their family (or needed to escape from their own local family) and we all got together pot luck style. Actually preferred that to the family Thanksgivings. Looser. Waaaay looser. ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/8 "2018-11-17T01:56:49Z")
I used to go to my best friend’s house Thanksgiving night for leftovers. It was a tradition until we both got old enough that we were never home for holidays. I know my friend and his wife are going to his mom’s this year; if it wasn’t our youngest son’s first THanksgiving home from college I’d think about showing up unannounced on Friday. I last showed up in 1999 to ask my second mom if she was ready to be a mamaw again (my actual mom already knew). ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/9 "2018-11-17T01:59:20Z")
no. I actually can’t wait for the day I no longer have to worry about “celebrating” holidays. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/10 "2018-11-17T13:35:10Z")
We did this thing with the Boy Scouts where we did this troop Thanksgiving dinner where we cooked the turkeys and pies using a type of home-made oven. basically take a big cardboard box. Line the inside with foil. Put hot, burning coals inside and the turkey with that. Oh, and a thermometer. They came out pretty good! Also had the webelos pealing and cutting up the potatoes for mashed potatoes. Nothing more fun than a bunch of webelos going at the potatoes. Anyhow it was all good fun and good food. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/11 "2018-11-17T15:04:26Z")
Hell, we do “Friendsgiving” on Thanksgiving & my family meal on Friday due to the various schedules & other family/in-laws commitments. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/12 "2018-11-17T15:50:04Z")
My daughter’s attending one today. She’s making the mashed potatoes. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/13 "2018-11-17T16:23:51Z")
I’ve sometimes invited “strays” to join us for Passover or Thanksgiving. So, a mix of family and friends. I have groups of friends who get together to celebrate on Thanksgiving day. I’ve never done a separate feast just for friends on the occasion of Thanksgiving or any other “family” holiday. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-have-a-friendsgiving/824620/14 "2018-11-18T12:42:16Z")
At my church there is a dinner on the actual day of Thanksgiving. It’s for folks who don’t have family, or can’t get to them, or simply have nowhere to go on the day. The event was started six or seven years ago by a couple in the church that I’m friends with. I did their wedding cake! Both last year and this year my family will be having our get together on the Sunday before(TODAY!) because several family members work on Thursday. Not in retail, in hospitals. So my mother and I will attend the dinner at church. It was fun last year. The turkey is provided, and everyone brings side dishes. As with most potlucks it turns out well.