# Doctor Who. Rule #1: The Doctor lies. Other rules? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 28, 2011, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402 "2011-08-28T17:53:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jharvey963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/54ee81/32.png) [@jharvey963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jharvey963)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/1 "2011-08-28T17:53:27Z")
Just finished watching Doctor Who: Let’s Kill Hitler. (Outstanding episode, I thought, but that’s not what I’m here to talk about.) Near the end of the episode The Doctor spouts a few numbered rules. I didn’t catch all of them, but I did catch: Rule #1: The Doctor lies. Are there other rules that have been mentioned in this series? My google-fu wasn’t strong enough to find a list of the rules anywhere. So, what other rules have you heard? Feel free to list them here. Is there a compendium of rules anywhere? Thanks, J. ---
**Author:** ![standingwave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@standingwave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/standingwave)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/2 "2011-08-29T00:00:48Z")
> [@jharvey963](#): > > Is there a compendium of rules anywhere? Such as it is: [The Doctor’s Rules](http://tardis.wikia.com/wiki/The_Doctor%27s_Rules). Only #1 and #54 predate Let’s Kill Hitler. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/3 "2011-08-29T02:03:51Z")
What makes you think that’s actually rule 1? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/4 "2011-08-29T02:10:19Z")
The Doctor said so in the latest episode. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/5 "2011-08-29T02:14:31Z")
Well, ok, but if the doctor can lie what’s to stop him from lying about what’s rule #1? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/6 "2011-08-29T02:19:30Z")
True. It’s a show that doesn’t worry at all about continuity or making sense, as last night’s “Let’s Kill Hitler” episode shows, so you’re exactly right - he could be lying. ---
**Author:** ![jharvey963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/54ee81/32.png) [@jharvey963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jharvey963)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2011, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/7 "2011-08-29T20:31:20Z")
(My one bump.) Anybody else no of any more rules or list of rules? J. ---
**Author:** ![Monkey\_Chews](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/65b543/32.png) [@Monkey\_Chews](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monkey_Chews)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/8 "2011-08-30T04:37:21Z")
Nope. The rules were basically just in this episode. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/9 "2011-08-31T00:42:49Z")
#1 – Cardio #2 – The Double Tap #3 – Beware of Bathrooms #4 – Seatbelts #7 – Travel Light #17 – Don’t Be A Hero #18 – Limber Up #22 – When In Doubt, Know Your Way Out #31 – Check The Back Seat #32 – Enjoy The Little Things Oops, sorry, those are Zombieland rules… I know, it’s 1; Collect Underpants 2; ??? 3; Profit! D’oh, those are the Underpants Gnomes rules… Hmm, how about… “Once you have their money, you never give it back…” Darnit, that’s a Ferengi Rule of Acquisition… Sorry, I got nothing… ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/10 "2011-08-31T01:08:11Z")
[Gibbs’ Rules](http://www.mikeweatherly.com/2009/07/gibbs-rules-50-rules-but-only-these-have-been-revealed.html) ---
**Author:** ![Elemoh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58f4c7/32.png) [@Elemoh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elemoh)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/11 "2012-05-02T06:15:41Z")
Rule #408: Time is not the boss of you!! I’m pretty sure that showed up in “Let’s kill Hitler” as well!! ---
**Author:** ![Scupper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Scupper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scupper)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/12 "2012-05-02T18:30:23Z")
Rule #31: Rory Williams will die in 33% of all episodes he appears in. Rule #19: 83% of all nefarious schemes are the work of either the Daleks or the Cybermen. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/13 "2012-05-02T18:47:14Z")
Rule 6 – There is NO – (I can’t go through with it). ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/14 "2012-05-02T18:54:17Z")
Maxim 27: Don’t be afraid to be the first to resort to violence. No, wait, that’s Mercenaries… ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/15 "2012-05-02T19:30:39Z")
Rule 2: bowties are cool.\* \*See rule one. ---
**Author:** ![Jennmonkye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/278dde/32.png) [@Jennmonkye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennmonkye)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/16 "2012-05-02T21:40:13Z")
Don’t know if it is more of advice than a rule, but #10 said: “Always bring a banana to a party”…or something thereabouts. Or, my favorite rule which crosses over generations: If you redecorate, the Doctor will say, “I don’t like it”. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2012, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/17 "2012-05-02T22:05:38Z")
[![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/vGG0RSgJT1I/hqdefault.jpg "Doctor Who Strange Noises with My Mouth - deleted scene") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGG0RSgJT1I) ---
**Author:** ![DanaKDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@DanaKDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DanaKDay)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/18 "2013-02-02T16:36:32Z")
The Doctor changes the numbers on his rules as it suits him and the situation. Usually number 1 is “The Doctor lies” - not meaning he is a simple liar; meaning he lies when he thinks it is needed - (such as the way a spy would lie to protect his cover). Rule number 2 is often, “Don’t wander off.”, but companions never obey that. He also does say “Always bring a banana to a party” (because he likes banana daiquiries) I’m not sure that one ever got a number on it. He says “Bow ties are cool” , sometimes it has a rule number, sometimes it doesn’t. He quotes other rules, per each episode, but like I said, the numbers on the rules are not set, which befits travel in a “big ball of timey-wimey stuff”. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/19 "2013-02-02T17:15:51Z")
Run. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2013, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402/20 "2013-02-02T17:42:40Z")
> [@DanaKDay](#): > > He says “Bow ties are cool” , sometimes it has a rule number, sometimes it doesn’t. Can you cite an example of it having a rule number? I don’t recall it ever doing so. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doctor-who-rule-1-the-doctor-lies-other-rules/594402.md?page=2)