# dog poop on car- illegal? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 17, 2016, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319 "2016-02-17T06:23:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/21 "2016-02-18T00:55:05Z")
My answer to people parking like this - if there’s legitimately no other place to park - is to assess whether there’s enough space even with an inch of room for my car. If there is, I’ll still park there and do either head-in or back-in so I can still get out, but they can’t use their driver’s door. Heck, I’ve done it so I still had to go out the passenger side. Just to prove a point. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/22 "2016-02-18T01:29:45Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > My answer to people parking like this - if there’s legitimately no other place to park - is to assess whether there’s enough space even with an inch of room for my car. If there is, I’ll still park there and do either head-in or back-in so I can still get out, but they can’t use their driver’s door. Heck, I’ve done it so I still had to go out the passenger side. Just to prove a point. Mebbe you should just get a [convertible](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-WqjpNIH9E) ---
**Author:** ![goghingwilde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9fc29f/32.png) [@goghingwilde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goghingwilde)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/23 "2016-02-18T03:18:19Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > My answer to people parking like this - if there’s legitimately no other place to park - is to assess whether there’s enough space even with an inch of room for my car. If there is, I’ll still park there and do either head-in or back-in so I can still get out, but they can’t use their driver’s door. Heck, I’ve done it so I still had to go out the passenger side. Just to prove a point. He backs in, so normally leaves a lot of space for himself on the driver side. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Whatever4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@Whatever4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whatever4)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/24 "2016-02-18T05:39:40Z")
Could you try a Rosemary Woods-type defense? That is, your dog had his hind feet on the truck’s running board when the burrito he’d eaten earlier forcefully exited his body and scored a direct hit? ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Wayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4bbf92/32.png) [@Charlie\_Wayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Wayne)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/25 "2016-02-18T12:16:00Z")
> [@goghingwilde](#): > > So… There’s this jerk who parks his overly large truck out of the lines all the time at my apartment complex. When I get home late, most of the time he’s blocking my spot by parking way out of the lines into it. > > I lost my temper tonight, and when I went by with my dog’s poop bag- I just smeared a big ol turd on his driverside handle… > > Can I get in trouble for this legally? I never do shit like this (pun… intended? You don’t know!) so I’m paranoid about it. I doubt anyone saw me (it was almost midnight and no one was around)- but my dog is recognizable if they did. > > I’m moving soon, so I don’t really care if I get in trouble with the complex. > More concerned if there is any way this could affect me legally. (Criminal mischief?) 😕 > > I’m sorry for the juvenile post. I certainly wouldn’t recommend admitting to it on the Internet. But if you want to know just how much danger you could be in, here is a technique that I have used several times and it has always worked very well for me. Call the police (the non-emergency number) from a pay phone or other phone that cannot be traced back to you. Pretend you are the victim of this incident. But change the facts to a different location and different kind of car. To be best prepared, you might want to write down the license number and description of some car that you see parked a few miles away from the spot of the real incident. Complain to the police that someone did this to your car and tell them you have an inkling of who it may be and then ask them just what they can do to help you. The answer you get will give you a good idea of just how much potential trouble you could be in. If they say that without solid proof, there is nothing they can do to help you, you can feel relieved and say that someone needs you right away and hang up and be happy. If they say that they will be right over and they can prosecute this person, you might want to ask them some other questions to help you avoid getting arrested. Like you might ask them what they need from you to help them arrest this person. Then make sure you can avoid letting them get their hands on any such thing. In the past, I have found this kind of role reversal to be most helpful when trying to avoid getting arrested. Good Luck. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/26 "2016-02-18T12:56:30Z")
> [@Charlie\_Wayne](#): > > I have found this kind of role reversal to be most helpful when trying to avoid getting arrested. You’ve never done time, have you. ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Wayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4bbf92/32.png) [@Charlie\_Wayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Wayne)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/27 "2016-02-18T16:05:20Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > You’ve never done time, have you. No. But it was a terrible mistake for me to have made that post. I wish to retract that if I can. It was a stupid thing to suggest. I’m sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/28 "2016-02-18T16:59:20Z")
> [@Charlie\_Wayne](#): > > I certainly wouldn’t recommend admitting to it on the Internet. > > But if you want to know just how much danger you could be in, here is a technique that I have used several times and it has always worked very well for me. > > Call the police (the non-emergency number) from a pay phone or other phone that cannot be traced back to you. > > Pretend you are the victim of this incident. But change the facts to a different location and different kind of car. To be best prepared, you might want to write down the license number and description of some car that you see parked a few miles away from the spot of the real incident. > > Complain to the police that someone did this to your car and tell them you have an inkling of who it may be and then ask them just what they can do to help you. > > The answer you get will give you a good idea of just how much potential trouble you could be in. > > If they say that without solid proof, there is nothing they can do to help you, you can feel relieved and say that someone needs you right away and hang up and be happy. > > If they say that they will be right over and they can prosecute this person, you might want to ask them some other questions to help you avoid getting arrested. > > Like you might ask them what they need from you to help them arrest this person. Then make sure you can avoid letting them get their hands on any such thing. > > In the past, I have found this kind of role reversal to be most helpful when trying to avoid getting arrested. > > Good Luck. So you are constantly calling the cops wasting their time with your lies after you broke the law? What are some of these laws you have broken? ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/29 "2016-02-19T20:40:46Z")
> [@Charlie\_Wayne](#): > > I certainly wouldn’t recommend admitting to it on the Internet. > > But if you want to know just how much danger you could be in, here is a technique that I have used several times and it has always worked very well for me. > > Call the police (the non-emergency number) from a pay phone or other phone that cannot be traced back to you. > > Pretend you are the victim of this incident. But change the facts to a different location and different kind of car. To be best prepared, you might want to write down the license number and description of some car that you see parked a few miles away from the spot of the real incident. > > Complain to the police that someone did this to your car and tell them you have an inkling of who it may be and then ask them just what they can do to help you. > > The answer you get will give you a good idea of just how much potential trouble you could be in. > > If they say that without solid proof, there is nothing they can do to help you, you can feel relieved and say that someone needs you right away and hang up and be happy. > > If they say that they will be right over and they can prosecute this person, you might want to ask them some other questions to help you avoid getting arrested. > > Like you might ask them what they need from you to help them arrest this person. Then make sure you can avoid letting them get their hands on any such thing. > > In the past, I have found this kind of role reversal to be most helpful when trying to avoid getting arrested. > > Good Luck. This has to be some of the dumbest advice I have ever seen given. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/30 "2016-02-19T21:15:48Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > I’m imagining a scenario where he had a huge blow up fight with his girlfriend (now ex) two days ago. He encounters your stunt, assumes it is her, becomes enraged and does something much more terrible. This is what would happen in a movie. Well, in an Alexander Payne movie, anyway, which would end up with the o.p. character running through an alligator pen wearing only flip-flops and being pursued by a roadhouse bouncer while carrying a bowling trophy in the mistaken belief that it had previously been stolen from his dead uncle’s house. Actually, now I want to see this movie. Are Paul Giamatti and Bob Odenkirk available? > [@Omar\_Little](#): > > This has to be some of the dumbest advice I have ever seen given. Eh, it’s about on par with the advice you’ll get here on any random topic from one of any number of the village idiots. Check out some of the advice in the “How do I tell if he/she likes me?” themed threads if you really want to see some spectacularly obtuse guidance. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![edwardcoast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cab0a1/32.png) [@edwardcoast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwardcoast)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319/31 "2016-02-21T12:30:57Z")
> [@goghingwilde](#): > > So… There’s this jerk who parks his overly large truck out of the lines all the time at my apartment complex. When I get home late, most of the time he’s blocking my spot by parking way out of the lines into it. > > I lost my temper tonight, and when I went by with my dog’s poop bag- I just smeared a big ol turd on his driverside handle… > > Can I get in trouble for this legally? I never do shit like this (pun… intended? You don’t know!) so I’m paranoid about it. I doubt anyone saw me (it was almost midnight and no one was around)- but my dog is recognizable if they did. > > I’m moving soon, so I don’t really care if I get in trouble with the complex. > More concerned if there is any way this could affect me legally. (Criminal mischief?) 😕 > > I’m sorry for the juvenile post. Why didn’t you just complain to the landlord with the license plate number? Or perhaps call the police if it is illegally parked? I lived in an apartment complex where some idiot in a sports car use to park it sideways taking up the remaining spaces. I complained to the landlord and they put a stop to it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dog-poop-on-car-illegal/746319.md?page=1)