# Does the longer candidate win? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 24, 2000, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078 "2000-10-24T04:15:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2000, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/1 "2000-10-24T04:15:10Z")
My girlfriend turned on one of the morning news/gosssip shows today (TV Asahi (Tokyo), I think). As I was sitting on the couch with my coffee, a headline came up on the screen which I translated as follows: Candidate Gore: Is he real “down there”? Me: That can’t mean what I think it means. Cut to: Cover of US edition of Rolling Stone, with a full-length photo of Gore in casual clothes. Cut to: Close-up of Gore’s crotch, with attention drawn to a noticible penis-shaped bulge down one leg. Cut to: Shot of the news studio. The Vice-Presidential wang is still filling the studio’s two-meter tall wall monitor. One of the reporters is standing beside the monitor, talking into a camera, and repeatedly whacking his pointer against Gore’s schlong. This went on for about five minutes, after which I washed my eyes and went to work. So, have there been any surveys of Presidential penis size (besides our most recent Commander in Chief)? Would it affect your decision on Election Day? Will we start seeing a new debating style (“Mr. Lieberman, your rebuttal?” zzzzzzzip… _thump_) Well, my boss is calling. Gotta go. –sublight. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2000, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/2 "2000-10-24T07:40:06Z")
Does this mean Cheney wins by default? I mean the guy’s what, 6 feet tall? ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2000, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/3 "2000-10-24T16:15:09Z")
The debate is obstensivly about whether that picture, which was the cover of the Rolling Stone, was airbrushed. Rolling Stone said they had to airbrush it to make it look smaller. Rush Limbaugh and others seem to think it was airbrushed to make it look bigger. So yeah, I guess it is about penis size - Roling Stones’ endorsement of Gore being “it was so big, we had to airbrush just to fit it on the page.” Bush will have to find a way to bring his up (so to speak) before election day or he could be in trouble. Japan must think we’re out of our minds. BTW Love the sound effects. KKBattousai, height can be very misleading. Believe me. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2000, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/4 "2000-10-24T17:23:37Z")
I know but he’s [sub]wait for it, wait for it[/sub], all Dick! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Myron\_Van\_Horowitzski](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Myron\_Van\_Horowitzski](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myron_Van_Horowitzski)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2000, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/5 "2000-10-24T18:06:45Z")
I actually clicked on this topic so I could post “Hee hee…I thought this was gonna be about the size of the presidential packages!” Whaddaya know. ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/6 "2000-10-25T06:20:52Z")
[Danny Husk] That’s it. Unfurl it boy. C’mon it’s not a flag, let it touch the ground. [/Danny Husk} ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-longer-candidate-win/38078/7 "2000-10-25T17:50:07Z")
Well, I guess Lieberman is gonna show us just how Jewish he is… 😉