# Does God ever lie in the Bible? Secondary: Does he ever laugh? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [April 19, 2014, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478 "2014-04-19T08:42:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/21 "2014-04-19T14:20:00Z")
**The Skeptic’s Annotated Bible** on whether or not God Lies: [http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/contra/god\_lie.html](http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/contra/god_lie.html) ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/22 "2014-04-19T14:39:51Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > I heard better jokes. 😉 He wouldn’t even make it as an open miker. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/23 "2014-04-19T15:22:54Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > He lies in the first couple pages. He tells Adam and Eve eating the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge will kill them. They eat it, it doesn’t kill them. > > Oddly, Satan (or at least, the serpent, whose often associated with Satan), tells them the truth. Misdirection on both sides. Eating the forbidden fruit will bring them death - but not immediately. YHWH makes the threat more dire than it is, treating his creatures as children who will not understand nuance, and the Serpent takes advantage of that. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/24 "2014-04-19T15:58:21Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > **The Skeptic’s Annotated Bible** on whether or not God Lies: > [http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/contra/god\_lie.html](http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/contra/god_lie.html) God both lies and never lies. How convenient. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/25 "2014-04-19T16:11:25Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > God both lies and never lies. How convenient. Downright divine and ineffable. And this is from the _skeptics_, mind. ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/26 "2014-04-19T16:30:53Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > See: > [http://carm.org/god-send-deceiving-spirit-1kings-22-22](http://carm.org/god-send-deceiving-spirit-1kings-22-22) I found the analysis in the link a bit disturbing. Sort of like God invoking plausible deniability. :dubious: Kinda like: “I honestly had no idea that the CIA would take things that far.” ``` -or- ``` “I’m gonna hafta send Vinnie to have a little chat wit’ ye” ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/27 "2014-04-19T16:33:36Z")
> [@md2000](#): > > Well, God does let the Devil play games with Job. “He’s my most faithful servant? OK, I’ll take your bet. You torture him with boils and pestilence, death and calamity, and we’ll see if he curses my name…” > > Our religion teacher once mentioned how bland the gospels were - when Jesus is a child and gets lost at the temple, do you really think his mother says “son, thy father and I have been looking for you…”? Of did she say “You little schmuck, where the hell have you been for three days???” > > Moses had to strike the rock twice to bring forth water, instead of commanding the water like the Lord told him - therefore he was barred from the holy land forever. God appears to be a holy dick. > > God tells Abraham to sacrifice Isaac and then stops him at the last moment. So technically this would have been a lie, telling someone “you have to kill your son, I order you” and then “never mind, I was just f\*\*\*ing with ya!” Yeah, those are real thigh-slappers! ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/28 "2014-04-19T16:35:55Z")
> [@md2000](#): > > Well, God does let the Devil play games with Job. “He’s my most faithful servant? OK, I’ll take your bet. You torture him with boils and pestilence, death and calamity, and we’ll see if he curses my name…” Actually, this was okay, 'cuz after the bet was paid up, He gave Job brand new kids to replace his dead ones. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/29 "2014-04-19T19:18:06Z")
Well he told mankind for several thousand years that they needed to hack off bits of their dick to get in Heaven. Ha-HAH! ---
**Author:** ![Mk\_VII](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Mk\_VII](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mk_VII)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/30 "2014-04-19T19:24:57Z")
When Christ calls Peter ‘the rock on which I will build my church’ he makes a pun on _petros_ [rock] (whether it works as well in Aramaic instead of Greek I don’t know) ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/31 "2014-04-19T19:30:00Z")
> [@Sage\_Rat](#): > > Well he told mankind for several thousand years that they needed to hack off bits of their dick to get in Heaven. Technically (since this is still in GQ, after all), God’s covenant with Abraham, which is where circumcision was required, said nothing about getting into Heaven, which is a concept that appears little if at all in the Old Testament. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/32 "2014-04-19T19:35:07Z")
It’s not the same thing as what the OP asks, but Cecil has addressed [Are there any jokes in the Bible?](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1165/are-there-any-jokes-in-the-bible) (There have also been [threads](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=482148) discussing this column.) ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/33 "2014-04-19T19:58:06Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Misdirection on both sides. Eating the forbidden fruit will bring them death - but not immediately. YHWH makes the threat more dire than it is, treating his creatures as children who will not understand nuance, and the Serpent takes advantage of that. Rubbish. As it says, [QUOTE= Genesis Ch. 2] 15 Then the LORD God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it. 16 The LORD God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; 17 but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for **in the day that you eat from it** you will surely die.” [/QUOTE] Now, it’s possible that the transcribers and translators have somewhere gotten it wrong, and the original verse never said or meant “that day,” but consider also this: [QUOTE=Genesis 3] 22 And the Lord God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.” [/QUOTE] Adam and Eve would not live forever without eating from the tree of life – this apparently was not forbidden but it was not certain, either. Had God meant for them to live forever, Adam and Eve would have been created immortal, or directed to eat from the tree of life. As it was, they were going to die anyway. So God lied about the fruit - it neither killed them immediately nor was it the cause of their mortality. It’s still possible that the hair-splitting SOB meant “in the day that you eat from it, your death will become a certainty (whereas you presently have a shot at immortality that I haven’t told you about, and won’t mention now).” Since there was a chance that they might eat from the tree of life first, and then from the tree of knowledge, this interpretation is also a lie. What he really meant was that if they ate, he would curse them and their children until the end of time, and the only reason he didn’t just say that was either because he wanted them to fail, or because he hated telling the truth. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2014, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/34 "2014-04-19T20:26:38Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > It’s not clear to me that the use of puns in Jesus’ discourse is even meant to be humorous – it might have simply been a rhetorical technique, an easy mnemonic. Certainly nothing else suggests he was being funny. So, either he was using rhetorical tricks to manipulate the crowd, or he was cracking jokes. I prefer the latter, but agree it’s a bit of a stretch. ---
**Author:** ![TSBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@TSBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TSBG)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/35 "2014-04-20T00:09:10Z")
I would suggest that the sense of humor current among the people alive at the time of Jesus, and in the time of the old testament, was most likely more along the lines of the Three Stooges than anything modern sophisticates would call humorous. And remember there are still many, many people–not all adolescents–who find slapstick and toilet humor hilarious. I find it entirely possible that an ancient audience might have found the story of Job funny. Or Lot’s wife. “Stupid b\*\*\*\*! Hahahaha!” ---
**Author:** ![randompattern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@randompattern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randompattern)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/36 "2014-04-20T00:20:43Z")
The god character wasn’t written for humor, more sci-fi / drama I think. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/37 "2014-04-20T01:17:28Z")
… [QUOTE=PS 2] 4 The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c57346/32.png) [@Little\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Pig)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/38 "2014-04-20T02:03:38Z")
It appears He felt remorse after the flood thing. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/39 "2014-04-20T02:37:20Z")
Not letting people eat bacon is pretty hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![butterfiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b3f665/32.png) [@butterfiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butterfiles)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2014, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478/40 "2014-04-20T04:53:30Z")
> [@Superhal](#): > > Not letting people eat bacon is pretty hilarious. How is that hilarious? I’m not seeing the humor in any of the above except maybe the foreskin bit. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-god-ever-lie-in-the-bible-secondary-does-he-ever-laugh/686478.md?page=3)