# Does anyone else find having a TV constantly on unsettling? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 15, 2014, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675 "2014-11-15T03:46:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c4cdca/32.png) [@race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/race_to_the_bottom)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/61 "2014-11-17T01:34:38Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > Man, I feel like I could have written this. Every year, I just dread going there and it takes me days to get over it. It’s nothing more than a week long forced smile, while I surpress everthing about my personality. The TV being on really adds to me sense of being smothered or overwhelmed by all the endless and inane data. > > I’m convinced the TV being on and the endless small talk is to prevent any kind of real communication. I think they kind of live in fear of someone saying something they’ll have to deal with. > > When we visit, I propose we stay in a nearby hotel and rent a car, so we have some control over how and when we interact, but the passive aggressive vibes emanating from the in-laws make it clear that they do not like this one bit. Get one of these. Be discrete. They will think their TV is on the fritz. Be discrete. Don’t tell the spouse. > **[Amazon.com: TV-B-Gone - Turn Off Any TV - North America, Australia : Electronics](https://www.amazon.com/TV-B-Gone-Universal-TV-Control-Keychain/dp/B0006GD9CE)** > > Buy TV-B-Gone - Turn Off Any TV - North America, Australia: Remote Controls - Amazon.com ✓ FREE DELIVERY possible on eligible purchases ---
**Author:** ![race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c4cdca/32.png) [@race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/race_to_the_bottom)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/62 "2014-11-17T01:36:44Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > I feel the exact same way. If you’re not actively watching it, turn it off. > > My wife will turn on the news when she gets up and, when I wake up later, I will hear the TV and just _feel_ my blood pressure rise. Sometimes (rarely) she will sleep in and I’ll get my daughter up and about, and she (my daughter) always comments about how calm it is when I get her up than compared to when her mother does so. Like I tell her: it’s because I don’t have that damned TV on! > > I will say that I’m pretty sensitive to noise and I’m sure that has something to do with this (for me, at least.) Hook one of these up to your TV and get some good headphones for the wife; maybe even a wireles setup. > **[Amazon.com: Digital to Analog Audio Converter with USB and Headphone Amplifier...](https://www.amazon.com/Digital-Analog-Converter-USB-HDTVHOOKUP/dp/B0038HX3S8)** > > Supports either Bitstream or LPCM Please note this will NOT convert Dolby. Our Digital to Analog Decoder takes audio encoded Digital Signal from your multichannel S/PDIF or TOSLINK digital audio source and converts it to L/R (Red and White Jack)... In our house, if someone wants to watch TV alone, this is the solution. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/63 "2014-11-17T02:01:35Z")
Some of my coworkers and I were invited to dinner when we were out of town at the home of a collegue. She and her partner made an amazing dinner. We had lots to talk about. In the living room, attached to the dining room, a TV was on the entire evening. Strange. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/64 "2014-11-17T06:33:18Z")
When I’m there, I just say “is anyone watching this, no?” Click. But then somehow, it magically comes back on when I’m not looking. It is really weird to me that some people are uncomfortable with being in their own head. Life must be really hard like that. ---
**Author:** ![Arabella\_Flynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Arabella\_Flynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arabella_Flynn)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/65 "2014-11-17T07:27:05Z")
I don’t have the TV (well, Netflix/Hulu/YouTube) on all the time, but I almost always have it on in a similar fashion while I’m working on the computer. It’s not tuned to just anything; it’s usually something vaguely science-y like forensics documentaries or “How It’s Made”, or a series with a season-long story arc that I can sit down and watch in blocks. It’s just compelling enough that I won’t give into the temptation to get up and wander around out of range when I should be sitting at the computer working, but it’s not exactly of world-shaking importance, so I can easily slip into ignoring it when I need to concentrate on the laptop. I also tend to fall asleep with the TV on, or some kind of audio running. My brain is not great at shutting down or booting up all at the same time, especially if some kind of noise startles me halfway awake. While the [hypnogogic stuff](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypnagogia) is kind of fascinating on an intellectual level, it’s not very helpful when I’m trying to sleep. I block out the sounds of neighbors and roommates with a noise that I can immediately identify as speech and also immediately identify as nothing I need to pay any real attention to. Whether I can understand the speech seems to be irrelevant. I used BBC Radio Cymru for a while, and the closest I’ve ever gotten to having Welsh lessons was watching Torchwood. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/66 "2014-11-17T13:20:50Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > When I’m there, I just say “is anyone watching this, no?” Click. > > But then somehow, it magically comes back on when I’m not looking. > > It is really weird to me that some people are uncomfortable with being in their own head. Life must be really hard like that. I’ve never been able to work in any way, shape, or form in absolute total silence. It makes me antsy. My husband and our housemates cannot fathom it because they’re of the “turn it off if you’re not watching it” school. I have no issues getting inside my own head when there’s a lot of stimulation around – in fact, it helps me get into my own head more than silence. I don’t know how else to explain it. What drives me crazy is actual conversation that interrupts the steady “hum” or “banter”. That drives me nuts especially when I’m working on something. Think of as background music. One reason why I’d rather have the TV on is because I’m less likely to sing and/or dance to it. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/67 "2014-11-17T20:27:55Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Straight Dope Message Board, November 15, 2027: > > We’re about to visit my in-laws and they always drive me nuts. They’re constantly fiddling with their smartphones and tablets while we’re there… This happens in my world right now. I hate tv. Unless I’m watching one of my shows then I hate it and it must be off. I stopped being friends with one person because she would not turn off the tv when we were talking. It is so rude. One day I had enough and I just up and left without mentioning why. ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/68 "2014-11-17T20:34:07Z")
> [@Arabella\_Flynn](#): > > I don’t have the TV (well, Netflix/Hulu/YouTube) on all the time, but I almost always have it on in a similar fashion while I’m working on the computer. It’s not tuned to just anything; it’s usually something vaguely science-y like forensics documentaries or “How It’s Made”, or a series with a season-long story arc that I can sit down and watch in blocks. It’s just compelling enough that I won’t give into the temptation to get up and wander around out of range when I should be sitting at the computer working, but it’s not exactly of world-shaking importance, so I can easily slip into ignoring it when I need to concentrate on the laptop. I was delighted to read this, because I do the exact same thing. If I’m working on some tedious task at home, I’ll crank up Netflix and set it to play _Forensic Files_ or _Mythbusters_ episodes continuously while I’m working. Somehow that seems to occupy the part of my brain that gets bored and tells me to wander off instead of working on the tedious chore. ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/69 "2014-11-17T21:16:25Z")
I’m one of those that prefers to have background noise. Even if I’m going to be messing around on my laptop at home, I’ll turn on CNN or something of the sort. I also need to have noise on when I am trying to sleep, or I get way too in my own thoughts and become restless. It would either be the tv or the radio (a major point of contention with my ex), but lately I’ve found that the white noise from my fan seems to do the trick. ---
**Author:** ![GreenElf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9de053/32.png) [@GreenElf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreenElf)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/70 "2014-11-17T22:04:21Z")
To be honest, sometimes I find the TV a comforting distraction, like when I’m in the company of blowhard relatives or waiting for bad news, or to go somewhere I’m dreading like a job interview. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/71 "2014-11-17T22:19:46Z")
My mom watches TV constantly and it drives me crazy. Then again, she’s lived on her own since I left for college, so I imagine she likes the background noise. But it still drives me up a wall that when she visits, she keeps it on at _our_ house all the damn time. We have a “no TV on weeknights” rule for the kids. But she doesn’t care - just flips it on and will NOT turn it off, so our options are either to break the rules and let them watch whatever she feels like or banish them from the room where we’re visiting. I hate that. Then when the kids are in bed and there’s a show on we actually like (her preference is generally the cooking network or Andy Griffith), she will not stop talking. If you want to have a conversation, leave the stinking TV off, for Pete’s sake. She requires responses on every little comment she makes and gets irritated if I don’t at least say, “Oh, interesting,” if she comments on what she had for dinner two weeks ago. I love her, but that’s one way we’re so very different: she cannot stand silence. I can’t get enough of it. But her house is as quiet as mine is noisy. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/72 "2014-11-18T03:57:29Z")
> [@Becky2844](#): > > Well, I don’t think I’m _too_ stoopid but I’m a child of the '50s. TV was new and wonderful and a luxurious necessity. Everybody did it. When I grew up having a TV on just felt right. > > When I’m inside if it’s not on and I’m not otherwise occupied, the silence is too deep and my mind is too loud. I either start my compulsive rumination or I start writing (in my head)…which is probably why I write. So the white noise neutralizes that when I’m not ready to deal. It’s a breather of sorts, a buffer between me and me. This might be why my mother-in-law insists on keeping the TV on all the damn time (and tuned to the Hallmark Channel, at that!). That, and I’m sure she’s lonely and likes it for the voices. For my part, it drives me to distraction. And this for two reasons: one, “no TV if no one is watching/if the room is empty” was one of my mother’s iron-clad rules, and it still bothers me to break that taboo. The other reason is that I am ADD, and broadcasting TV is like a magnet to me - I can’t take my eyes off it. Makes it very hard to concentrate on the people I’m with. That’s true whether it’s in someone’s home, or in a restaurant. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/73 "2014-11-18T06:28:50Z")
> [@Llama\_Llogophile](#): > > Not only do I hate having a TV on when I’m not actively watching it, I’ll mute any commercials instantly. It drives me nuts to hear advertising, and I can’t understand why people permit it. I do that, too - I have zero interest in having advertising blared at me. When we visit my sister and brother-in-law, they often show us tv shows that they think we’d like, but they don’t mute the commercials, so we have to yell at each other to talk over them. Just mute it! One button - done! > [@Trinopus](#): > > \ > I dislike restaurants that have big-screen TVs on. I’m a kid of the Star Trek generation, and I was strongly conditioned to watch. It’s very difficult not to look at a TV screen. In such restaurants, I always ask to be seated with my back to the TV. > > (And…my dinner companions tend to become hypnotized by the damn thing, just the same way I would have!) I hate the ubiquitous tvs in restaurants, too. I try to focus on my husband and not the tv, but it’s really freaking hard to ignore the bright colours and flashing lights. Hey, we need to invent dining glasses - glasses you can wear that block out tv signals from your eyes! I’m pretty sure I watch way too much tv, but I don’t have the set on all the time. I watch a few shows in the evening, and other than that, the set is off. I like my peace and quiet, and I like music - I don’t like blathering in the background. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/74 "2014-11-18T13:54:33Z")
I like quiet. I have a TV but it’s only for Netflix or formdvds…that is it isnt even plugged in to get local channels and obviously I don’t have any cable. I dont get the TV on all the time either and it would drive me batty. ---
**Author:** ![Sterling\_Archer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Sterling\_Archer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sterling_Archer)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/75 "2014-11-18T16:18:11Z")
Auugh! Huge pet peeve. I will just flat out ask people, “Is anyone watching this? It is distracting me.” I can kinda understand it when I am at a relative’s house and that’s just how they are, but I have been at dinner parties with friends my own age who leave the TV on the whole time, including during dinner. Fine if a football game people are watching is on or something, but they’ll just have America’s Next Top Model or something equally vapid on as background. I sometimes sneak over and turn the volume almost all the way down and then wait to see if the host “fixes” it. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/76 "2014-11-18T16:38:55Z")
I was just thinking about this this morning in annoyance. I had to go to the allergist’s. First I was in the waiting room to wait for the doctor, in which there were two TVs. One was for the adults, and on a game. The other was for the kids, and it was playing some Mickey Mouse show. Adults have magazines and kids have toys. No one was watching the TV! Then the other waiting room for the shots had another TV, which was on the Price is Right, which was super annoying what with all the screams and yells. And before that they had the news, which said the same things twice. I’m not stuck up about TV. I watch lots of TV, lots of shows and movies. But I don’t see why it has to be ubiquitous everywhere, and you can be damned sure I don’t watch advertising in my own home. I can’t avoid the loud adverts at the doctor’s office. ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2014, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/77 "2014-11-18T22:56:45Z")
I don’t mind the old folks at home with their TV on (_The Price Is Right!_), but what really bothers me is my middle-aged brother with the TV on but the only channel it gets is Fox News. All day and all night. And loud enough, so it can drown out the Christian radio station going full blast in the empty kitchen. ---
**Author:** ![L-Jay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9e8a1a/32.png) [@L-Jay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/L-Jay)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2022, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/78 "2022-03-20T16:46:57Z")
I ended up moving out of a house I shared with my best friend because she had the TV on all day long. Not only that, the TV in her bedroom upstairs was also usually on, so there was just no place for me to escape. I need peace and quiet. After I moved into my new house, I decided not to buy a TV at all. I have very rarely regretted that decision and am grateful that I’m now able to concentrate and be fully engaged with life again… ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2022, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/79 "2022-03-21T20:48:41Z")
Welcome, **L-Jay**! I don’t want you to feel alone (this thread is, what, over six years old? And the people who have opinions may have expressed them long ago). I’m with you! I love quiet. Often when I’m home alone (like right now!) I’ll have no TV, no lights, no nothin’ on. Then my wife’ll come home, say “Honestly, why are you sitting here in the dark?” and turn on every light and the TV. . (ps: You’ve inspired me. I’m now turning off the computer as well…) ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2022, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675/80 "2022-03-21T21:04:57Z")
I had to check the thread for my name before posting, because this topic is incredibly sensitive to me and I might have ranted upthread without even remembering. I’m with the OP – hate, hate, hate, can’t tolerate, inappropriate flip-out levels of intolerance. Icepick in my eardrums level of intolerance when I encounter this. This is a big part of why I’m not closer to certain family members, sorry to say. At a certain house, there are about 8 different TVs in 6 different rooms. The last time I was there, I left the living room to go to my guest room, passing though the empty, darkened breakfast nook with the TV on, then the empty darkened kitchen with the TV on. I turned off both without even thinking about it, then went down for a nap. Half hour later I emerged to find both TVs turned back on, both rooms still dark and unused. I’m sure the constant background noise is very comforting to some people, though it’s torture for me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-anyone-else-find-having-a-tv-constantly-on-unsettling/704675.md?page=5)