# Do you use "whom" in everyday speech? In email? In formal documents or plea bargains? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 3, 2001, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253 "2001-01-03T16:58:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2001, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253/21 "2001-01-04T02:12:47Z")
yes, i use whom in everyday speech; usually accomp. with a snooty voice. ---
**Author:** ![Kakkerlak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bb73d2/32.png) [@Kakkerlak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kakkerlak)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2001, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253/22 "2001-01-04T02:36:25Z")
In writing, I end up backing up from those horrid prepositions hanging like finger stumps at the end of a mangled sentence and usually find myself correcting the who/whom as well. I believe we have other threads dedicated to the righteous stomping of those who misuse “you’re”, I would like to hijack to say that my own sister, a journalism major, misused “loose” in our own grandmother’s obituary. See how she likes the one I write for her. My boss gave up swearing for the new year, and fines himself $5 for charity every time he indulges. I’ll have to dig up that link to the Shakespearean insult generator so he’ll have something to say. Two years ago I had a bout with a very strange ear infection that caused me to have a really difficult time concentrating, so I’d prepare sentences mentally ahead of time and recite them like a little internal teleprompter. It sounded pretty stilted but it improved my grammar, because it ran past a little mental Brother Peterson (O’Dea High School’s grammar Nazi) in my head before it escaped. Whom’s your daddy ! ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2001, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253/23 "2001-01-04T03:30:01Z")
I use it in writing, but rarely when I’m speaking. I tend to be more pendantic on paper (or computer). ---
**Author:** ![lolagranola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ea5d25/32.png) [@lolagranola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lolagranola)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2001, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253/24 "2001-01-04T14:49:44Z")
I tend to be casual in my speech, but yes, I do use it occasionally. ---
**Author:** ![Chance\_the\_Gardener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@Chance\_the\_Gardener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chance_the_Gardener)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2001, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253/25 "2001-01-04T17:12:25Z")
I use _whom_ in writing and in speech. Many people don’t, and it’s up to them whether they do or not. I don’t care. The English language is evolving to get rid of the word, I’m afraid, but I’ll live with that. I like the word and the concept behind it. Of course, there are places where _whom_ is actually appropriate but I don’t use it at all, since sometimes it just sounds too stilted. I treat the subjunctive mood with the same reserve. Concerning grammar, I’m very conservative, but there are places where even I feel it’s time for change. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/do-you-use-whom-in-everyday-speech-in-email-in-formal-documents-or-plea-bargains/48253.md?page=1)