# Do you think being tied up during sex is common, or movie/TV shorthand? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 7, 2001, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223 "2001-09-07T13:40:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/21 "2001-09-07T16:12:44Z")
**Arden and Jarbaby** I found this great tape like stuff. It does not stick to hair so it goes on quickly like tape and HOLDS but when you want it off it comes off easy. What do you _think_ about that? ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/22 "2001-09-07T16:31:48Z")
Tape? Hmm… I’ve always preferred leather cuffes but I’m willing to give your discovery a try. What’s it called? **Superdude** : Feh. Too far. I have Orange Peel this weekened. OSU’s Homecoming. Blue’s Traveler and freeflowing alcohol. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/23 "2001-09-07T16:35:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arden Ranger \* > \*\* > **Superdude** : I have Orange Peel this weekened. OSU’s Homecoming. Blue’s Traveler and freeflowing alcohol. 😃 \*\* Another time, then. ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/24 "2001-09-07T17:18:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*Arden Ranger \*\* > Feh. Too far…&…OSU’s Homecoming. See, this is where I would say “13 1/2 hours, I’ll be there in 9.” Also, it’s great to see another Ohio State Buckeye fan. 😉 _ **Go Bucks!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/25 "2001-09-07T17:22:08Z")
Ohio State has a football team? 😛 You’d have to tie me up to make me watch televised football. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/26 "2001-09-07T17:32:52Z")
Hey **Zebra** – Are you talking about the sports-tape stuff? Just be careful because it IS possible to tape too tightly and restrict circulation. BTW, if you buy the tape from a horse supply store ([www.statelinetack.com](http://www.statelinetack.com)) its called 3M Vetrap, comes in a variety of cheerful colors, and costs as little as $1.50/roll. ---
**Author:** ![Heloise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e36b37/32.png) [@Heloise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heloise)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/27 "2001-09-07T17:47:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by as if \* > \*\*_I can’t imagine it working at all._ When you lose control, you can’t help with the action, and the odds of you getting off drop to zero. > \*\* That’s the problem. You picture it as some disgusting, made-up-by-tv thing and have given up on it before you even try it. For me, that’s like turning my nose up at chocolate because I don’t like the way it looks without even tasting it! ---
**Author:** ![that\_darn\_cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/59ef9b/32.png) [@that\_darn\_cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/that_darn_cat)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/28 "2001-09-07T17:48:10Z")
Ya know, sometimes easy and convinient isn’t as much fun. I sometimes use friction tape on **moi** and she really loves it. It pretty much only sticks to itself, but it tends to leave a black, sticky residue. But it somehow seems rougher than handuffs or scarves, and sometimes, that’s what we want. Just my $.02. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/29 "2001-09-07T17:48:51Z")
“Bring out The Gimp.” “The Gimp’s sleeping.” “Well, I guess you’ll just have to wake him up!” If you have a Pleasure Chest in your area, you can get fleece-lined cuffs with Velcro quick-release straps that are safe, yet effective. For DC folk, you can pick up mouth gags, straps, and other BDSM accoutrements at the Leather Rack on Connecticut Ave. NW in Dupont Circle. “If you want to kiss the sky, you better learn how to kneel, boy!” ---
**Author:** ![DougC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/30 "2001-09-07T17:59:06Z")
- - - I’ve seen that sex tape stuff! It’s not tape, it’s kind of like the same plastic that window film stickers are made out of: it has no adhesive, but it clings to itself when pulled a bit tight like food wrap, and it does stretch. It’s not real strong though. And a girl I know showed it to me, but not in that way. -Which in her case, I wouldn’t have complained, but that just ain’t the way it is. ~ - I have found that so many women like to be held firm when in the act, that I tend to do it anyway as a matter of standard procedure. I haven’t had any rape charges yet but I’m still single, so who knows? Preferred method seems to be (with her on her back) reach under her shoulders and hold her wrists firm, while holding an earlobe in my teeth. Strictly no earrings though, I nearly choked to death once on one that came out. -But aside from that, I was Mr Smooth… - MC ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/31 "2001-09-07T18:03:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zebra \* > \*\*Well everybody needs a little restraint. > \*\* I’m pasting this on my wall. mmm…submission and rope. _sigh_ It may not be common, but its not unusual. (Actually being tied up is pretty darn fun, with the right person.) and Superdude, major bonus points. Major. That marriage offer is looking better and better. ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/32 "2001-09-07T18:22:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Medea’s Child \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Zebra \* > > \*\*Well everybody needs a little restraint. > > \*\* > > I’m pasting this on my wall. > > mmm…submission and rope. _sigh_ > > \ > and Superdude, major bonus points. Major. That marriage offer is looking better and better. \*\* Hey, can I be a bridesmaid? I _definately_ want to part of this wedding party. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/33 "2001-09-07T18:25:55Z")
**BunnyGirl** –it’s alright with me if it’s alright with **Medea’s Child**. **Medea’s Child** –in the immortal words of Eric Cartman, “kickass.” ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/34 "2001-09-07T18:31:14Z")
I would just like to add one thought. **Hospital restraints.** Guaranteed not to bruise. And I have to agree…_rowr_. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/35 "2001-09-07T18:33:46Z")
Oh. My. God. I like to be tied up. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/36 "2001-09-07T18:38:37Z")
Alas, I have to drive about 80 miles to get to a Pleasure Chest or a similiar store. Closest thing I have is the Farm Supply. 🙂 But they do have a selection of leather straps, buckles, riding crops, whips, dog collars, probably that Vet tape stuff… Damn. Need to go shopping again, I htink. ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/37 "2001-09-07T18:43:43Z")
Well, in answer to the OP: “Do you think being tied up during sex is common, or movie/TV shorthand?” Not “common” like “kissing,” but not “uncommon” like “bukkake.” “I’ve personally never met anyone who even brought up the subject during sex discussions.” I’ve rarely met ANYONE who, when the talk turns to sex, doesn’t mention being tied up or typing up…even if they’re lame lying poseur bastards who are only trying to **appear** edgy. “Would I want it? No, of course not.” Your call…although it would seem from the responses so far that your “of course not” is not necessarily an “of course.” 😃 “I can’t imagine it working at all. When you lose control, you can’t help with the action, and the odds of you getting off drop to zero.” I…and many others…do not rely on my own limbs and digits to achieve orgasm. “But I think movies and TV like to use it just to show that rough sex happened without a lot of dialog or screen time. If you put Beaver Cleaver’s dad in his twin bed in his pyjamas uner the covers with the light on, and his hands were tied with ribbons to the bedstead- Well, you’d still think he had a hot sex life.” Well, I’d definitely think June was one hell of a hot little ticket. I know what you’re saying about movies and TV using implied bondage to also imply “hot sex,” but it’s a fact that you’re not going to see a 9" strap-on lying on the coffee table on “Friends” any time soon. And since apparently more people than I would have imagined don’t know that there are a hell of a lot of different levels of bondage play, the viewing audience can imagine wrist restraits and a feather duster OR mask, ball-gag, spreaders, a couple of sawhorses, marine line and a 10-foot bullwhip…depending on how offended they want to be. 😃 Not that I’d know about any of this stuff, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/38 "2001-09-07T19:50:36Z")
So many other questions from folks with low post counts get written off as trolls but I think an awful lot of Dopers like this topic… It’s been my observation that far more people like being tied up than doing the tying. No complaint there as it improves my odds. Lots of ways BDSM can take place and very little of it is like the gimp in _Pulp Fiction_. IMO consensual power exchange is a good way to look at it. ---
**Author:** ![Edwardina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Edwardina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edwardina)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/39 "2001-09-07T20:01:44Z")
It has rarely **not** come up. I have tied up all my boyfriends at least once, clear back to before I was actually sexually active. I have never been tied up, though, because no one has ever offered to return the favor. (Up until just recently it seemed that I always attracted submissive types). My current SO said he was going to, once, but he never did. Imagine my disappointment! I thought for once I was going to get to see how the other half lives . . . ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223/40 "2001-09-07T20:20:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Edwardina \* > **It has rarely notI have never been tied up, though, because no one has ever offered to return the favor.** Edwardina, how you doin’? 😃 One of the first thing I learned from my D&S mentors was that not everyone is cut out to dom. “I can’t do those depraved things to my S/O, I _love_ him/her!” IMO you should **only** do those things with someone you do truly care for. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-being-tied-up-during-sex-is-common-or-movie-tv-shorthand/80223.md?page=3)