# Do you prefer to visit or be visited?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [March 3, 2011, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378 "2011-03-03T17:23:34Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 8\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![chizzuk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@chizzuk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chizzuk)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2011, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/21 "2011-03-03T23:52:45Z")

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> [@Asimovian](#):
>
> I gave a very slight edge to visiting. I can get tired of company after a while, but I hate kicking people out of my home. I find it far easier to say that I’m heading out when I’m at someone else’s place.

Exactly this. I like hanging out with friends but I need to have an escape for when I inevitably get tired of being social, and it’s easier to make excuses and leave someone’s house than nicely kick them out of yours.

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**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/22 "2011-03-04T00:10:43Z")

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I like to be in control of what we do. The folks I visit don’t really do much true hosting and leave their visits up to their own ends. I’d prefer to have cool things planned to do, interesting restaurants to go to, etc. And in case I’m still not conveying what I mean very well, I want people to visit me rather than I visit them. That way no one has to entertain me, but I like doing it for them.

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**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/23 "2011-03-04T00:22:20Z")

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Many people who visit others do know know when to leave. I only want people in my house who know when the visit is over or should be.

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**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/24 "2011-03-04T00:49:08Z")

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When I had a nice big house I loved entertaining but now my bedroom is the living room and there’s no sofa or even a table in the kitchen. It’s embarrassing for people to come here so I just go to other people’s homes.

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**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/25 "2011-03-04T00:56:30Z")

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I like visiting and being visited, but I feel bad about imposing on other people (having to clean, feeling like they need to provide entertainment/food/drinks). Yet I also feel bad about spending lots of my own money on gas (and time on the road travelling)!

So in our group of friends, we have a weekly ‘group date’ and we rotate between houses to keep it balanced. It seems to have worked well for the two years we’ve been doing it. Now if only gas prices will stay low enough that we can continue the tradition!

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**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/26 "2011-03-04T01:00:56Z")

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I hate being the host. I am the guest whenever possible.

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**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/27 "2011-03-04T01:21:20Z")

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I love to cook and I’m good at it, plus my house is almost always clean anyway, so I picked be the host.  
Then there is the drinking and driving thing, though I hardly drink anymore. It’s just not worth the calories or the hangover.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [March 4, 2011, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-prefer-to-visit-or-be-visited/573378/28 "2011-03-04T01:56:34Z")

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Like most things in life, I like variety–either way works fine for me. I love hosting, and I love visiting friends. Gun to head, I probably slightly prefer hosting to visiting.

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