# Does the backstory affect how you feel about a song? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** music\ **Created:** [June 22, 2021, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849 "2021-06-22T17:53:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2021, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/41 "2021-06-28T14:42:01Z")
I assumed, in context, that “estate” in the song means a large patch of land. It would be weird to create an alternate, better, version of your sister’s life and have her on the public dole. Also, it’s “lives ON an estate” versus “lives IN an estate” which would seem more fitting syntax for living in government project housing. For the OP, I know the song’s background but figure that if it was written as a celebration of her memory then I can treat it as such rather than finding it depressing. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanubv.2/32/3260_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUBv.2)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2021, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/42 "2021-06-28T15:17:38Z")
Sorry to add to the little hijack we’ve got going here, but until this thread I didn’t know the backstory to _Come Dancing_, so yes, now that I know the backstory, it will forever change how I feel about it. I still adore it but now there is bitter sweetness there. Also, though I have understood the meaning of “estate” in the British sense, I never got that part because I thought he was saying “out of the state” 🤦‍♀️ ---
**Author:** ![peccavi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peccavi/32/388_2.png) [@peccavi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peccavi)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2021, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/43 "2021-06-28T20:47:14Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](#): > > Also, though I have understood the meaning of “estate” in the British sense, I never got that part because I thought he was saying “out of the state” No the “out of state” thought is for that up tempo, peppy John Prine song, _[Hello in There](https://youtu.be/5-zYNPdT1a4)_ > Well, it’d been years since the kids had grown > A life of their own, left us alone > John and Linda live in Omaha > And Joe is somewhere on the road > We lost Davy in the Korean war > And I still don’t know what for, don’t matter anymore ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2021, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/44 "2021-06-28T23:15:37Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > I assumed, in context, that “estate” in the song means a large patch of land. It would be weird to create an alternate, better, version of your sister’s life and have her on the public dole. Also, it’s “lives ON an estate” versus “lives IN an estate” which would seem more fitting syntax for living in government project housing. > > For the OP, I know the song’s background but figure that if it was written as a celebration of her memory then I can treat it as such rather than finding it depressing. It’s always lives on a council estate, not in. And the people there aren’t living on the public dole; some of them probably are, but it’s got nothing directly to do with where they live. Some are rough, many aren’t. I lived on an estate until five years ago. But in the song I’m really not sure. It is somewhat a better version of her life, in that she’s still alive and her kids are old enough to be going out on their own, but the Palais is still replaced by a car park, so it’s not a rosy, perfect, alternate reality. Really either interpretation - posh estate or council estate - is justifiable, ISTM. If Miss Boods is still around here now and then, she’d know what they intended, if anyone does. ---
**Author:** ![snoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@snoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snoe)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/45 "2021-06-29T01:43:19Z")
> [@SciFiSam](#): > > But in the song I’m really not sure. It is somewhat a better version of her life, in that she’s still alive and her kids are old enough to be going out on their own, but the Palais is still replaced by a car park, so it’s not a rosy, perfect, alternate reality. Really either interpretation - posh estate or council estate - is justifiable, ISTM. Yes, after learning the backstory I assumed that Ray asking her to come dancing at the end was to cheer her up from a ho-hum (not necessarily squalid) life. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/46 "2021-06-29T01:57:24Z")
> [@snoe](#): > > Yes, after learning the backstory I assumed that Ray asking her to come dancing at the end was to cheer her up from a ho-hum (not necessarily squalid) life. Yeah. A lot of the residents of the early post-war council estates were very happy to be there. They were better than the Victorian buildings they’d been living in. The Victorian buildings that escaped the changes are actually fine with some changes (expensive, but then so is knocking down and replacing buildings), but they do tend to have slightly less square footage. It’s kinda difficult to explain council estates to middle-class English people, let alone Americans. There are a few that are notorious hellholes (in London the worst is Thamesmead, which scares me despite an Aunt and my Grandma living on it; it’s got better but that’s better from a very low bar), but a lot of them are really pretty nice and you only know they’re council estates because of the uniform front doors. Davies grew up in an area where the council estates are more like the latter than the former. It could still be an estate as is a posh “estate” though, in the song. It’d be a huge change in income, but, hey, that happens, especially in dreams. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/47 "2021-06-29T02:05:07Z")
I think the interpretation could go either way, but I sort of hope that since he was able to imagine whatever future he wanted for her, he would’ve gone with wealthy housewife rather than welfare mom. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/48 "2021-06-29T02:09:02Z")
Council estate does not mean welfare mom. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/49 "2021-06-29T02:14:49Z")
Leaving aside the question of what an “estate” is, the kind of backstory that gets to me is a love song written for a real-life relationship that has since ended. There are an awful lot of them. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/50 "2021-06-29T05:59:15Z")
Humm. Seems the video for _Come Dancing_ does a real disservice to the spirit of the song, now knowing the backstory. **The Kinks** are kinda complex, however. But, Hey. Gotta sell records. ---
**Author:** ![BlankSlate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blankslate/32/80_2.png) [@BlankSlate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlankSlate)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/51 "2021-06-29T11:06:02Z")
This song has layer upon layer. I lived in the UK when it came out, and their were two popular jokes making the rounds: Q: What’s white and shoots across the sky? A: The coming of the lord. Q: What’s white and shoots across the floor A : Come dancing Anyway, I mean, c’mon! Come dancing? _Come dancing That’s how they did it when I was just a kid And when they said “come dancing” My sister always did_ Even though I lived there, I had never seen _Come Dancing_ on TV. (It was on for fifty years or so.) I thought the singer was pretty much calling his sister a ho who was into dirty dancing. Now that I know the backstory, I feel terrible (not really) about misunderstanding it so badly. ---
**Author:** ![girlbossmj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/71c47a/32.png) [@girlbossmj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/girlbossmj)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/52 "2021-06-29T11:37:25Z")
For me, the backstory does not affect how I listen to a song but I do acknowledge that I can have a better grasp of how that song came to be once you understood the backstory, ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/53 "2021-06-29T13:37:37Z")
> [@XOldiesJock](#): > > The Rolling Stones’ “Gimme Shelter” has long been a favorite of mine, to no small degree because of the solo by Merry Clayton. She was pregnant at the time. Legend has it that the session was so grueling that when she returned home in the middle of the night, exhausted, she had a miscarriage. She’s said she was unable to even listen to the song for many years. That story has ever since tainted the song for me. I agree with others that the miscarriage was correlated if not caused. Tragic either way. The isolated vocal for that song is stunning. Give it a listen: [isolated vocal track](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njAuEGRthuw) The [back story](https://faroutmagazine.co.uk/rolling-stones-gimme-shelter-merry-clayton-story-miscarriage/) is worth a read. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2021, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849/54 "2021-06-29T15:47:30Z")
> [@minor7flat5](#): > > The isolated vocal for that song is stunning. Give it a listen: I wish I hadn’t done that. Not nearly as good as I once thought it was. ☹ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-backstory-affect-how-you-feel-about-a-song/944849.md?page=2)