# Do you think the story about the gay waiter receiving the nasty note is a hoax? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 25, 2013, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225 "2013-10-25T17:15:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Depakote\_Chopra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/919ad9/32.png) [@Depakote\_Chopra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Depakote_Chopra)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2013, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/21 "2013-10-26T09:01:36Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > So how did this couple know the waiter was gay? I know, right ? How do you know someone is gay ? Don’t worry, they’ll fucking tell you. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2013, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/22 "2013-10-26T09:03:35Z")
Who says they “knew”? Maybe they assumed based on cultural stereotypes and just happened to get it right. If these people exist, if they’re willing to write something like this, I’m sure they’re willing to make assumptions based on bigoted stereotypes. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2013, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/23 "2013-10-26T09:23:37Z")
Basically you can’t twerk your male customers and then expect a tip. Especially if you are male. ---
**Author:** ![Zago](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecccb3/32.png) [@Zago](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zago)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/24 "2013-10-27T01:05:22Z")
I’m inclined to think this is a facebook hoax, however - I live in downtown Salem MA where Halloween is celebrated every day and is in full throttle mode during the month of October. We have these Bible thumping types here in droves in October and just last night several of them were outside the historic Hawthorne Hotel. It wouldn’t surprise me at all to run into a couple of them in the tavern restaurant (of course they wouldn’t be imbibing). ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/25 "2013-10-27T08:35:08Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > A substantial percentage of which, I’m pretty sure, are also untrue. On notalwaysright, though, some dashing stranger would have stepped in and publicly shamed the homophobic customers, “and then the whole restaurant applauded”, and the story would end with the news that the waiter and his rescuer have been dating for six months and “we’re getting married next year!”. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/26 "2013-10-27T15:48:03Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > So how did this couple know the waiter was gay? He probably said he could eat them under the table. ---
**Author:** ![JKilez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e5b9ba/32.png) [@JKilez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKilez)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/27 "2013-10-27T16:23:07Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > I can’t really declare an opinion as to whether this story is true or false. I believe it’s possible that somebody would be a big enough dick to write such a note and I believe it’s possible that somebody would be a big enough dick to fake such a note. So you are saying that you could go either way? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/28 "2013-10-27T16:41:45Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > I can’t really declare an opinion as to whether this story is true or false. I believe it’s possible that somebody would be a big enough dick to write such a note and I believe it’s possible that somebody would be a big enough dick to fake such a note. I agree. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/29 "2013-10-27T18:42:03Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > Who says they “knew”? Maybe they assumed based on cultural stereotypes and just happened to get it right. > > If these people exist, if they’re willing to write something like this, I’m sure they’re willing to make assumptions based on bigoted stereotypes. Oh come on. Everyone assumes someone is gay sometimes and there’s nothing wrong with that. It would be ridiculous to assume you can always tell, but it is just as ridiculous to say you never can. Of course, if you’re not a bigot, it wouldn’t matter if you were wrong anyway. As for the note, I wouldn’t be at all surprised either way. One thing they did get right is the way they put GOD in all caps, which religious nuts always do, and probably most regular people haven’t ever noticed that and therefore wouldn’t copy it, but I notice because it just happens to irritate me. ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2013, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225/30 "2013-10-27T23:54:27Z")
I’m not going to weigh in on whether this is true, but two of the pieces of evidence offered that it is not don’t cut it for me: “people aren’t that awful” and “we see this every week.” People at their worst are pretty fucking awful, and I only see these stories every few months. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-think-the-story-about-the-gay-waiter-receiving-the-nasty-note-is-a-hoax/672225.md?page=1)