# Does (nearly) everything have to be qualified nowadays? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 27, 2005, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308 "2005-04-27T02:59:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/61 "2005-04-27T20:21:50Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > …So **Icarus** says, “Twenty bucks, same as in town.” > > Sorry, I just can’t **feel** it. > > Regards, > Shodan …nobody ever said comedy was easy. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/62 "2005-04-27T20:23:04Z")
How does **Icarus** cross the road? We’ll just have to wait for him to post to find out! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Wow! That’s so much better! Thanks, **Matt**! ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/63 "2005-04-27T20:43:19Z")
[QUOTE=JohnT] Honestly, people, can’t you just let it go? Do you have to jump on everybody who uses group-speak, especially in a friggin’ _joke_ thread? /QUOTE] As one of the people you are currently bitching about, I’d like to know where I “jumped on everyone”? I requested that people don’t make assumptions based on my gender. If I’m in a pissy mood, then I’m in a pissy mood, I don’t have PMS. If I’m a bitch, it’s because I’m a bitch, not because I’m a woman. **JohnT** , from what I see, you’re the one doing all the bitching in the “Woman-speak” thread. A couple of us were just expressing our distaste for it. I guess I missed the sticky thread stating that opposing views were no longer allowed. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/64 "2005-04-27T20:50:57Z")
You’re not wearing a bra, are you? Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/65 "2005-04-27T21:36:00Z")
[QUOTE=Tastes of Chocolate] > [@JohnT](#): > > Honestly, people, can’t you just let it go? Do you have to jump on everybody who uses group-speak, especially in a friggin’ _joke_ thread? /QUOTE] > > As one of the people you are currently bitching about, I’d like to know where I “jumped on everyone”? I requested that people don’t make assumptions based on my gender. > > If I’m in a pissy mood, then I’m in a pissy mood, I don’t have PMS. If I’m a bitch, it’s because I’m a bitch, not because I’m a woman. > > **JohnT** , from what I see, you’re the one doing all the bitching in the “Woman-speak” thread. A couple of us were just expressing our distaste for it. I guess I missed the sticky thread stating that opposing views were no longer allowed. Yup. 4 posts. That, apparently, is the new definition of **all**. Also, this apparently does not fit the definition of “bitching” (and I’m _so_ thrilled that you were the one who originally used that _sexist_ word, lest I get accused of iinsensitivity.) > [@](#): > > I’m going to totally back Elysian on this one. Usually when this kind of stuff comes up, I blow it off, figuring it’s not worth my time. > > But Elysian has a very valid point. Please don’t lump me in with 51% of the population. Please don’t assume that everything I say is a calculated attempt to screw you over. Please don’t keep patronize me (or Elysian, or any other woman) by patting me on the head, and telling me that you know what I mean better then I do. > > You might think you’re being witty and intelligent by discovering what women “really mean” when we say something. I think you are failing to listen to what we really have to say and triviallizing us. So, now you can all go back to your no-girls-allowed treehouse with the secret handshake, and I can go back to ignoring these threads. Sounds like “bitching” to me! ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/66 "2005-04-27T21:42:20Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > How does **Icarus** cross the road? The joke is “Why did the Icarus cross the road?” Geez, you Icaruses are so… ---
**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/67 "2005-04-27T22:01:32Z")
Someone on the thread (too lazy to scroll back and see who, possibly several someones) made a fine point. Some folks are all up in arms against satirizing against sex, sexual preference or race. But apparently their sense of outrage stops when you get to religious folks, political stance, or other matters. So it’s OK to be selectively offended by things. It’s ok to make fun of selected groups of people. You just have to have the secret code book and ring to know which people you are allowed to make fun of. And I can sell you that book for $47.95. The ring is extra. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/68 "2005-04-27T22:12:22Z")
[QUOTE=JohnT] > [@Tastes of Chocolate](#): > > (and I’m _so_ thrilled that you were the one who originally used that _sexist_ word, lest I get accused of iinsensitivity.) Odd, I never used the word sexist, in this thread OR the parent thread. And if THAT’S your idea of bitching, you should see me when I’m actually mad. ---
**Author:** ![Elysian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@Elysian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysian)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/69 "2005-04-27T22:13:05Z")
Thanks, **ToC** for expressing it better than I could have 😉 Men get awful touchy when they’re accused of overgeneralizing, don’t they? How cute. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2005, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/70 "2005-04-27T23:08:43Z")
> [@Elysian](#): > > Thanks, **ToC** for expressing it better than I could have 😉 Men get awful touchy when they’re accused of overgeneralizing, don’t they? How cute. I beleive I explained the difference between a lighthearted joke thread, and a thread when said thread must be seriously defended when someone gets seriously offended. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/71 "2005-04-28T00:25:58Z")
> [@Elysian](#): > > Thanks, **ToC** for expressing it better than I could have 😉 Men get awful touchy when they’re accused of overgeneralizing, don’t they? How cute. Now, why couldn’t you have brought that attitude in the _joke_ thread? 😛 I’m glad to see you got the point! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/72 "2005-04-28T00:36:15Z")
[QUOTE=Tastes of Chocolate] > [@JohnT](#): > > Odd, I never used the word sexist, in this thread OR the parent thread. > > And if THAT’S your idea of bitching, you should see me when I’m actually mad. Not to answer for **JohnT** (and if I’m wrong, **John** , please correct me), but I think he’s saying that the word “bitching” is sexist, not that you used the word “sexist”. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/73 "2005-04-28T01:13:46Z")
[QUOTE=Anastasaeon] > [@Tastes of Chocolate](#): > > Not to answer for **JohnT** (and if I’m wrong, **John** , please correct me), but I think he’s saying that the word “bitching” is sexist, not that you used the word “sexist”. That’s precisely what I meant. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/74 "2005-04-28T01:38:58Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > Hey, after seeing what the trees did to Sonny Bono and that other guy who got whacked skiing, I take trees _very_ seriously! [**Doug** would like to apologize for the following hijack.] What happened to Sonny was just karmic payback for the Digital Till-Hell-Freezes-Over Copyright Act. [Here endeth the hijack.] ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/75 "2005-04-28T01:46:55Z")
> [@lightingtool](#): > > However, at the time I just assumed that poster had just gone through (or was still in) a pretty bad relationship, and was really just posting about events that had happened with a current or former SO. People go through bad times, and sometimes the best thing to do is try to get a laugh out of a bad situation. This is exactly what worries me: a tendency I’ve noted to blame the failings of one’s SO on the entire other gender. I don’t understand it and I think it’s disturbing. In general, I just don’t understand why people are so quick, in general, to attribute everything a person might do to their gender, either _because_ of it or _in spite_ of it. Yes, I realize this makes me unusual. > [@](#): > > You are going to live a very sad little life if you spend your time trying to find prejudice in everything. Do you ever laugh? Are you seriously arguing that racist, sexist, and homophobic jokes are the only ones in existence? That certainly hasn’t been my experience. I don’t get why they’re funny, and I don’t get why people bother to tell them. I really can’t do anything to stop you telling these jokes, if you insist on doing so. All I can do is voice my opinion. If I’m really so off the beam, you’ll be able to return to your joking without further ado. > [@](#): > > But apparently their sense of outrage stops when you get to religious folks, political stance, or other matters. Right: a belief is something with which a sensible person can disagree. Nobody says, for example, that you can’t mock me for being a New Democrat. As for religion, I try to avoid mocking other people’s religious beliefs until they enter the realm of public policy. However, a race, a gender, or a sexual orientation is not a proposition, something with which someone can disagree, so there’s no point in satirizing it. ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/76 "2005-04-28T01:54:25Z")
> [@BurnMeUp](#): > > But apparently their sense of outrage stops when you get to religious folks, political stance, or other matters. > > So it’s OK to be selectively offended by things. It’s ok to make fun of selected groups of people. You just have to have the secret code book and ring to know which people you are allowed to make fun of. Which pretty much just extends the syndrome, IMO. Anybody, of any niche, can be offended by just about anything if that’s what they’re looking for. In the deathless words of a managment/motivational speaker (now _there’s_ ripe fodder for ridicule–“If you’re a hammer, every problem can be solved by a nail.” I think it was supposed to be profound, but what the heck: no cliche left wasted, right? Humor’s subjective as hell, mostly because some of it is rooted in ribbing, mockery and ridicule. It’s truth with the sting gentled by a guffaw. And when it’s well done, it can be damned insightful. Some people won’t ever see past the sting. That’s their loss, IMO, because anybody who can’t/won’t accept that they’re perfectly ridiculous once in a while sets him/herself above being human. Some ‘jokes’ are just assaults under the guise of humor, but it’s impossible to de-fang _everything_. The offenderati game can get very old, and it doesn’t matter who’s playing it or for what reason. If it’s not funny to one person, fine. They don’t have to laugh. But they don’t get to project their finely tuned sensitivities as a standard for everybody else. Veb ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/77 "2005-04-28T01:58:12Z")
> [@TVeblen](#): > > Humor’s subjective as hell, mostly because some of it is rooted in ribbing, mockery and ridicule. It’s truth with the sting gentled by a guffaw. See, I know this. I LOVE comedy. As you know, for the amount I’m always quoting it. The thing was, for me, that there didn’t seem to _be_ that much truth in the underlying assumptions in those threads. They were presenting, via humour, a view I believe to be false and unhelpful. The humour is not the issue. ---
**Author:** ![Elysian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@Elysian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysian)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/78 "2005-04-28T02:10:36Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Now, why couldn’t you have brought that attitude in the _joke_ thread? 😛 > > I’m glad to see you got the point! 😃 Eh, I was tempted to leave the thread alone at first, but then I noticed that _some_ of it wasn’t a lighthearted or a sting-with-a-guffaw. Some of it seemed angry and accusatory and bitter, and I just wanted to remind everyone that hey, not all women are bitches. And what a response I got! Wow. But that was my intent; to be a separate target. So I succeeded, and I count it as a win 😃 It’s to be expected, though. Men (here _I’m_ generalizing!) do have a sore spot when they are accused of being even mildly sexist and tend to overreact. So there I was, hitting their sore spot after they’d hit mine, and it just escalated from there. No big deal though! I just wish they hadn’t gotten their hackles all a-raised before considering the issue and being rational about it. Funnily enough, I’m not easily offended. I’m very laid-back, most people have never seen me upset/angry/excited. So being accused of being easily offended just makes me laugh! Come on guys, can’t you do better than that! You probably didn’t want this detailed of a response 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lightingtool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/57b2e6/32.png) [@lightingtool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lightingtool)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/79 "2005-04-28T03:09:18Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > This is exactly what worries me: a tendency I’ve noted to blame the failings of one’s SO on the entire other gender. I don’t understand it and I think it’s disturbing. Well, I see your point, but I don’t think there is a _real_ sense of gender-blame there. In this instance, it seems like just a way to deal with some strong emotional stuff. Different people cope in different ways. I guess we will just have to disagree on this one. By the way, **matt\_mcl** ’s long post above makes it seem like I said all the things he responded to. I only said the first quote. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2005, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308/80 "2005-04-28T03:19:29Z")
GAH. Sorry. I did this before, didn’t I? A thousand lashes with a wet noodle. (I’m still not quite used to the system where it automatically lists the person on whose post you clicked “reply to w/quote”.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-nearly-everything-have-to-be-qualified-nowadays/301308.md?page=5)