# Does the man or woman cook more in your relationship? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 22, 2016, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865 "2016-01-22T06:16:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/61 "2016-01-23T16:26:18Z")
When we got married, I could cook a few things and my wife could not cook at all. I did most of the cooking. But after the kids came along, she became a SAHM and started to do most of the cooking. After nearly 52 years, she is a superb cook who loves to try different things. I have learned a few more things and do a bit of the cooking, but she does more than 90% of it, although I do have a few specialties. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/62 "2016-01-23T18:02:06Z")
I have always done 99.999% of the cooking. My husband hates the very idea of food preparation. In recent years he has on occasion put cold cuts on bread and bragged, “I made myself a sandwich!” More likely if he’s hungry and I’m not home he’ll go out and get something. But that’s all good. I like to cook, and I hate yard work. He does 99.999% of yard work and vehicle maintenance. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/63 "2016-01-23T19:06:21Z")
Can’t answer the poll, as we alternate cooking duties. I’m a little better at finding & experimenting with new recipes, but he’s better at meal planning and using food before it spoils. It’s a wash! ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/64 "2016-01-23T19:22:49Z")
My wife is the better cook by far and does more of the cooking as in fact all I do is grill. I do grill a lot, I was grilling only a week ago but now that we are getting snowed in the grilling is done for a while. ---
**Author:** ![Renee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/renee/32/287_2.png) [@Renee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renee)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/65 "2016-01-23T19:48:35Z")
I love to cook. It’s fun and art for me. I do 99% of the cooking and shopping, and I’m good at it. I very rarely make the same dish twice, and cook about 95% of our meals from scratch (we occasionally go out to eat, but never eat processed foods at home.) My husband might have learned to cook, but we got married young and I claimed the kitchen. I barely let him make coffee. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2016, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/66 "2016-01-23T20:11:17Z")
My husband cooks more, but I have more range and a defter hand with technique and seasonings, so we both agree I’m the “better” cook\*. He, however, has more time to cook, and he’s a perfectly decent cook, so we’re happy. I tend to cook large multibatch things on the weekend - pasta sauce for four meals, or chili, or a huge pot of soup - and then freeze them for future quick meals. He tends to cook most weeknights, pulling out something frozen when he doesn’t feel like it. So it’s not uncommon for him to reheat my cooking and then get all the compliments and thanks for dinner. 😃 (To his credit, he always redirects the compliments in my direction, though.) \*Except for steaks and hash browns. I’m hopeless at those, he rocks at those. Perfect marriage. ---
**Author:** ![T.M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ad7895/32.png) [@T.M](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T.M)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/67 "2016-01-24T02:05:43Z")
I cook and shop my wife cleans and washes and we share the gardening ---
**Author:** ![Drummond\_Bays](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8edcca/32.png) [@Drummond\_Bays](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drummond_Bays)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/68 "2016-01-24T05:18:00Z")
Male, I do about 80-90% of the cooking. Mrs. Bays can certainly cook, but only the things she really likes. She does traditional Filipino food very well and cooks divine breakfasts, anything else though she will tend to rush, lose interest, or make things in such a rudimentary fashion it’s almost not worth it. She often confesses to only loving eating, and loathing the cooking itself. I love cooking myself, and am starting to get pretty good at it- I ask her to tell me what she wants that I don’t normally cook about once a week, and will try my damndest to do my best rendition after reading several recipies. I’d give myself about a 70% success rate! 🆒 Over the years we have switched from “boxed food” to about 75% fresh, scratch-made. \*Don’t get me wrong, we get a lot of boxed/bagged food simply because it’s GOOD :o but we are guilty of eating a lot of it too quickly. No more things like pizza pockets in this house! We normally shop together for staples, sundries, and costco-type bulk stuff once every week or two. I like to hit up the market alone every other day or so for fresh ingredients and whatever else. Great thread! ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/69 "2016-01-24T07:39:22Z")
From my observation it tends to be men. Why? Men just like to eat more and have fewer hangups. Look at restaurants. When a bunch of guys eat out we eat greasy, spicy foods and love our plates to be heaping high. Deserts are no problems. We love to shovel it in. Now when a group of women eat out its total opposite. They only eat low calorie, low fat options or else they spend all the time apologizing for eating to much. They constantly worry about how they look with their friends. In mixed company it moderates. The men tend to tone it down and the women lighten up more. Now getting back to cooking if you insist on everything you eat being “healthy” you really limit your options. Few fried or fatty foods. I have a SIL who is a health nut and almost everything she eats is out of a blender and its her husband who makes the tasty food in the house. Other than that it usually comes down to time. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Mondegreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/91b2a8/32.png) [@Lord\_Mondegreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Mondegreen)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/70 "2016-01-24T10:23:26Z")
I didn’t vote, because of the mismatch between the thread title and the poll question. I (male) do almost all of the cooking in our house because my wife works most evenings. I would never, however, claim to be a better cook than she is. I’m sure my kids would agree, but are way too polite to say so. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/71 "2016-01-24T15:30:47Z")
Male here and I do almost all the cooking and most of the grocery shopping. I’m the more experienced cook, and I really enjoy cooking most of the time. It’s a usually creative and relaxing part of the day, so I end up doing it 95% of the time. I think my wife has cooked dinner maybe three or four times in the four years we’ve been married, but every time she has cooked, the meal was good, so she’s not a bad cook–I just don’t think icooking and food interests her anywhere as much. The 5% is mainly breakfast. My previous live-in relationship was similar. I grew up in a family where both parents cooked regularly, so I never really developed assigned gender roles for that. My mom would usually cook the homemade Polish meals she and my dad grew up with, but my dad would do stuff like chili, jambalaya, steaks, biscuits and gravy, clam chowder, tortilla soup, that sort of think. He was an avid watcher of The Frugal Gourmet and would constantly try recipes from there. Mom would do all the baking, though. I know of very few men who simply don’t/can’t cook or rarely cook in my generation (I’m 40.) The split in the poll here is near about what I would expect. ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/72 "2016-01-24T17:52:29Z")
Not even close. I am, arguably, the best cook in all my immediate family. Only my brother-in-law compares - no one else is even close. I like to cook. My wife hates cooking. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/73 "2016-01-24T17:55:53Z")
My husband doesn’t like to cook, doesn’t want to learn, and is pretty much not allowed to touch any of my kitchen stuff! 😃 But it works out fine, because I don’t mind cooking, but I hate cleaning up, and he doesn’t mind doing the dishes after. ---
**Author:** ![seal\_cleaner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@seal\_cleaner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seal_cleaner)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/74 "2016-01-24T17:59:30Z")
Since the nest emptied, we both “cook” for ourselves. Frozen dinners and the like. Funny, we are both good cooks, but rarely interested in getting out the pots and pans and spending the time. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2016, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865/75 "2016-01-24T18:25:41Z")
I cook shop and clean more than he, he can shop cook and clean but doesn’t make a habit of it and seems to expect praise for it.:rolleyes: My scratch cooking beats his any day of the week. Warsn’t so when we first married, thus we ate out a lot. I have no hold on my kitchen, it’s a room i freely share with all who care. I confess I tend to leave the dishes undone, sometimes the cook just has to call it a day. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-the-man-or-woman-cook-more-in-your-relationship/743865.md?page=3)