“The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea. They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is clear: To build and maintain those robots. Thank you.”
– Rommelwood Military Acadamy Commandant’s graduation address, The Simpsons
THANK you, CrazyCatLady. I just wanted to comment that you were damned lucky if you got bothered by unsolicited recruiters for under a year - I’m quite serious when I tell you that they only just stopped calling me. When I was in college, my mother would tell them that, yes, I was quite serious about continuing with my bachelor’s degree at a small private women’s college and not, you know, the Marine Corps, and one of them said, “Well, you never know!” Really? Really?
I’ll tell ya who we don’t want charging into battle- people that bitch and moan because people (OMG!) call them! On the phone, at home, no less! Can you believe those communist, fascist Nazi recruiters force high school students to take the ASVAB?! FORCE them!!! Those poor, poor souls! Won’t anyone think of the high schoolers?
I hadn’t taken the ASVAB in high school, and sometime around the middle of my junior year, I started getting phone calls. Recruiters can and do get contact information from schools, will call absolutely unsolicited, and for some reason (purely anecdotally), will call over and over and over again.
So, yeah, if you voluntarily take the ASVAB you don’t have much ground to stand on, but lots of teenagers get lots of calls completely unsolicited.
When I was in high school, the Army didn’t bug me TOO much, but the Marines were rather persistent. Which is hilarious if you’ve ever met me. Totally not Marine Corps material. The Air Force, meanwhile, was the exact opposite. We only had one recruiter covering something like three counties around the time I was planning to enlist, so it took me forever just to find the guy in his office.
The final funny bit? After I had been in the Air Force for over two years… I got a packet from the Army trying to get me to enlist. While I am two years into a six year contract with the Air Force. Glad they keep up with these things. 
Then why the hell do they keep on calling them?
I took the ASVAB about a year after I graduated, which was more years ago than I like to think about. Did well enough that the recruiter kept wanting to sign me up in the nuclear engineering section. No idea what my actual score was. I remember that the code and pattern matching was my weakest section, though. I didn’t like the idea of being stuck on a sub soaking up zoomies for 6 months with a bunch of young male assholes, and no privacy to even whack it in the bathroom, so I kept turning him down.
Now, I think young me was a fucking idiot for not taking the Navy up on paying for university and learning something useful. Four to six years seems a hell of a lot shorter than it did at the time.
That was brilliant, thanks!
Oh my god, I loved the mechanic part (I also took it because I got out of class :)). I’m definitely a language person (instead of math) but I’ve always done great on mechanic/spatial things.
I got a 98 composite and only got contacted by the Navy. Repeatedly. They wanted me to be a nuclear engineer, apparently. Hey, man, can’t you see I just wanted to ethically skip class, not actually join?
Where the hell did all you people go to school that you were required to take the ASVAB? I’d never even *heard *of it before this thread. (Private school, graduated in '01.)
Upon graduating high school I was approached by a Navy recruiter and invited to come to the recruiting office to “discuss my future.” I was bored one day that summer so I went to the recruiting office and was put in a little room and administered this test. It was probably a different test than now, this was 15 years ago, but having just graduated my mind was still loaded up with fresh knowledge and I found the test quite easy. The recruiter scored my test and apparently I did very well because he then proceeded to aggressively attempt to sign me up. I declined and went home to prepare to head off to college, but that guy or someone else from the Navy called me every single day that summer.
OTOH, upon looking at the test now, 15 years of debauchery later, I have no idea what half of that shit means.
Public school, class of 97, ASVAB was mandatory and the fucking Navy guy wouldn’t let you go pee unsupervised.
Class of 2000, ASVAB was optional. I can’t remember if I took it or not, but I got hassled by the recruiters too.
Class of 2004- public high school, California. ASVAB was mandatory- they sent the entire senior class in to take it one morning.
I never had any desire to join the military, but for a solid year, I’d get recruiters from every branch knocking on my door a time or two a week. And calling. And sending letters. Craziness. After a while, I just started hitting on them.
For those who really do not understand why some folks cram for the damned thing:
Thank all you hold sacred that you aren’t one of them.
For some, the military is the best option - it is not a matter of “if”, it’s a matter of how and where.
Think of the SAT - the difference being:
Do poorly on the SAT, go to 2nd rate college
Do poorly on this thing, and you get shipped halfway around the world to get your ass shot.
Do well, spend your career behind a desk.
I knew some of these kids in high school (small town, 1 high school for everybody) - they knew they were cannon fodder, but there’s always that hope that maybe, just maybe, you’ll “luck out” and score high enough to leave the rifle behind when you complete Basic.
I just took the advanced math portion. I got one question wrong because I don’t know the ratio of a yard to a foot (I’m not American).
I find it very odd that there are “what units are the most appropriate” questions in the advanced math test.
Class of 1981.
Don’t know why I took it - probably to get out of class.
I guess I scored 100% on it; 36 out of 36 or something? Every recruiter in Tennessee came calling, telling me they’d never seen that before, blah, blah, blah.
I only considered the Navy, since my dad had been a CPO. They promised me I could fly jets until they found out I was color blind. Lyin bastiges!
Scored 1590 something on my SAT.
I’ve successfully parlayed that into a mediocre life with a 16 year old truck with an oil leak.