# Do you use the toilet in front of your partner? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 10, 2010, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729 "2010-10-10T23:15:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Miss\_Woodhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@Miss\_Woodhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Woodhouse)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2010, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/41 "2010-10-11T21:09:55Z")
No. It’s a line we drew at the very beginning of our marriage. Nope. No. Even after my C-sections he would help me to the bathroom and then leave so I could have my privacy. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2010, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/42 "2010-10-11T21:12:54Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > Wow, I’m surprised at how many people have issues with this. We won’t follow one another in there or anything but if I’m brushing my teeth and he has to go or if he is in the shower and I have to go or whatever it isn’t an issue at all. This is a man who has held my hair back for me while I barfed. I’ve cleaned his back hair out of the shower drain. We occasionally have sex while I’m on my period. Seriously, we’ve done _way_ grosser things than being in the same room together while one of us makes. > [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > After you see a woman give birth, there isn’t any mystery left. These things are very much how my thinking on the subject goes. For years, when we were together but not ready for kids, I used the birth control sponge. A couple of times, it got too far inside me, and I was unable to retrieve it myself, and he had to go, uh, ‘spelunking’ for it! And, he _has_ held my hair out of my face while I barfed. And he’s watched all three of our kids being delivered by C-section. The man has seen my insides, for God’s sake. I can’t imagine him getting squeamish about me peeing while he’s in the shower! ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2010, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/43 "2010-10-11T21:19:01Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > Wow, I’m surprised at how many people have issues with this… See, now I’m surprised that my “no, of course not” option isn’t 99%. Actually it’s been hovering around 50% since I put this up. When I was a kid we had one bathroom for four people and we always closed and locked the door. I suppose it’s different with parents and children than it is with just partners (although some of you have mentioned your children), but I can’t imagine my parents had different rules when we were out of the house. Maybe we’re just kind of formal…? ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2010, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/44 "2010-10-11T22:23:14Z")
Pee, maybe, but that’s it. And, I have seen babies born. I have not observed a woman pinching a loaf. I really don’t care to. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![Fionn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fionn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fionn)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/45 "2010-10-12T03:10:59Z")
My SO and I have been together for six years, and I would only use the toilet in front of her in the instance of a dire medical emergency. We always say that someone we’ll be so old we won’t have a choice, so we’re enjoying our privacy now. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/46 "2010-10-12T03:51:08Z")
I prefer not to have an audience, but occasionally my wife will come in for something. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/47 "2010-10-12T03:54:17Z")
> [@Bloody\_L](#): > > Absolutely not. And it really, really bothers me. My boyfriend teases me all the time about how it makes me uncomfortable. His bathroom door doesnt have a lock so when he’s being a total jerk (he thinks its hilarious) he’ll open the door while I’m in there just to freak me out. It really upsets me and one night I couldn’t use the restroom for 3 hours because everytime I tried he’d burst open the door. I was so mad that when he got bored and stopped, I still didn’t trust him and was too worried to go so I held it in till he went to sleep. > > I almost broke up with him the next day. “I’m going to a hotel now. Call me when you grow up.” ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/48 "2010-10-12T04:11:10Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > Our bathroom is too small for that sort of thing. She closes the door all the way. I leave it ajar for the cat to come in - he likes me to turn the faucet on to a trickle. Sometimes he drinks, sometimes he stares at it like a half-wit. > > Joe My cat loves to come in the bathroom while I’m taking a dump and rub on my legs. It’s possible he likes the smell. ---
**Author:** ![FrancisCastle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b4bc9f/32.png) [@FrancisCastle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FrancisCastle)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/49 "2010-10-12T04:43:13Z")
#1 is fine, #2 is not. My boyfriend freaks out if a fart sneaks out while I’m peeing. It’s not a huge deal to me, but it is to him. ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_in\_second\_hand\_clothing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9d8465/32.png) [@wolf\_in\_second\_hand\_clothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_in_second_hand_clothing)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/50 "2010-10-12T05:19:25Z")
My ex practically _made_ me pee in front of her to prove that I was comfortable in our relationship (she did it in front of me all the time). She never pooped in front of me, but once she tried to come in and see how I looked when I was pooping. I locked her out. ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/51 "2010-10-12T12:19:08Z")
I will pee with no problem, but I can’t poop with someone standing right there. I usually tell him “Get out, hon I have to take a crap”. I can’t even poop in a public bathroom if someone else is in there. ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/52 "2010-10-12T13:05:23Z")
#1 - Yup. It’s kinda hot, actually. #2 - Nope. I’m the guy who will unabashedly walk through the office with the newspaper, but I like my privacy. She tries to make me leave the house when it’s her turn, so that I don’t smell the rainbows and butterflies that apparently come out. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/53 "2010-10-12T13:09:28Z")
I wouldn’t have a problem if she used it in front of me, but she never would. I would have no problem using it in front of her, but it skeeves her out. So there you go (didn’t vote because nothing quite fit). ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/54 "2010-10-12T13:15:51Z")
> [@black\_rabbit](#): > > …#2 - Nope. I’m the guy who will unabashedly walk through the office with the newspaper, but I like my privacy… Huh?? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/55 "2010-10-12T13:36:37Z")
Like others, I will do almost everything in front of him, except poo. He has held my hair back while I barfed, but I don’t barf every day, do I? And once when the toilet backed up he cleaned it (I helped, as much as I could, but I was trying not to throw up). That doesn’t mean I should just throw up my hands and go “oh well”. So the door is still firmly shut, both for him and for me. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/56 "2010-10-12T14:13:39Z")
No. We even have different bathrooms, yay for our awesome house. We only fart in each others’ presence at night, when we can both pretend we’re asleep. I’m interested in finding out how the having-a-baby thing is going to go. I think he’s not even sure he wants to be in the room. The more I think about it, the more I’d rather not be in the room, either. Until, you know, there’s a baby to see and make everything worth it. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/57 "2010-10-12T14:42:03Z")
I don’t think any of our bathroom doors are ever closed. In fact, if one of us is peeing, the other might join in (assuming we’re both standing). ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/58 "2010-10-12T15:09:52Z")
> [@a35362](#): > > > [@black\_rabbit](#): > > > > …#2 - Nope. I’m the guy who will unabashedly walk through the office with the newspaper, but I like my privacy… > > Huh?? I don’t care if anybody knows that I’m on my way to take a crap, but I prefer to keep the actual experience to myself. There are a surprising number of people who like to pretend that they never hang the monkey tail. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/59 "2010-10-12T17:17:26Z")
Well, you see it’s like this… At my place, privacy is no problem, I have 2 bathrooms with working doors. At my girlfreinds place, there is a problem She lives in a small cabin. The bathroom has a pocket door that is a pain in the ass to open and close. Because of where it’s located, the bathroom can be used in some privacy with the door open. We have on a couple occasions caught each other using the bathroom. It doesn’t bother her at all, #1 or #2. I have no problem with #2 but it’s a guaranteed way for me to freeze up if I am going #1. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2010, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729/60 "2010-10-12T18:41:56Z")
Ugh, no. Neither of us has ever done #1 _or_ #2 in front of the other. We both like our privacy, and I’m sure he’d be as mortified as I am at the thought of doing that in front of each other. Our house has three bathrooms (one downstairs, two up)–the master bathroom is mostly his (I’ll use it very rarely to pee in the middle of the night, but that’s it) and the upstairs hallway bathroom is completely mine–he never even enters it. The downstairs one we share and use for guests, but since it’s right off the room where we watch TV, we both understand when the other says, “Hey, turn the TV on, willya? I need to use the loo.” I don’t think I could stand being married to somebody who wandered in to take a crap while I was brushing my teeth, and thought nothing of it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-the-toilet-in-front-of-your-partner/556729.md?page=4)