# Dogs are superior to cats.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [February 24, 2010, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200 "2010-02-24T00:09:30Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/41 "2010-02-24T17:40:26Z")

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> [@Daylate](#):
>
> My only comment is that while I’ve known a lot of idiot dogs, I’ve never known an idiot cat.

Oh, I have. One of the best things about breaking up with my ex boyfriend was I no longer had to live with that moronic cat. The cat was stupid _and_ an asshole. No redeeming qualities.

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**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/42 "2010-02-24T17:49:45Z")

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> [@Daylate](#):
>
> Let me say right up front that for the first 65 years of my life I had only dogs. then for some reason stray cats started moving in, and we now have only cats. My only comment is that while I’ve known a lot of idiot dogs, I’ve never known an idiot cat.
> 
> My neighbor has two pugs, which, as near as it is possible to tell, are only good for barking madly at anything or everything. Pugs - the most useless animal in creation!

Funny, I have an idiot cat, as well as a pug.

My idiot cat, if the puppy is pulling on his ears and tail, just sits there and mews. “Ow, that hurts! Ow, that hurts! Ow, won’t you stop! Ow, if only I could do something!” (Keep in mind he is twice the dog’s size and can easily hold him down - he does this regularly during playtime.) He doesn’t run away unless he’s frisky and enjoying the chase. 😕 He just sits there and takes it, mewling all the while. I usually intervene and put him up on a chair or something.

I tried to train him with a squirt bottle, but the same thing happens. I squirt him with the bottle, he just sits there and takes it, looking really confused and agitated-looking. It takes like ten squirts, me saying “No!” all the while, before he goes “Oh, I’m supposed to stay out of the kitchen sink?” or even “I will run away now”.

On the coldest days, he decides he’s going to make an escape attempt. The ice must be cold on his paws because he gets about 5 feet out of the door, and then stands there and meows in discomfort. I have to pick him back up to bring him inside because he can’t figure out that he could turn around and walk back through the door where I am beckoning to him.

Also, he really likes the dog’s food, but he knows he’s not supposed to have it, so he… sits right next to me while I’m putting the dog’s food in the bowl, so I can then easily pick him up and put him in the basement prior to feeding the dog. :smack: We do this twice a day.

My cat is dumb. Really dumb.

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**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/43 "2010-02-24T17:50:27Z")

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I have several cats and one dog. The dog is a 60 pound mix with some pit in her. She could kill a cat if she were so inclined, however the cats are superior to her. One has chased her numerous times when the dog pissed off the cat (just by being in the way). Some of the cats have decided at one time or another that they would prefer to sleep on the dog’s bed leaving the dog to sleep on the cold floor or the very edge of the blanket if they allow it. The cat that really hates her (the one that chases her) will pee on the dog’s bed to express her hatred and the dog will sleep on it anyway.

And one more item of proof that cats are superior; cats don’t eat dog shit.

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**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/44 "2010-02-24T17:52:17Z")

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The best dogs are better (smarter, more talented, more impressive, more useful to have around) than the best cats. The worst dogs are worse (more annoying, more trouble, more dangerous, more stoopid) than the worst cats.

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/45 "2010-02-24T17:54:11Z")

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Dogs stink.

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**Author:** ![Rex\_Goliath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bcef8e/32.png) [@Rex\_Goliath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rex_Goliath)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/46 "2010-02-24T18:23:03Z")

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> [@fluiddruid](#):
>
> Funny, I have an idiot cat,  
> … I usually intervene and put him up on a chair or something… I have to pick him back up to bring him inside… I can then easily pick him up and put him in the basement prior to feeding the dog.

Doesn’t sound too dumb if you ask me.

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**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/47 "2010-02-24T19:12:32Z")

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> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#):
>
> Big plus: cats are self-cleaning. Their saliva even has anti-bacterial properties.

Dog saliva \*also \*has anti-bacterial properties. What’s more, they’re willing to \*share \*it with you, unlike cats. The greedy bastards.

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**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/48 "2010-02-24T19:19:24Z")

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> [@Daylate](#):
>
> My only comment is that while I’ve known a lot of idiot dogs, I’ve never known an idiot cat.

You’ve not known enough cats, then. We had one who forgot her way around the three-room shotgun apartment after we left her with the in-laws for a few weeks and thought she could effectively hide behind a chair leg 1/5 her width. We’ve got one right now that continually shuts himself into closets, bathrooms, the pantry and the basement. He pushes the door open, then it swings closed and he attempts to push it back open but succeeds only in latching it closed. And then he sits and cries until someone comes along to let him out. Five minutes later, he’s trying to open the door again. Dumb.

Both terribly sweet cats, but dumb as bricks.

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/49 "2010-02-24T19:25:35Z")

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> [@Lightnin](#):
>
> Dog saliva \*also \*has anti-bacterial properties. What’s more, they’re willing to \*share \*it with you, unlike cats. The greedy bastards.

My cat licks me all the time. Plus, her little sandpaper tongue is exfoliating. 🆒

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/50 "2010-02-24T19:25:47Z")

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> [@Munch](#):
>
> No, they want to be with _your lap_.

Hmm, not going to argue too vigourously with that. 🙂

So, how well do your dogs train their humans? My cats have us both trained to perfection - my cat just waves her paw in the general direction of any door she wants opened and we open it for her.

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**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/51 "2010-02-24T19:39:08Z")

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> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#):
>
> So, how well do your dogs train their humans? My cats have us both trained to perfection - my cat just waves her paw in the general direction of any door she wants opened and we open it for her.

See, here’s the issue. This thread is about dogs being (or not being) superior to cats. It isn’t about cat people being inferior to cats.

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**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/52 "2010-02-24T19:48:05Z")

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As a Sox fan, I find it entirely appropriate that the OP’s handle is what it is.

🆒  
I once had the same discussion with a lady I worked with at the time. In the midst of the discussion, I dropped a pencil on the floor near her. Without thinking, she did what most people (and I guess dogs) would do, which was to pick it up and hand it to me. I thanked her and promptly dropped it right where I did before.

This time, she made a bit of a face, but handed it back to me.

Yup, immediately it was back on the floor, just a bit farther from her this time. All the while our discussion was ongoing. After the **fourth** time I dropped the pencil and she gave it back to me, I asked her the Magic Question:

“As you continued to fetch the pencil (yes I used that word), did you feel smarter than a cat? Because no cat I know would have bothered even the first time.”

“Well then, that just proves dogs are nicer than cats!”

Which I’ll give you in a lot of cases. But smart? Two different things. I’d rather have a cat be selfish and honest than have a dog treat me like a diety.

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**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/53 "2010-02-24T19:48:15Z")

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> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#):
>
> Dogs are hardwired to fawn over the pack leader. Cats have no such instinct - when they come and sit on you (after you’ve taken care of all their whims), it’s because they want to be with _you_.

My cat (we have two, but one is clearly mine) sleeps between my feet at night. Around 6am, she hops down, goes to our bathroom and hops up on the sink. She then waits there - for me. Around 6:15 or so, I get up and head into the bathroom. She perks up and starts circling the sink waitin’ for some lovin’…which must be fully provided before I can continue with my morning ablutions…

…my wife calls her my mistress. 😉

So - I agree with the “a cat wants to be with _you_” and really enjoy it when I have a cat like that…but dogs are cool, too.

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**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/54 "2010-02-24T19:52:43Z")

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> [@Mr Bus Guy](#):
>
> I’d rather have a cat be selfish and honest than have a dog treat me like a diety.

Why?

There are a lot of animals that are selfish and “honest”, but that doesn’t make them good companions.

Edited to add: Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some cats in the past that I’ve loved. But if I want an animal to ignore me, there are a lot of options other than cats.

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**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/55 "2010-02-24T20:05:13Z")

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> [@Lightnin](#):
>
> Why?
> 
> There are a lot of animals that are selfish and “honest”, but that doesn’t make them good companions.
> 
> Edited to add: Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some cats in the past that I’ve loved. But if I want an animal to ignore me, there are a lot of options other than cats.

I’ll steal a part of my answer from the inimitable Richard “Kinky” Friedman. This is a portion of a eulogy he wrote for his cat. A cat that was his companion, and that he made into a lasting character in his novels:

* * *

“…People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a privilege in this world.”\*\*\*

[Reference here.](http://www.kinkajourecords.com/cudepil.htm)  
I didn’t mean to convey that I wanted any animal to ignore me. Hell, I’d buy a lizard or a goldfish for that. Where I was going with that was that when a cat shows affection, and all of mine do regularly, it’s because they WANT to. Sure they make noise and rub against me when they’re hungry, etc. But when all their needs are met and they just decide that lying down next to you to relax – it’s an honest sort of a feeling. I have a cat I raised from when he was a two week old abandoned, rescued thing. For kicks, every now and then he decides to sit and groom me, much like you’d see one cat do for another. I’m his Momma, he has some sort of cat-feelingish love for me and shows it just because.

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**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/56 "2010-02-24T20:13:59Z")

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> [@Mr Bus Guy](#):
>
> Which I’ll give you in a lot of cases. But smart? Two different things. I’d rather have a cat be selfish and honest than have a dog treat me like a diety.

1. This isn’t about “smart”.
2. That’s not a good measurement of “smart”.
3. How is a dog’s behavior in this regard “dishonest”?

So your argument boils down to (after correction): do you prefer selfish & honest or selfless & honest? How is the first even an option? And why are those the ONLY options?

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**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/57 "2010-02-24T20:17:28Z")

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> [@CrazyCatLady](#):
>
> You’ve not known enough cats, then. We had one who forgot her way around the three-room shotgun apartment after we left her with the in-laws for a few weeks and thought she could effectively hide behind a chair leg 1/5 her width. We’ve got one right now that continually shuts himself into closets, bathrooms, the pantry and the basement. He pushes the door open, then it swings closed and he attempts to push it back open but succeeds only in latching it closed. And then he sits and cries until someone comes along to let him out. Five minutes later, he’s trying to open the door again. Dumb.
> 
> Both terribly sweet cats, but dumb as bricks.

We have a dumb cat…and clumsy to boot.

It is not uncommon for him to walk along something and just fall off. One time he tried to jump up to the bathtub 3 TIMES and hit the side of it twice. This bathtub is only 3 feet off the floor. This had me concerned and I watched him carefully…but when he made an 6 foot jump straight up to a cabinet I figured he was alright.

I actually (unlike my wife and daughter) think he isn’t as dumb as we/they think he is. He knows his name and responds to it. My wife said no way and that he just responded to the tone of voice. George (the cat) came along and to prove it I looked at him and said ‘SAM!’ (name of other cat)…he looks at me. I say ‘HARRY’…nothing…I say ‘GEORGE’ and he meows. 🙂 The other day he had a food ball and I was thinking of refilling it but couldn’t find it. I said ‘GEORGE…where’s your ball?’ he looks at me. I say ‘ball!’…he walks into the other room, I follow and he stands over the ball hidden by a blanket. 😃

Not so dumb…but he is our dumb, clumsy, goofy fuzzy butt.

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/58 "2010-02-24T20:19:19Z")

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> [@Munch](#):
>
> 1. This isn’t about “smart”.
> 2. That’s not a good measurement of “smart”.
> 3. How is a dog’s behavior in this regard “dishonest”?
> 
> So your argument boils down to (after correction): do you prefer selfish & honest or selfless & honest? How is the first even an option? And why are those the ONLY options?

Dogs stink.

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/59 "2010-02-24T20:20:55Z")

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> [@Mr Bus Guy](#):
>
> I’d rather have a cat be selfish and honest than have a dog treat me like a diety.

So do you think the woman in this story was treating you like a diety?

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**Author:** ![BMada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/96bed5/32.png) [@BMada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMada)\
**Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dogs-are-superior-to-cats/530200/60 "2010-02-24T22:46:54Z")

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i love dogs.

All cats can go to hell. One bit me, I couldn’t get to it, so rabies vaccinations came my way. That’s the last time I try to pet a cat of a person who visited a soup kitchen i volunteered at. That’s the last time I try to be nice to a cat in general. I’d prefer to kick all cats I see in the street as if they were footballs ready to be punted. I’m totally anti-cat. They are unpredictable pieces of shit.

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