# Does unconditional love really exist? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 11, 2011, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333 "2011-03-11T21:50:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/141 "2013-06-09T15:59:36Z")
> [@panaccione](#): > > What if the child murders every single person in his mothers life. What if he robs her blind and leaves her crippled. Then, will she still have unconditional love for him? > > I think your failing to recognize reality and that no one is strong enough to exhibit the behavior you are talking about. People have limits. Love is as much of a joyful emotion as it is a responsibility. There are certain agreements that need to be upheld for it to function. Some are strong enough to exhibit love to those who have hurt or even murdered them. Jesus was such a person. But you miss the point of such love, it is the love that frees the one who gives. It does nothing for the one that takes. ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/142 "2013-06-09T16:00:58Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Just more unsubstantiated “NDE” nonsense-totally dismissible. Only to those that miss the point of it. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/143 "2013-06-09T16:06:10Z")
Yes it exists. Usually it’s more likely for deeply spiritual people than romantic situations. Loving someone in a compassionate sense is different than being in love with them. Being unconditionally loving doesn’t mean you like all the choices the person makes, or that you will let the person take advantage of you, it just means you understand that on a fundamental level they have the same inherent worth that you do as a human. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/144 "2013-06-09T16:10:53Z")
> [@donnie\_darko](#): > > Isn’t it possible to love someone without accepting or approving of what they do? Absolutely. ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/145 "2013-06-09T16:22:32Z")
> [@jackdavinci](#): > > Yes it exists. Usually it’s more likely for deeply spiritual people than romantic situations. Loving someone in a compassionate sense is different than being in love with them. Being unconditionally loving doesn’t mean you like all the choices the person makes, or that you will let the person take advantage of you, it just means you understand that on a fundamental level they have the same inherent worth that you do as a human. I like your post and agree with it, ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/146 "2013-06-09T18:17:18Z")
> [@lekatt](#): > > Some are strong enough to exhibit love to those who have hurt or even murdered them. Jesus was such a person. But you miss the point of such love, it is the love that frees the one who gives. It does nothing for the one that takes. :dubious: Yeah, I don’t even know what to say to that. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/147 "2013-06-09T18:52:46Z")
> [@panaccione](#): > > :dubious: > > Yeah, I don’t even know what to say to that. I guess it depends on whether you see others as fundamentally different, or fundamentally the same. And whether you see bad actions as a sign that someone needs to be punished, or a sign that they are already deeply hurt, that is why they are acting badly, and what they need is to be helped. Or that they have some great flaw in their understanding, and what they need is to be taught. ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/148 "2013-06-09T20:00:26Z")
> [@panaccione](#): > > :dubious: > > Yeah, I don’t even know what to say to that. You are on the right path if you don’t know and that is OK. The next step is too find out. There are others that will help you. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/149 "2013-06-09T20:17:32Z")
> [@lekatt](#): > > You are on the right path if you don’t know and that is OK. The next step is too find out. There are others that will help you. How do you know this? Do you know who these “others” are? How do they know who **panaccione** is or that he needs their help? Do they glow or something so that he can spot them among the false “others” that might not be part of your “One True Way”? ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/150 "2013-06-09T20:28:19Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > How do you know this? Do you know who these “others” are? How do they know who **panaccione** is or that he needs their help? Do they glow or something so that he can spot them among the false “others” that might not be part of your “One True Way”? You are making a lot of assumptions not in evidence of my post. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/151 "2013-06-09T20:34:31Z")
> [@lekatt](#): > > You are making a lot of assumptions not in evidence of my post. The only assumption here is yours in thinking saying vague supposedly comforting things is going to go over in this forum. How can you possibly know that some mysterious “other” is going to come along and steer him in the “right”(read “your”) direction, and why should _anyone_ assume that you know what you are talking about, especially considering what you’ve told us in the past about how you acquire your otherworldly information? ---
**Author:** ![Lanzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/74df32/32.png) [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/152 "2013-06-09T20:52:42Z")
Came here late and skimmed over the comments. Unconditionally is the only way I know how to love. ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2013, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/153 "2013-06-09T21:01:20Z")
> [@Lanzy](#): > > Came here late and skimmed over the comments. > Unconditionally is the only way I know how to love. Great, then you are a helper. ---
**Author:** ![Moon\_Meyers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Moon\_Meyers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moon_Meyers)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2013, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/154 "2013-06-11T18:57:20Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > No prob-it was getting a bit sticky anyway.Besides death? Not that I know of. What about insight? intuition? ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2013, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/155 "2013-06-11T19:07:45Z")
> [@Moon\_Meyers](#): > > What about insight? intuition? What in the name of Gholgosht the Unwashed are “unconditional insight” and/or “unconditional intuition”?? ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2013, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/156 "2013-06-11T20:38:47Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > What in the name of Gholgosht the Unwashed are “unconditional insight” and/or “unconditional intuition”?? You made me laugh, now I want to know that also. ---
**Author:** ![Moon\_Meyers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Moon\_Meyers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moon_Meyers)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2013, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/157 "2013-06-12T12:44:19Z")
> [@lekatt](#): > > You made me laugh, now I want to know that also. Obviously, no **Aha!** moment for you.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2013, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/158 "2013-06-12T13:01:55Z")
> [@Moon\_Meyers](#): > > Obviously, no **Aha!** moment for you.😃 Obviously, you are throwing random words into the mix as a stall tactic. Please answer the question I asked. ---
**Author:** ![Moon\_Meyers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Moon\_Meyers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moon_Meyers)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/159 "2013-06-14T01:29:44Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Obviously, you are throwing random words into the mix as a stall tactic. > Please answer the question I asked. Those questions were rhetorical in nature. (from wiki: In simple terms, it is a question asked more to produce an effect than to summon an answer.) The effect I attempted to elicit was one of cooperation and a point of departure in finding an agreed upon unconditional experience. ---
**Author:** ![lekatt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lekatt/32/7269_2.png) [@lekatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lekatt)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2013, 10:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333/160 "2013-06-14T10:43:42Z")
> [@Moon\_Meyers](#): > > Those questions were rhetorical in nature. (from wiki: In simple terms, it is a question asked more to produce an effect than to summon an answer.) The effect I attempted to elicit was one of cooperation and a point of departure in finding an agreed upon unconditional experience. The unconditional love experience is real and not theoretical. It happens to people when they least expect it. They remember it forever. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/does-unconditional-love-really-exist/574333.md?page=9)