# Do You Think Rich People Would Send Me A Million Dollars If I wrote Them This?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [March 29, 2001, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977 "2001-03-29T15:15:42Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 14\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/21 "2001-03-30T15:02:34Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by waxteeth \*
> 
> You will need to get your letter to the subject on the day they get diagnosed with a rapidly progressing terminal illness. The tricky part is that they also need to have just had a nasty falling out with all likely airs, and are distraught about what to do with the estate.
> 
> When all of these things happen with “synergistic perfected timing” you will not only get the million but you will get it many times over.

AH my dear waxteeth…your plan would be flawless except for one little…well…flaw.

THESE PEOPLE DON’T READ THEIR OWN MAIL. 🙂

When I had to filter through the ‘strange petition’ mail for my boss, if I found something that was even REMOTELY interesting, it had to go to the assistant above ME, through HER filtering process and THEN to THE WIFE…who filtered through it as well.

It won’t work Bill. Stick with dealing mexican fat burners…they’re all the rage at the raves these days.

jarbaby

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**Author:** ![Wildest\_Bill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Wildest\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wildest_Bill)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/22 "2001-03-30T15:07:22Z")

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Now I’m a mexican fat burner dealer? Sheesh. What’s next am I going to be the ring leader of Columbian Drug Cartel?

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**Author:** ![headshok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@headshok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/headshok)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/23 "2001-03-30T15:39:01Z")

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Hey, at least then you wouldn’t have to ask anyone for money.🙂

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**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/24 "2001-03-30T15:46:19Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Piell \*  
> \*\*Someday I will write a letter to a billionare, and it will go like this:  
> …  
> Can I have a nickel? \*\*

And when I am a billionaire, I will spend $2000 fly a courier to you with my response.

“no.”  
😃

–sublight.

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**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/25 "2001-03-30T15:50:21Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Sublight \*  
> … spend $2000 fly a courier…

And when I’m a billionaire, I will hire someone to proofread my posts. :rolleyes:

–sublight.

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**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/26 "2001-03-30T16:02:10Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Sublight \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by Sublight \*  
> > … spend $2000 fly a courier…
> 
> And when I’m a billionaire, I will hire someone to proofread my posts. :rolleyes:
> 
> –sublight.

I’ll do it…  
FOR A MILLION DOLLARS… 🙂

jarbaby

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**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/27 "2001-03-30T16:44:49Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> There is no documented proof of liver damage with injectable steroid only the 17aa orals. And that was over extended use inotherword the user abused the drug. And if you abuse anything, it will usually hurt you. If I were to do roids, I would do them(injectables) only in short intervals and take milk thistle to help with the liver. In the research I have done I have not seen any real documented proof that roids are as bad as the media and the govt would have you believe. Remember they are illegal because of sports matter of fact the AMA did not think they should be illegal.

And just how hard have you looked for this documented proof? The fact that steroids are helpful for people with real hormone deficiencies or asthma is not a comment on their use in sports. Glad I wasn’t wating my time discussing this…

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**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\
**Post date:** [March 30, 2001, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/28 "2001-03-30T16:47:44Z")

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…er…wasting my time, here.

[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=58223](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=58223)

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**Author:** ![Bill\_H](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Bill\_H](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_H)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2001, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/29 "2001-04-07T00:17:58Z")

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Though I don’t agree with **waxteeth** ’s tone, the message is right on target. I’m in the circles of some pretty wealthy people and they are 100% believers in hard work. Not coincidently, they are hard workers themselves. Most of them also believe in helping those that are in poor circumstances, but none of them (not .0001%: 0%) have any interest in giving someone something so they can have a party. None of them have any interest in giving someone something when the recipient has no interest in working for it himself.

I can tell you with great certitude that your letter will do the exact opposite of what it is intended: it will tell someone who despises laziness that you are lazy.

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**Author:** ![waxteeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@waxteeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waxteeth)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2001, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/30 "2001-04-07T00:46:24Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Bill H. \*  
> \*\*Though I don’t agree with **waxteeth** ’s tone, the message is right on target. \*\*

🆒 That’s my first smiley face in a non-test post I think it’s appropriate.

Hey jarbabyj SHHHHH! You have located one of the major flaws in my plan.

Don’t blow it for me and I’ll cut you in on my take from Wildest Bill.

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**Author:** ![Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/df788c/32.png) [@Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ben)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2001, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/31 "2001-04-07T07:51:28Z")

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You know, this whole liberal vs. conservative thing is becoming clear to me:

Bad liberal ethics: the government takes money from rich people and divides it up among people like myself, so we can work on curing cancer.

Good conservative ethics: rich people decide to give a million dollars to people like Wildest Bill, so they can work on their wakeboarding.

(g,d,+r)

-Ben

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**Author:** ![Silly\_Rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Silly\_Rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silly_Rabbit)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2001, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/32 "2001-04-07T18:11:28Z")

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**Wildest Bill** , just so ya know… I took your OP in the spirit for which it was intended.

🙂

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**Author:** ![Evnglion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f04885/32.png) [@Evnglion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evnglion)\
**Post date:** [April 7, 2001, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/33 "2001-04-07T20:17:51Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wildest Bill \*  
> **I’m a mexican fat burner dealer**

What is that anyway?..you mean stuff like Metabolife 356 or whatever it’s called?

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**Author:** ![flyboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/4da419/32.png) [@flyboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flyboy)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2001, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-rich-people-would-send-me-a-million-dollars-if-i-wrote-them-this/59977/34 "2001-04-08T14:58:20Z")

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I’ve avoided this thread for days because I found the title offensive, even though I knew whatever it was about had to be some sort of joke. I just now succumbed out of boredom and am not so sure, **Silly Rabbit** , that he’s joking at all. The OP I could buy as a joke if **WB** at some point acknowledged it; his subsequent posts now have me believing he’s entirely serious. Please correct me if I’m wrong, **WB** ; otherwise, I’ll never pay any attention to any posts you make in the future. Your attitude (if you’re not joking) totally disgusts me.

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