# Do you keep your age a secret? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 13, 2005, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343 "2005-03-13T16:53:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Caprese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9a28c/32.png) [@Caprese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caprese)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/21 "2005-03-14T01:38:04Z")
I suppose are plenty of Boomers who do their damnedest to not _look_ (and perhaps act?) their age. But I think maybe it was the previous generation which had the habit of fibbing about it. I know my mom was that way. Like **Twickster** I turned 50 this year and I am brazening it out. As others have said, I haven’t lied about my age since I turned 21. Do not plan on changing this policy anytime soon. In terms of etiquette, I guess asking someone their age is indeed in the same category as asking weight, what you do for a living, etc. But I happily answer those questions as well. I don’t feel as uncomfortable with those questions as much as when someone bluntly asks me how much I paid for something. That one always seems rather crude. ---
**Author:** ![Merhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Merhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merhouse)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/22 "2005-03-14T03:11:16Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > I n2ver M5tion my age. n2t 5ver. I’m glad you don’t. I’ve spent way too much time variously deciding you’re 16 or 46 or 56 (or thereabouts), and I really have no clue why. Yes, I’m weird. No, I’m not stalking you. But I always do enjoy reading your posts 🙂 The Weird One[sup]TM[/sup] ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/23 "2005-03-14T03:13:19Z")
I’ve never lied about my age, but I don’t usually bring it up because people are always surprised. Online they tend to assume I’m older than I am, but in person people think I’m younger. The former doesn’t bother me (it means they think I’m wise, right? Or maybe just crotchety), but just in the past couple of years it’s started to make me feel old to be mistaken for an 18-year-old…or younger! It’s a good thing I don’t smoke or drink, because I’m sure I’d get carded every time. I was at a local Chinese New Year celebration and happened to mention my Chinese zodiac year. A Chinese gentleman present started insisting that I must be mistaken. He couldn’t believe I was really that old. Maybe I should find that flattering, but it made me feel that my real age must be horrifyingly old! ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/24 "2005-03-14T03:24:51Z")
No, I don’t lie about my age. I’m just now getting to the point where I’m starting to look a little closer to it, instead of much younger. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/25 "2005-03-14T03:33:50Z")
Besides the lying to buy booze previously mentioned, I’ve never worried about it. But I’ve encountered two situations in the past where lying about one’s age was in question. In the 1950s, my sister and I discovered that our parents had lopped of a decade in telling us their ages. It was explained to us (ages 5 & 7) when we confronted my mother that it was important to their careers. Yeah, a five year old got that. I mainly remember it as an early calibration of parental reliability. I later, ~30 for myself, dated a woman who was an aspiring opera singer. She was 29, and was starting to get the good contracts. But, as she explained to me, for the various producers she dealt with to continue to consider her seriously, she needed to be about 25 for the stage of her career that she was in (HGO TUTS for most of the era we dated). I never questioned that, as she explained her reasons and I knew naught about her professional life. So, I went along with the ruse. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/26 "2005-03-14T03:48:52Z")
Once on the tennis ladder I played this woman who kept going on at me about how, first, I looked too young to have children (!!) and second, when she saw them, I really looked too old to have children _that old_\* and then she asked how old I was and before I could answer she confessed that _she_ was forty. I had just turned forty myself, the week before (and in fact I was kind of sensitive about it). It seemed like it would be sort of an insult to say that, though, after what she’d been giving me, so I said I was thirty-five. I almost said “thirty-nine,” but nobody ever believes you’re really thirty-nine. * * * \*okay, I thought it was b.s. but still, I ate it up. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/27 "2005-03-14T04:20:40Z")
> [@Ringo](#): > > … she needed to be about 25 for the stage of her career that she was in (HGO TUTS for most of the era we dated). … Could you translate HGO TUTS, pls?? ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/28 "2005-03-14T04:54:42Z")
I should also note that if I have given my birthdate in a semi-public place (internet, bar, or even my office–I don’t mean to HR, I mean to the coworkers for purposes of some birthday list or another) I will not mention the year, and if I am forced to mention the year after having given the date I _will_ lie about it, one way or another. If I have mentioned the actual year I will not then reveal the specific date. If I am signing up for something (like free iPod songs) I will totally make up a birth date and will give the same date my computer does when it comes back after a minicrash (cutting my age approximately in half, but only approximately). This is in response to having done some intense research on identity theft four or five years ago. Sure, people can find out the actual birth date. I don’t have to make it easier. It is a piece of information. Any piece can be the important one to an identity thief. I lie about my cats’ age on the Internet, too. And their names. Do you have any idea how many people use their pets’ names as their passwords? ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/29 "2005-03-14T04:59:47Z")
Only from my Mom. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/30 "2005-03-14T05:00:20Z")
HGO TUTS = Houston Grand Opera Theatre Under The Stars ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/31 "2005-03-14T06:56:02Z")
I never lie about my age. Not much point, and I never lie anyway; it’s too much work. My memory is bad enough, how am I supposed to remember a bunch of fiction I made up for other peoples’ benefit? If someone asks something I think they don’t need to know, I say “I don’t know” or “I’m not answering that.” I do get asked how old I am a surprising amount, though. Usually I ask people how old they _think_ I am. Apparently I look 18-19. I’m 25 and kinda bummed I’m on the downhill slope towards 30, so people still thinking I’m 19 isn’t so bad. Often though, I’ll be speaking with someone in a public place like a restaurant or shopping or an airport, and after talking to me a little while the age question will come up. How I speak must not match up in terms of age, with my appearance. I frequently walk when running errands since I don’t have a car; a couple of weeks ago the ladies that work in the leasing office of my apartment building (who have seen me walking around) were really surprised to find out I live here myself, and I’m not just the kid of someone else who rents here. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![Shana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@Shana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shana)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/32 "2005-03-14T07:39:16Z")
My mother never lies about her age. She always states it rather nonchalantly (which is invariably followed by gasps of shock because she looks about 20 years younger than she is). I always admired that about her…I suppose I took my cue from her because I never have any desire to lie about my age. I’m 35 and people usually think I’m in my early 20s ( yay sunscreen!). If for some reason people stop thinking I’m younger than I am then so be it…Well, that would suck yes - but lying just seems silly. I have an aunt who always tells everyone that my dad is her older brother (he’s not). Her real age is hermetically sealed away in some underground vault where it will never see the light of day. (She must have threatened my cousins with a torturous death because they won’t tell)…But I find this behavior just makes her appear incredibly OLD. Sad that. ---
**Author:** ![carlotta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@carlotta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carlotta)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/33 "2005-03-14T12:17:40Z")
> [@jinwicked](#): > > the downhill slope towards 30 Jeez, people wonder why anyone is tempted to lie about their age ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/34 "2005-03-14T12:41:11Z")
> [@Ringo](#): > > HGO TUTS = Houston Grand Opera Theatre Under The Stars :smack: 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/96bed5/32.png) [@Cat\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Jones)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/35 "2005-03-14T12:51:22Z")
Only time I was tempted to lie was when I was 29, it was perhaps paranoia on my part but every time I told anyone my age that year I was sure I could read a \*‘Yeah, right you’re thirty but you don’t want to admit it’ \* look in their eyes so I was tempted to say 30 just to seem more honest and at ease with myself. For a long time people thought I looked younger than I was, sadly this ‘problem’ isn’t so common now ☹ ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/36 "2005-03-14T14:07:59Z")
> [@carlotta](#): > > Jeez, people wonder why anyone is tempted to lie about their age What? Should I be _happy_ about being further along the long march towards death? I don’t care about wrinkles or grey hair. I just don’t want to DIE. ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/37 "2005-03-14T14:57:58Z")
Nope, never lie, and I’ll tell anyone who asks. I’m 31. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/38 "2005-03-14T15:01:59Z")
> [@jinwicked](#): > > What? Should I be _happy_ about being further along the long march towards death? I don’t care about wrinkles or grey hair. I just don’t want to DIE. The way I look at it, the older I get, the further I am from the stupidity, pain, and cluelessness of my teens and twenties. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/39 "2005-03-14T16:04:44Z")
I don’t lie about my age, I freely acknowledge it in the real world and I usually get the “You don’t look \_\_\_\_\_!” response. However, I tend to avoid giving out my age online because I think people tend to dismiss people once they know their age. I have seen many instances of posters opinions being dismissed because another poster feels that they are too young or too old to have an opinion on the subject. I try not to base my opinions on other posters or their posts based on their age so I do not give out my age in the hope that others won’t do that to me. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343/40 "2005-03-14T16:15:40Z")
I really don’t care about getting older, and don’t mind when I’m asked my age. I’m 5 years away from 30 and I’m not concerned. I think Western culture must be the only culture I can think of that seems to be terrified of aging and will do anything to slow it down. Many cultures see older people as having wisdom and knowledge, so I wonder why so many people treat it as a bad thing? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-keep-your-age-a-secret/294343.md?page=3)