# Doing the "right" thing, when it doesn't matter, what's in it for you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 10, 2012, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539 "2012-05-10T18:54:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/21 "2012-05-10T21:04:21Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > But when it comes to less dire things, some people still want to do what’s right, no matter how low risk the situation is. An example, stopping at a stoplight at 3 am when there’s hundreds of feet of visability each way. Some people would roll through that light. Others, will stop as if it were a busy intersection at 3pm, on a hill. How often do you hear car accidents descibed with “I don’t know what happened. He came out of nowhere.”? I never want to be the one giving that description so I drive safely even when I have every reason to think nobody else is around. As for the rest of the post, I’ll simply point to **DearestDane** and **storyguide3** who’ve already expresed my beliefs quite well. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/22 "2012-05-10T21:12:39Z")
> [@storyguide3](#): > > “Character is what you are in the dark.” - Dwight L. Moody This is why I do all my wanking with a light on in the room. I ain’t no wanker. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/23 "2012-05-10T21:13:46Z")
If I don’t do the right thing, I don’t feel relieved, like I’ve somehow stuck it to the man or have been more efficient. I feel guilty. I feel bad enough as it is about things over which I have no control. Why would I want to feel bad about something I could’ve prevented? Plus, I’ve got kids. They do what I do. I don’t want them making shortcuts; therefore, I try not to make them. Also, doing the right thing when no one is there is generally not difficult. Stopping at a stop sign when no one is watching takes 10 seconds. How much time am I really going to save by rolling right on through? ---
**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/24 "2012-05-10T21:31:21Z")
Because it feels good. Feelilng good about yourself is important. Doing the right thing makes me feel good. Ergo, I do the right thing. I also try to be the adult I want my kids to be and the one my parents are happy to have raised. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/25 "2012-05-10T21:35:42Z")
I’m actually surprised by the OP’s question. I don’t think society has a shortage of dumbasses, assholes and douchebags who choose to not do the “right” thing. But I get what he is saying. There are just some people who seem to be unable to cut loose in any way whatsoever. It’s as if they worry that any infraction will derail their race to the middle. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/26 "2012-05-10T22:21:28Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > … mace a random guy and cut out his kidneys to sell on the black market. Kidneys! They’re everywhere! For the taking! And people will pay thousands of dollars for them! ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/27 "2012-05-10T22:28:15Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > . . . Some of us, when we do a wrong thing, worry about other people finding out. If you don’t cheat on the test, you don’t have to worry about whether someone will find evidence that you cheated on the test. You know they won’t. That worry can outweigh any good feelings you get from not having wasted time studying for the test, if you’re prone to worry. This reminds me of a recent study in which the people who cheated on tests went on to estimate their odds of knowing the answers on the tested subject as if they had not cheated. In other words, they started to overestimate their knowledge. Before they cheated, they lacked information on the subject. After they cheated, they lacked information on the subject and they held inaccurate information about themselves. I’m pretty sure that knowing less about themselves was not a risk that anyone considered when deciding whether or not to cheat. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/28 "2012-05-10T22:34:35Z")
> [@storyguide3](#): > > “Character is what you are in the dark.” - Dwight L. Moody I was going to say “What you do when nobody is looking is what we call _character_” but you had a better quote. I stop at signs at 3AM though because it’s a habit and I don’t want to lose that particular habit. ---
**Author:** ![pullin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c57346/32.png) [@pullin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pullin)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/29 "2012-05-11T09:56:41Z")
Part of the reason is that doing the “right” thing generally works out best for me. For every clever crook that manages scam a bunch of customers and get rich, there are thousands of his fellow scumbags either in jail or living out of dumpsters. I figure it’s like the lottery, If I become a lying thief, I might be the one in a million who becomes the prez of AIG, but it’s more likely I’ll end up hated, friendless and poor. Obey the law, pay your bills, save a little, don’t cheat on the spouse. These are actually pretty simple rules and usually will work out for the best, even though you’ll have quite a few times where you end up thinking: “I could totally have gotten away with that; And no one would’ve known.” To me it’s analogous to my morning commute. Experience has shown the rules are: if I take \*this \*route, and stay in \*this \*lane, I’ll get there faster on 95% of the days. I just accept the few times I end up losing time due to following the rules. I don’t know if any of this makes sense, but it’s the best I can do on only one cup of coffee. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/30 "2012-05-11T11:09:33Z")
Also, it is often not a detailed conscious decision. In the case of waiting at a red light it’s habit: I’m not even thinking about whether in this specific situation I can safely and ethically drive through. But, even if I were to think about it, I would probably still wait: saving myself a few seconds is not worth not being able to truthfully say “I never run red lights”. And it’s a myth that we always weigh up the utility of every action and choose the optimal one. Utility comes into it, but there are other factors. At work, I define myself by my job role. So I will often do things that require effort that the boss won’t notice or care about, but it’s part of my identity. We all do this at least some of the time. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/31 "2012-05-11T12:54:04Z")
Some of us would rather have an easy life than a life with lots of thrills. Doing the right thing, or, rather, not doing wrong things, often leads to an easier life. Not sleeping with someone else’s SO for revenge is a good example of something that is likely to lead to an easier life. Developing habits of doing the right thing is also likely to do this. If you’re in the habit of always stopping at red lights and never going until the light is green, it gets so you just do that every time you encounter a red light. You don’t have to think about whether you should stop or not. That’s easier than having to think “do I really have to stop” every time you’re at a red light. I prefer to get my thrills in computer games, where you can save the game and reload if bad things happen. All the thrills, none of the real-life consequences to deal with- that’s a win-win in my book. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/32 "2012-05-11T13:04:24Z")
In the words of a coworker “I don’t do my job right because it’s a terribly important job, I do it right because it’s me doing it”. IOW, self-respect and pride. As for geography being unimportant… I know you’re not the travel agent who sent me to an airport 70km from Milano (landing at 11pm), then set me up with a hotel in downtown Milano and the connecting flight was from that same airport, next morning at 7am, but hey… geography is unimportant until it bites your ass. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/33 "2012-05-11T13:24:12Z")
Mostly it’s just not worth it to me. Yeah, there’s always the twinge of self-satisfaction, and the fact that I like being a person, but there’s TONS of stuff I think is stupid that I still don’t do. Drugs? I’ve been around weed, it mostly made my eyes hurt. I think it should be legal, but I still wouldn’t want to do it. Harder drugs? I’ll take NOT having a physical dependency, thanks. Others like LSD? Sounds fun, I guess, but I’m not sure it sound “prison” fun. Being perpetually drunk? Well, for one it’s an unsustainable lifestyle. But on top of that, I personally hate the feeling of being buzzed (I get irritable because my brain refuses to complete thoughts), I can’t even imagine how much I’d hate “drunk.” Traffic Laws? Okay, I really think traffic laws are a fancy way of saying “fund raiser.” In other words, everything I’ve seen points to a lot of crap like speed limits being at best useless. I still follow them roughly at all times, why? I don’t want to lose 500 bucks on a ticket, or get a felony for going 25 miles over. Or even just have to be without my car because I was stupid and hit something. So a lot of the reasons are still rather selfish. Ultimately, for stuff other than that (helping a stranger out, helping a kid find their mom, whatever), I mostly do it because I feel like it should be done. I’m sure if you were one of those “everybody is self serving” people you could point to me avoiding guilt, or trying to keep society working because society ultimately benefits me or something, but mostly it just feels like I SHOULD, so I DO. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/34 "2012-05-11T13:27:20Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > Sometimes not doing the “right thing” is simply more productive. What’s the matter with cheating on a geography test in high school. You’ll get a good grade and save time by not studying. **Geography is mostly useless.** Now, it would be much different if a med student cheated on a test on how to perform a successful surgery. 😕 I won’t parrot what others have said, but completely agree with everyone but you. RE: Geography. Number one, it is important. And number 2, school is more about learning how to learn, not just remembering facts. [QUOTE=Diamonds02] And who wouldn’t like to get back at an asshole who did something shady to you, by sleeping with his girlfriend? [/quote] Me, and pretty much every decent person on the planet. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/35 "2012-05-11T13:33:55Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > It’s easier to do the right thing when it counts if you are in the habit of doing the right thing. And humans are pretty bad about judging “when it counts” and when it doesn’t. People who go around doing the “wrong thing” when it “doesn’t matter” or when they are sure they won’t get caught, have a strong tendency to screw up and do the wrong thing when it _does_ matter and they _will_ get caught. The prisons are full of people who were sure they wouldn’t get caught, and history is full of unintended consequences. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/36 "2012-05-11T13:34:03Z")
Oh, as for cheating on tests. I’ll admit I’ve done that one. I’m terrible at memorization, and sometimes I just really don’t think it matters. Most of the time cheating is bad, but there were cases with terrible teachers, terrible tests, and/or terrible course material where I don’t think it was really that big a deal. Granted, we’re talking about writing a term on my palm or something, nothing on the level of plagiarism. ---
**Author:** ![Ken001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/43a26b/32.png) [@Ken001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ken001)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/37 "2012-05-11T13:41:28Z")
> [@Valgard](#): > > Because I like knowing that I’m the kind of man who will do the right thing even when nobody is watching, because it’s the right thing to do. > > Because I don’t want to feel like a hypocrite when I tell my stepson to always do the right thing, even when an adult isn’t watching you. Otherwise it gives the message that it’s not about doing the right thing, it’s about not getting caught. Good man. There are some nice succinct quips in this thread. Essentially we have to each decide what is “right”. For example I used to ride at excessive speeds on my Ducati, not because I thought it was right or even a good idea, but because it gave me joy. Sustained joy over hours. I’ve paid a heavy price (head injury) for that but still do not see the speed as “wrong”. Right and wrong have moral imperatives attached. However I’d struggle to explain that because its a deep philosophical discussion. Do no harm. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/38 "2012-05-11T13:56:12Z")
> [@Ken001](#): > > Good man. There are some nice succinct quips in this thread. > > Essentially we have to each decide what is “right”. For example I used to ride at excessive speeds on my Ducati, not because I thought it was right or even a good idea, but because it gave me joy. Sustained joy over hours. I’ve paid a heavy price (head injury) for that but still do not see the speed as “wrong”. > > Right and wrong have moral imperatives attached. However I’d struggle to explain that because its a deep philosophical discussion. > > Do no harm. You did harm to others (those who care for/about you) as well as to yourself. By your own definition, that was wrong. ---
**Author:** ![D47C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4bbf92/32.png) [@D47C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D47C)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/39 "2012-05-11T14:05:59Z")
I’m not sure at all what the “Right Thing” actually means as far as I can tell its cultural. But it is to be noted you are not playing the game very well if can’t hustle the mark indefinately which means you have to a good person most of the time. Also in a more general sense there is the concept (and potential outcomes) of The Prisoners Dilemma to consider. ---
**Author:** ![Zulema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/db5fbb/32.png) [@Zulema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zulema)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539/40 "2012-05-11T14:58:28Z")
Because most rules are there for a reason. I stop at lights and signs in the middle of the night because if I don’t I’m risking an accident that would be my fault. Hundreds of feet of visibility may not be enough to make a quick assessment if there’s someone going 100 miles an hour the other way because it’s in the middle of the night and they have the right of way. If two cars go through one intersection in one night, fate has a way of making sure that happens at the same time. I pick up my dog’s poop even when no one is watching because it’s rude to leave it around for someone to step in. I pick up trash on the ground if no one is looking because it makes the neighborhood look nicer. I don’t cheat on tests because then I’ve cheated myself out of knowledge. I wash my hands after using the rest room because it protects the community from germs and frequent handwashing protects me from disease. etc. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doing-the-right-thing-when-it-doesnt-matter-whats-in-it-for-you/621539.md?page=3)