# Does it take a village? Or MYOB? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 18, 2019, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789 "2019-02-18T20:46:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/1 "2019-02-18T20:46:46Z")
This question is based on hearsay so I don’t intend to do anything, but I’d still like to solicit opinions. A woman is supposedly home-schooling her children. At ages 8 and 6, neither one has been taught to read. Apparently, they’ll “pick it up” when they need to. And she’s pregnant with #3, there’s a potential future illiterate on the way. I don’t know a lot about home schooling, but I was under the impression that the state/county/local board of education was supposed to monitor kids in these situations. If it’s true that the kids can’t read yet, it makes me wonder if the BoE is falling down on the job, also. The question: If you knew for certain that some home-schooled kids were not, in fact, being schooled, would you do anything about it? If so, what would you do? If a close friend claimed to be home-schooling his/her kids, but it was apparent that they weren’t, would you say anything to your friend? What about if it was a relative? As I said, I have no proof in the particular case that prompted this question, and I’m certainly not going to ask a stranger if her kids can read. I know there are success stories among home-schooled kids (my husband’s cousins among them) but I’m guessing there are some totally unschooled kids out there. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/2 "2019-02-18T21:04:54Z")
MYOB? Or at the least talk to her about the curriculum and where reading comes in. It’s common enough to approach books with the idea: kids need to be kids and discover their physical world while they still have that curiosity–a book’s got nothing to teach a 6 year old that will grow their spirit. My oldest was in a private school that didn’t put reading on the “to do” list until 3rd grade. Our situation changed and she ended up being enrolled in public school grade 3 with minimal/no reading ability. She picked it up _fast_. Got through Harry Potter Sorcerer’s stone & Azkaban before the end of the school year, wrapped up Order of the Phoenix before the end of summer. She’s in college now. She reads good, AND she’s got a well-developed inner 8 year old. I guess if I had a homeschooling neighbor and I cared about the results, I would talk to them about the program and what it focuses on. And Radkey were homeschooled, so there’s that. They are amazing musicians/lyricists. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/3 "2019-02-18T21:05:32Z")
I knew a woman who was educated at a Steiner/Waldorf school, which didn’t teach reading to young children (Wikipedia suggests starting at age 7). She was a math grad student and an avid reader, so it didn’t seem to hurt her too much, but she was kind of scornful of her early education. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/4 "2019-02-18T21:11:59Z")
My daughter went to elementary school in Floriduh, and I remember her primary grade teachers telling me about “Whole Language.” They told me they didn’t bother to correct spelling or grammar - it was more important for the kids to learn to get their ideas in writing. My daughter is 33, and she can’t spell. I greatly regret following their advice. But she’s a voracious reader, so there’s that. And my granddaughter is 10 months old and she’s got a huge library. She’s already been introduced to books, and I expect she’ll be reading before she gets to kindergarten. We shall see. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/5 "2019-02-18T21:14:52Z")
the involvement of the authorities depend on the location I know in ca before the incident with the parents locking and abusing the 7 or 8 kids there was very little involved in setting up a home school all you needed was a room and a name and you could register your house as a school ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/6 "2019-02-18T21:17:03Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > My daughter is 33, and she can’t spell…But she’s a voracious reader, so there’s that. Oh, she can spell just fine. It’s just that she was taught early on that spelling doesn’t matter. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/7 "2019-02-18T21:24:24Z")
Outside of my own kids and probably my nieces/nephews, I would MMOB. If I did feel the need to investigate, I’d ask the parents directly about the curriculum and about the level of involvement of the BOE. If I felt they were negligent, report 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/8 "2019-02-18T21:32:43Z")
If I have reasonable suspicion of child abuse, then I am legally obligated to report it to the authorities. A “home-schooled” 8-year-old who is not being taught how to read is child abuse. > [@](#): > > Quoth **Inigo Montoya** : > > It’s common enough to approach books with the idea: kids need to be kids and discover their physical world while they still have that curiosity–a book’s got nothing to teach a 6 year old that will grow their spirit. They also need to learn language skills while they’re still young, because it will be much harder or impossible later. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/9 "2019-02-18T21:34:36Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > I don’t know a lot about home schooling, but I was under the impression that the state/county/local board of education was supposed to monitor kids in these situations. [Definitely not true in Missouri.](https://dese.mo.gov/communications/frequently-asked-questions-and-educational-topics) > [@](#): > > The Department does not regulate or monitor home schooling. There is no registration required with the state. There is no program for the inspection, approval, or accreditation of home schools in Missouri. Your state laws may vary. ---
**Author:** ![Royal\_Nonesutch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecb155/32.png) [@Royal\_Nonesutch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Royal_Nonesutch)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/10 "2019-02-18T21:37:40Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > …I’m certainly not going to ask a stranger if her kids can read. I understand that everyone is different, but I have whiled away many happy hours on long, boring flights by asking strangers if their children know how to read, as well as inquiring about their family bathing habits and their opinions about the judicious, measured use of hallucinogenic Peruvian cacti. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/11 "2019-02-18T21:44:44Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > They also need to learn language skills while they’re still young, because it will be much harder or impossible later. Which they just can’t get through actually conversing with people about things they see, feel, or believe; singing, telling/listening to stories…? The contents of a book are important, but they are not housed exclusively (or even predominantly) in the writing. Writing is just codification of ideas. Developing, receiving, and analyzing ideas is what is important. Writing is just a tool that can be learned whenever local unwritten ideas start lacking the breadth and depth necessary for further development. Yeah, eventually it’s a good idea to learn how to read & write. But that’s just one of hundreds of tools a person will only eventually come to need. There’s no real rush but sometime before, I dunno, 14 is good. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/12 "2019-02-18T22:09:20Z")
I just looked up [Maryland Homeschool Regulations](http://www.mdhsa.com/legal/comar.php), and here what it says in part: > [@](#): > > ``` > (1) A parent or guardian who chooses to provide a home instruction program for his or her child shall maintain a > portfolio of materials which: > > (a) Demonstrates the parent or guardian is providing regular, thorough instruction during the school year in > the areas specified in §C(1); > > (b) Includes relevant materials, such as instructional materials, reading materials, and examples of the child's > writings, worksheets, workbooks, creative materials, and tests; and > > (c) Shall be reviewed by the local superintendent or the superintendent's designee at the conclusion of each > semester of the local school system at such times as are mutually agreeable to the local superintendent or > designee and the parent or guardian. > > ``` So if the county superintendent is doing his/her job, the county should be getting a good picture of what’s going on. This assumes that the parents registered their kids as being homeschooled. Like I said, I don’t have direct knowledge of the situation - just what was relayed to me second or third hand. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2019, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/13 "2019-02-18T22:10:35Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > [Definitely not true in Missouri.](https://dese.mo.gov/communications/frequently-asked-questions-and-educational-topics) > > Your state laws may vary. Exactly, there is no uniformity from state to state and even in states with nominal regulation the degree of actual active enforcement varies. That everyone must be reading and writing to satisfy a certain standardized test parameter by age X may be desirable, but it is not necessarily abuse because it happens later or earlier… as long as there\* is \*education at all. I’d be happy with effective oversight of _that_. Teach them in the style you will, but _do_ teach them. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/14 "2019-02-19T00:30:56Z")
I used to say i needed a whole county for the lil’wrekker. I availed myself and herself of all available help. She has never failed me scholastically. Very book-wormy. Her life skills may be on the downside since she’s moved on to higher education. Sometimes I wonder if she’ll ever grow up. I do know she’s potty trained, so there’s that. But, people warned me and bugged me about her lack of self sufficiency. I didn’t like them to tell me these things. It made me try harder though. I started late but I did get her driving and cooking a tiny bit. Oh, and doing laundry. She still brings me bags on the weekends. And, no, I don’t do it all, I make her help. My biggest obstacle is her money/ budget management. She’s so spoiled. Other than that, she’s perfect.🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/15 "2019-02-19T00:54:49Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > My daughter went to elementary school in Floriduh, and I remember her primary grade teachers telling me about “Whole Language.” They told me they didn’t bother to correct spelling or grammar - it was more important for the kids to learn to get their ideas in writing. My daughter is 33, and she can’t spell. I greatly regret following their advice. > > But she’s a voracious reader, so there’s that. And my granddaughter is 10 months old and she’s got a huge library. She’s already been introduced to books, and I expect she’ll be reading before she gets to kindergarten. We shall see. I also had the same experience with my daughter, thank goodness for spell check. The states set the standards, so I would think this home schooling parent needs to be teaching those, how mom instructs is up to her, but if the standard says for example, “Respond to literature by citing textual evidence.” That is one thing that should be taught. On the other hand, another teacher and I were having a conversation one day about the pressure put on kids. As she said, they are pressured to read in kindergarten, and it continues from that point. Then they get to middle school and high school and people wonder why the hell so many of these kids have anxiety. So, maybe mom is onto something. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/16 "2019-02-19T01:57:52Z")
^^^I totally agree with idea that kids are over pressured. Anxiety is just the onset of many problems teens have. IMO. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/17 "2019-02-19T05:37:59Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Oh, she can spell just fine. It’s just that she was taught early on that spelling doesn’t matter. :smack: It doesn’t though. Neither does math. ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/18 "2019-02-19T07:26:32Z")
> [@Royal\_Nonesutch](#): > > I understand that everyone is different, but I have whiled away many happy hours on long, boring flights by asking strangers if their children know how to read, as well as inquiring about their family bathing habits and their opinions about the judicious, measured use of hallucinogenic Peruvian cacti. On international flights, you’ll discover that in some countries, /nobody/ learns to read before they are 8 or 9. And have learned 3 languages. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/19 "2019-02-19T08:11:11Z")
I’m opposed to the government allowing homeschooling in the first place, so put me down as a villager. In the OP’s case, I’d go straight to CPS and the BoE. Not teaching the 6 yo is perfectly fine, no problem with that. Not teaching the 8 yo is, IMO, criminal negligence. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2019, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789/20 "2019-02-19T14:29:17Z")
I don’t understand why lazy parents don’t just send their kids to school, if they aren’t going to actually homeschool. StG [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-it-take-a-village-or-myob/829789.md?page=2)