# Do you like attending ceremonies? If so, which ones? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 30, 2017, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427 "2017-07-30T05:19:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/21 "2017-07-31T08:39:35Z")
I have successfully avoided all funerals for 78 years, and Ive left explicit instructions to not be steered into my own, either. I even managed to be absent from those of my parents. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/22 "2017-07-31T09:06:00Z")
No. most of them are tedious and dreary. especially because so many of them are put on by/for people who act like they’re the first person in the world to actually do something. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/23 "2017-07-31T09:59:33Z")
Weddings, grad parties…I look ahead to those with dread. I had one wedding this year, no others on the horizon so far. One grad party next year, another the following. Yeah, I keep track. mmm ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/24 "2017-07-31T11:08:44Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > I have successfully avoided all funerals for 78 years, and Ive left explicit instructions to not be steered into my own, either. I even managed to be absent from those of my parents. Heh, nearly the same here. My dad hated funerals, avoiding them if at all possible. When he died I assumed there’d be none, but my sister grabbed the reigns and arranged a funeral. I assumed I _had_ to attend and was pretty pissed off. My mom specifically requested I not attend as it was a big enough affront to his memory just having a funeral. When my mom died, same thing. My sister (against everyone’s wishes) insisted on a funeral. My brother and I did not attend. ETA: my gf attended a wedding in Ohio last weekend. I remained behind to feed/care for dogs, horses, chickens, etc. Yay!!! ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/25 "2017-07-31T13:11:44Z")
Weddings surprisingly send a twinge of warmth through my icy heart. The receptions are often an opportunity to talk to people I don’t get to see very much, but they wear on me quickly. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/26 "2017-07-31T14:03:24Z")
Generally hate all ‘ceremonies’. However, had a blast at my own wedding. I think everyone did. At least it was fondly remembered by a number of people. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/27 "2017-07-31T14:29:09Z")
I like the ones with free booze. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/28 "2017-07-31T15:14:44Z")
For the purpose of this thread I think it makes sense to distinguish between the wedding **ceremony** and the wedding **reception**. I’d call the latter not a ceremony but a party with ceremonial aspects. “Do you like attending parties?” is a whole nother question. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/29 "2017-07-31T15:24:01Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > For the purpose of this thread I think it makes sense to distinguish between the wedding **ceremony** and the wedding **reception**. I’d call the latter not a ceremony but a party with ceremonial aspects. “Do you like attending parties?” is a whole nother question. Excellent distinction. I haven’t been to a _wedding ceremony_ in decades. I do go to many _wedding receptions_, however. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/30 "2017-07-31T17:49:32Z")
I don’t hate funerals. They’re mostly very meaningful and thought-provoking. ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2017, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/31 "2017-07-31T18:06:04Z")
I do not like ceremonies. I’m not a fan of large groups or getting dressed up and I’m not into making small talk or playing catch up with people I haven’t seen in years. The free booze is always a nice perk though 😊. ---
**Author:** ![C.Blackwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@C.Blackwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C.Blackwood)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/32 "2017-08-02T01:14:10Z")
No, I don’t particularly like going to ceremonies. Yes, I do go, on account of not wanting to offend the person or people who invited me. It may be that they just want money or a present; but on the other hand, I’m not a mind reader. (Plus, I’d rather think well of them than ill.) I think that if it’s important enough to somebody for them to mark whatever-it-is with a formal event, if I am able, the least I can do is recognize it too. In my opinion something like that isn’t about me, it’s about the main participants. Also, as **Mesquite-oh** said, usually the ceremony is followed by a party, and I am ALL over that! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/33 "2017-08-02T01:25:37Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I like the ones with free booze. This. And I make it known that that is the only reason I am there. Not to take part. Not to talk to anyone. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/34 "2017-08-02T01:44:16Z")
I love it when we get to hold a Black Belt ceremony for students who have earned their First Degree Black Belt. It’s a big deal and we try to make it a very memorable occasion. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/35 "2017-08-02T02:16:21Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I like the ones with free booze. Or at least cake. > [@Clothahump](#): > > I love it when we get to hold a Black Belt ceremony for students who have earned their First Degree Black Belt. It’s a big deal and we try to make it a very memorable occasion. Do you guys do cake? Or at least free booze? 😃 Anyway, I imagine when you’re the officiant (as it were) for the ceremony, all bets would be off _vis a vis_ your personal feelings about being at one primarily as a spectator. What’s your feeling about that kind? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/36 "2017-08-02T02:25:08Z")
> [@pullin](#): > > Has anyone involved actually enjoyed a wedding? These are the most nerve-wracking money-sinks that most families ever put on, and I don’t think any of the principals really enjoy it. There’s the occasional uncle who gets drunk on the free booze and has a blast, but the participants are stressed to the max. > > **To that end, my wife has offered our daughter the option of skipping the whole ceremony and pocketing the amount we would have spent (for their house down payment or whatever).** > > I wonder if there’s a study somewhere that maps wedding expense to marriage length. I’d bet a few large it’s an inverse correlation. > > To answer the OP: “No. I can’t think of any ceremonies I actually enjoyed.” How did she respond (or has the occasion not come up yet)? What would be the calculus for making such a decision? Depending on the putative guest list, skipping it could be forfeiting all kinds of wedding registry loot. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/37 "2017-08-02T02:26:28Z")
I like Good Friday church services, especially if they keep the lights low and generally make it like a funeral. In my Lutheran church they would extinguish candles one at a time then it’d be dark then the pastor would slam his book shut and we’d all exit in silence. There’s just something so good about feeling so bad and knowing that (ritualistically) everything is gonna turn around in a couple days. Obviously YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![purplehearingaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@purplehearingaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehearingaid)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/38 "2017-08-02T02:37:37Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > I don’t hate funerals. They’re mostly very meaningful and thought-provoking. My mom’s funeral wasn’t meaningful and thought provoking it was anger provoking ! One of my sisters told the rabbi about our dad being an abusive alcoholic and the damn rabbi brought this up at my mom’s funeral ! I was BULLSHIT when I heard the rabbi say this and called another rabbi to see what he thought of this and he wanted the rabbi name so he could call him and let him know he had no business saying this about my dead dad at my mom’s funeral b/c it was disrespectful . Mom’s whole funeral was so upsetting to me that when the rabbi pinned the black ribbon on me I didn’t thank him, I was too pissed off at him. He was some rabbi my older sister got for mom’s funeral and my sister didn’t know a thing about him . I don’t even want a funeral , I want to be cremated and have my ashes mixed with my last dog who was my faithful hearing dog and have my daughter bring our ashes along with my dog I have ashes to my hearing dog favorite park and have our ashes throw out to the river . I don’t want any damn rabbi after my mom’s funeral ! I don’t to waste land by being buried and I sure don’t to blow money on a damn funeral ! ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/39 "2017-08-02T02:48:18Z")
Welp, good thing **Dung Beetle** didn’t go to your mom’s funeral then. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2017, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427/40 "2017-08-02T02:54:19Z")
My feelings toward ceremonies of any kind starts with complete boredom and goes down from there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-like-attending-ceremonies-if-so-which-ones/792427.md?page=3)