# Do you not believe in Bi-sexuals? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 24, 2001, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293 "2001-03-24T07:05:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/1 "2001-03-24T07:05:19Z")
I have often heard that there is really no such thing as a true bisexual, either it is a phase or the person is really homosexual but not ready to face up to it? I don’t buy it, do you? ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 9:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/2 "2001-03-24T09:55:18Z")
Hell, _I’m_ bisexual. This is how I know… There have been women who I’ve been very attracted to. There have been men who I’ve been very attracted to. I’m not attracted to all women. I’m not attracted to all men. Tell me, how does that make me “not bisexual”? I am attracted to members of both sexes. “Both”=bi, “sexes”=sexual. Bisexual. You might as well say that there’s no such thing as Christianity… “They’re just Jews going through a phase”. ---
**Author:** ![Erroneous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/71c47a/32.png) [@Erroneous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erroneous)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/3 "2001-03-24T10:11:30Z")
Every time someone says they don’t believe in bisexuals, a bisexual dies somewhere. The only way to bring them back is by clapping your hands. _claps frantically_ I _DO_ believe in bisexuals! I DO! ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/4 "2001-03-24T10:29:23Z")
Bless you, Erroneous! You’ve just revived my currently-preferred-gender lover, Bruce! Well… I guess I’ll have to put off switching preferred-gender for a while… that’s okay, Tammy can wait. ---
**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/5 "2001-03-24T15:04:33Z")
While its true there are a lot of people who may fit into those categories, many do not. I am bi and after many years, I doubt it’s a phase. I am attracted to women in the same way I am to men. I enjoy sex with both, equally. Sometimes I actually get cravings for women. I will never not be attracted to women just as I will never not like men. ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/6 "2001-03-24T15:51:06Z")
I’ve known I was bi since before it was “cool” to be bi (someone figure THAT crap out for me…sexual preference as a trend? WTF?), and before I had finished going through puberty…heck, before I knew there was a word for it. An acquaintance of mine told me he didn’t believe in bisexuals. I told him, “Well, I’m still here…” Stunningly enough, his lack of belief in me didn’t make me vanish. I guess real life isn’t like the fairy tales after all. **Erroneous** , yer killin’ me over here. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/7 "2001-03-24T15:55:08Z")
A good friend of mine and I got into this very discussion the other day (I like to think of myself as straight, but slightly bent, as I readily admit to being attracted to some men as well). My friend, who is lesbian, said that she didn’t believe that anyone was truly bisexual - only opportunistic. ---
**Author:** ![Commander\_Fortune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Commander\_Fortune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commander_Fortune)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/8 "2001-03-24T16:23:11Z")
How do you suppose your friend would respond to the attitude. “I don’t believe in Lesbianism, only women who haven’t been screwed right…” What a crock. ---
**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/9 "2001-03-24T16:24:22Z")
I’m “opportunistic”? I take advantage of opportunities or situations with little regard for principles or consequences? Damn, and here I thought all along that my desires were actual mental and physical desires. Many people, given certain situations, will “jump the fence” so to speak. I wouldn’t classify them as bi either. Nor do I consider “being bi” as having done it occasionally, or doing it for someone else’s pleasure (so someone can watch). I spend a lot of time in personal ads, and two phrases I see a lot, which I really don’t like at all, are “Can be bi with the right person” and “passively bi”. Oh, horse cookies. THAT is opportunistic, or just “open to alternatives”, not bi in any sense. It’s not a bad thing, and the only reason I don’t like the phrases is that by putting the word “Bi” in them, it makes the people who actually are bi, seem like they are “opportunistic” also. When I go out with or without hubby, and see a girl I’m attracted to, many times I will try and seduce her if I get the feeling that she will not be offended by it and I think I have a shot. I’m not taking advantage of an opportunity, but trying to create an opportunity, the same way a straight guy will try and get a girl to come home with them, for the same reasons. If that is not a true feeling that I’m having, then I have to say that anyone who has ever had sex is simply an opportunist that isn’t acting on their desires and needs, and we are all a bunch of phonies. Just my nickel 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Commander\_Fortune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Commander\_Fortune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commander_Fortune)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/10 "2001-03-24T16:26:20Z")
To be clear, plnnr, that shouldn’t be contrued as an attack on your friend personally. I find it to be a attitude particularly common and tiring, ESPESCIALLY from another sexual minority. ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/11 "2001-03-24T16:44:54Z")
I think quite a bit of it stems from the fact that a lot of people who are homosexual date members of the opposite sex for a time and identify as bisexual for awhile. I did. For some people, calling themselves bisexual is transitory. But I believe! \ ---
**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/12 "2001-03-24T18:39:43Z")
Oh, I believe in 'em… I just won’t date 'em anymore. I’ve never met a bi guy who didn’t, when the opportunity presented itself, choose a long-term relationship with a woman, rather than a man. I can’t say that I blame them; in this society it’s a lot easier to maintain a straight relationship. But I’ll stick to gay folks, thanks. Not that I’m dating much of anyone lately… ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/13 "2001-03-24T19:31:53Z")
I believe I believe I believe! What pisses me off is my gay roommate who doesn’t believe I’m bisexual because I haven’t had sex yet. ::sound of one hand clapping:: ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/14 "2001-03-24T19:39:17Z")
> [@](#): > > ::sound of one hand clapping:: \*\* Thats what the kids are calling it these days? No more polishing the bishop? \ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2001, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/15 "2001-03-24T22:26:48Z")
If anything, I don’t believe in Monosexuals. Not really, but bisexuals are definitely a sexual possivility. Limiting people to one sex to which they can be attracted has no basis in reality, it’s just an attempt by humans to make the world make more sense by needless categorization. Me, I’m bisexual, but not a balanced bisexual. I’m only “romantically” attracted to women, but sexually attracted to both sexes. ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2001, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/16 "2001-03-25T04:04:34Z")
Far from not believing they exist, I believe that everyone is bisexual, or at the very least has bisexual tendencies and/or thoughts. I know I am. ---
**Author:** ![Torgo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@Torgo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Torgo)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2001, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/17 "2001-03-25T04:13:53Z")
For me a monosexual is one who is attracted to human beings. Only a true bisexual can bravely assert his or her desire for a mighty redwood or slab of igneous rock. Even more courageous are those who acknowledge their aching for non-carbon based entities. Who among us will ever admit to fantasizing about a threesome with a sound wave and a black hole? ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2001, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/18 "2001-03-25T04:21:06Z")
Just to clarify: When I said “monosexual,” I was making a contrast with “bisexual.” Monosexual means strictly heterosexual or homosexual, which I am skeptical if it truly happens. ---
**Author:** ![dublos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f08c70/32.png) [@dublos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dublos)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2001, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/19 "2001-03-25T05:04:18Z")
I think I still prefer the concept that sexuality is a continuous spectrum with heterosexuals on one end, homosexuals on the other, and a full variety of flavors of bisexuality in between. I consider myself to be heterosexual that’s open to the possibility of bi, basically because I’ve never met a male I’m sexually/romantically attracted to though I feel open to the possibility. So I don’t consider myself to be all the way to the heterosexual end of the spectrum, but I’m not all that far off it. I’m also not sure whether our sexuality is set in stone, and we just spend a lifetime discovering it, or whether it is a flexible part of us that can change over time. Now asexuality I have some difficulty, but I believe in that too. Or at least I don’t try and correct someone who believes that is there true sexual nature. Which is a long winded journey to respond to the OP, which can be summarized as “nope, I don’t believe that either, there is definitely such a thing as a bisexual”. I’ve also discovered in my journey so far that women who are bisexual are frequently very good lovers because they are more in touch with their sexuality than many heterosexual women are. > [@](#): > > Every time someone says they don’t believe in bisexuals, a bisexual dies somewhere. The only way to bring them back is by clapping your hands. :: joins in clapping :: ---
**Author:** ![fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7ba0ec/32.png) [@fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fish_in_the_sky)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2001, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293/20 "2001-03-25T05:54:54Z")
\*Originally posted by Torgo \* > [@](#): > > \*\*desire for a mighty redwood \*\* > [@](#): > > \*\* > fantasizing about […] a black hole? > \*\* Is that what the kids are calling 'em these days? 😉 Oh, and count me in as another one who believes that sexuality is fluid and that everyone is some degree of bisexual. As for me, right now I’m going through an all-girl phase–boys are icky and gross. Except, of course, for that one guy in my art class. Mmmmm… :: passionately claps for bisexuals everywhere :: [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-not-believe-in-bi-sexuals/59293.md?page=2)